Alptraum

A/N: Strange, I had thought this would turn out AU, but it never did. All for the better, I suppose.

Alptraum
All children have nightmares...
Kurt had horrible nightmares.
He would wake up shrieking in German, curled in a tightly wound blue ball, with cold, clammy sweat making him shiver and curl into himself. It wasn't odd to find him tangled in the sheets from his bed, clawing and whimpering as if he were being attacked by some unseen monster.
"Bitte, bitte nicht! Ich werde nicht, ich nicht stoppe, ihn bitte, ich bedeutete nicht zu, ich wiederhole ihn nicht! Bitte stoppen Gott ihn bitte, stoppen ihn! Er verletzt, Gott bitte es verletzt...*" His breaths hissed on their intake, little whimpers escaping his mouth.
Kurt would sit up in bed, wrap his blanket around his shoulders, and stare out the window at the grounds below. His eyes wide, no sound would creep past his lips. He might stay that way all night, silent and deathly still for hours. He could hear the voices in his head echoing with the same malicious phrase: "But all bad little children have nightmares..."
Kurt hadn't ever meant to kill anyone. Least of all Stefan. But it had happened when he'd only tried to do what Stefan had asked him. He'd been killing children! Even if they were demons, they weren't doing anyone harm. Who knew what could have happened if they hadn't been mercilessly slaughtered by his own brother?
It had been a blur, an impossibly fast few seconds before his hands and tail were wrapped around Stefan's neck. He'd only been trying to shake him out of it; Kurt knew his brother had to be in there somewhere. But he heard the snap of the bones' displacement all too clearly when he shook Stefan's body the last time.
His head lolled backwards into Kurt's dark three-fingered hands, a look of utter shock etched onto his features. He had turned Stefan's lips blue from lack of air, and snapped his neck.
This wasn't supposed to happen! What would Margali say? What was he going to do? There was no other choice but for him to bury the man, but...he hadn't meant to kill him! He was breathing too fast; his head was starting to spin around him like a crazed carousel. And he couldn't calm down, he had to do all these things! The children, who would bury them?
He could hear those thoughts echoing in his head all night. Kurt thought for the longest time he was going crazy. For a much longer time he thought--knew--he would go straight to hell. Every night the voices served as a reminder that he couldn't escape what he'd done. Never.
Mein Gott, warum haben sie keine gnade? Bitte, bewilligen Sie mir rettung...**
All children have nightmares. Some of them are real.



Rough--very rough--translations:
*Please, please don't! I won't, I won't, please, stop it, I didn't mean to, I won't do it again! Please, god, please, stop it, stop it! It hurts, god, please, it hurts...
**My God, why have you no mercy? Please, grant me salvation...