Just Relax

Loki grinds his teeth when he hears Sasha giggling in the kitchen, feeling jealous even though he knew that she would never cheat on him. It still irked him that the hunter she was chatting with had the gall to flirt with her, though. Dean Winchester—cocky bastard might find himself in a hospital if he kept trying to charm Loki's wife. "What's got your boxers in a twist," Tony asks, sitting in the armchair across from Loki, and resting his dirty boots on the coffee table that separated them. Pepper would break Tony's foot if she saw it, but Pepper is downtown at a press conference.

"That man in there," Loki growls, pointing towards the door that leads into the kitchen. Sasha giggles again, her voice muffled. Tony shrugs with a relaxed smile. "How could you let your daughter associate with that filthy Midgardian?"

"Dean's a good guy; he wouldn't try anything if he values his nether regions." The causal way that Tony spoke bout castrating the hunter made Loki a little less tense, knowing full well that Tony was extremely protective of Sasha, more so than Loki. It came with being a father, he already felt protective of the little girl in Sasha's belly and they only found out about her two weeks before. He knew it was a girl, all his instincts told him so; that caused Sasha to say it was a boy just to annoy him for not wearing protection that one time. Dean's the one laughing now, and Loki's green eyes narrow into angry slits.

"Seriously, why don't you just go hover in the kitchen if you're so worried?"

"Because Sasha hates when I'm overprotective, but she's pregnant now so she might actually go through with her threat."

"What threat?"

"It's too horrible a thing to mention." Loki shivers, paling at the threat of all threats that only Sasha's devious, demented mind could concoct. "On the other hand, if I don't go in there I might accidentally blast Winchester to tiny bits and spread those bits all over Manhattan." Tony raises both eyebrows, the corners of his mouth turning up in the tiniest of smiles. "Of course, that might happen anyway." Tony snorts, shaking his head and walking into the kitchen. It's Loki's turn to smirk then, Sasha had forbidden anyone to intrude in her kitchen so she could catch up with her friend. Moments later Tony runs out with his tail between his legs, sprinting towards the garage, and shouting something about pickles and vanilla frosting. That's another thing Loki didn't like, the cravings that made his stomach turn.

Peanut butter and banana sandwiches were bad enough, but then she got pregnant and now she dips brownies in mayonnaise—that's the easiest craving to deal with compared to the others. He shivers again, his stomach churning. The worst of all about this pregnancy is the morning sickness—he didn't understand why they called it that because it happened at night on more than one occasion and often ended with Loki and Steve being sick with her. Tony stayed away on those nights, preferring the couch to a sick daughter; Banner was completely fine with it, helping her through the worst and holding back her hair while Clint held back Loki's. Curiosity was beginning to get the best of him, he needed to know what Sasha found so freaking hilarious. What could that hunter have to say that made Sasha react in such a positive way when everyone else only made her angry? "Sasha," he calls out softly," if you want me to come in the kitchen don't talk to me." He listens for a second, grinning when Sasha continues to talk to Winchester.

With a chuckle, he pushes the kitchen door open a crack so he could see inside and hear what they were saying. Dean sat next to her with one arm draped around Sasha's shoulders, retelling something about his younger brother's fear of clowns. If he didn't remove that arm by the time Loki had mentally counted to three it would be torn off and served to him on a plate. One...Two...Thr— "What the hell do you think you're doing?!" Sasha's sudden cry made Loki jump and scramble to get away. "Didn't I warn you what would happen if you disturbed me?"

Loki gulps, falling backwards onto his ass as his wife approaches him with her hands on her hips. "S-s-s-" he stammers, staring up with wide, terrified eyes. "S-s-sor-r-ry."

"You will be," she snarls, pointing to the silver device in the kitchen that scared Loki so much. "You know what to do, Mister god, get crackin'!" Shaking, Loki approaches the device, quickly going through the motions that he had nightmares about. Slowly, he pushes the lever down and then he waits, shaking and dreading what he knew would happen at any possible moment. No matter how much he prepared himself, he still jumped and shrieked like a little girl when the food popped up. In the end, it seems that the toaster won the battle that day as Loki fainted on the spot and Sasha was left to wake him up.