Lust and Cookies

Title: Lust and Cookies
Author: Mitsaso
E-mail:Mitsaso@in.gr,Mitsaso_X@hotmail.com
Are: Je: Just inform me if you want to archive it someplace else. I won't have any problem with that!
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the X-Men, they belong to Marvel and Stan Lee. No profit is made of this story, so please hold back the urge to sue me. The Three-Headed-Monkey belongs to LucasArts. On the other hand, Zazelle, Paula Dunn and Dave all belong to me.
Rating: NC-17.Raw language. Sex, though not explicit... Incredibly slutty original character.Kinky situations,but nothing explicit.Vicious murder of an insect.Really groightight scenes.
Summary: New mutants with weird powers mess up the not-so-normal life of the X-Men.
Feedback: Yes, please! There are going to be sequels, so I have to know if this is worthwhile. See my e-mail above.
Warnings: This is my first story ever! So feedback is needed for me to see if it is worth continuing. As for spoilers, I think my story is sort of AU, since I'm not sure if the X-Men in this fic ever were the exact composure of the X-team. I'd also like your opinion on the original characters, do they feel like a Mary-Sue or not? The song used in a part of the story is "Lola" from The Kinks. This story is more of the humorous kind, but not exactly a sillyfic. My humour is too weird for that.
So, here goes the story. Enjoy!

( [] indicate telepathic conversation )
***************************************************************

Salem Centre, sometime in the late morning.

The not-so small Bank of Salem Centre was having one of its rather busy days.
Lots of people were moving around in the building, resembling bees in a beehive.
And well, we all know what stands for the honey in this case (we are in a bank, after all): Money.
Or, more accurately, the clerk stalls that are supposed to provide money.

Paula Dunn was one of the oh-so unlucky clerks to be working at that morning. Unlucky not only because she had to work her ass off in such a busy morning at work, but also because of some situation that was going tcur cur in the very near future, that being the next few minutes.

"I knew I shouldn't let Jenna get away with it today! » Paula was very upset because she wasn't supposed to be working today.

But she promised Jenna, who also worked there, that she would cover her place that morning, since Jenna had some very important business that would make her unavailable for work today. Family matters or something, as she remembers Jenna hastily saying that one of her uncles was at the hospital again.

But why should Paula pay for it every time one of Jenna's relatives would have some health problems? Plus, considering how many times Paula had to cover for Jenna, half of her-quite large-family must have been 6 feet under until now.

"Oh yeah, this is the last time I'm doing this...Damn right, it is."

*******************************************************

Someplace else...or more accurately, a beach not that far from there...

"But h-bun-buns, you promised you would take me to the beach for a picnic!!!"

"That's right, Jenna, I did! So keep eating your Big Mac and stop scaring away the fish!"

"You never mentioned I would do the eating and you would spend the whole day feeding the fishies...I mean, fishing."

"Hey, you always complained we never share our hobbies! So here we are, and I'm fishing! What’s your problem now?"

"By *sharing ourbiesbies* I meant you taking me shopping!"

"Bwahahahahahaha!", an ironic-and totally fake- laugh was Frank's(Jenna's boyfriend)answer.

"Jerk", she thought. "I'll just wait until you get me back home in that sorry excuse for a car of yours. This is the last time we *ever* do *anything* together...Damn right it is."

********************************************************
Back at the (rather busy until now) Bank.

Paula kept pretending she was having a very important business call while a mean-looking woman was waiting for her turn right above her head. She always did that in case someone got too bored to wait for her and abandoned the line in front of her stall. Less work to do that way. Ha.

"No, sir, I told you can't use the account that was created for your daughter", she told the nobody in the other side of the line.

"Toot toot toot», was the answer, since she wasn't talking to anyone.

"Well, because you and your wyouryourselves started the account under the condition that only she would be able to draw money from it! Why change that now?» That was her favourite of all her especially made-up phone dialogues. The father that wanted to take advantage of his own daughter's money always affected dramatically the clients overhearing at the time, so they wouldn't pester her.

While being pissed of at the non-tenttent bastard who called her, Paula noticed a very distinguishing woman striding through the other clients.

The woman was wearing a very revealing and tight vinyl costume, covering as much as a one-piece bath suit. Her legs were totally exposed, rowing lustful and confused stares from people around her. She also wore vinyl boots in the same copper red colour as the rest of her costume. The boots were going up to thigh level.

Her breasts were also mostly exposed from the top of her vinyl costume. They were too big to fit in there anyway.

She had strikingly bright brown hair, black eyes (yeah, she was close enough to the clerk stall now for Paula to notice her eye colour) and full, incredible Angelina-Jolie type lips.

She looked like a freakin whorey porn-star who left in the middle of shooting to get something to eat, but went to the bank instead.

"Whore", was the first comment who came in Paula's mind.

Then the whore-woman came straight at Paula, pushing the others in the line in a rather rude way.

"I could help you if you wanted something, but you will have to get yourself r at at the end of the line now, miss." Paula acted like she was in front of a common client who just was in a rush.

The slut in the whore costume eyed her in an awe-inspiring way.

"Shut up bitch. This is a bank robbery", she said.

Paula suppressed her incoming laughs, and pressed the button under her stall, hoping that the cute cop in the tight uniform would be along with the other cops today.

*********************************************************
Zazelle saw the clerk reaching for something under her desk.
"Call the cops, yeah. The more, the better. », she thought.

The clerk looked up on Zazelle again, gawking for a second on her impressive busto, and opened her mouth.

"May I ask you how you intend to rob the bank without some sort of weapon, which I would have seen if you kept it hidden in that...costume."

She knew that the clerk looked bitchy from the moment she entered the bank. The bitch wore a card on her jacket that wrote "Paula".

Right. Like she was a waitress or something.

"I knew I should pick the guy in the geeky glasses to begin with the robbery. "Whoops, did she say that out loud?

"You still want to rob the bank, miss? Hey, shouldn't there be a whip matching with that outfit?"

Fucking bitch. If she didn't have to get the money quick, she would kick her ass back to the hellhole she popped up from.

"OK, I was intending to use my powers anyway. Doing it five minutes earlier won't hurt anyway. "That, Zazelle said out loud, on purpose of course.

"Huh, another mutant? We're not so unprotected you know, you-"the bitchclerk paused and her eyes grew bigger.

Zazelle licked her lips. "I love my job".


***********************************************************

Paula felt the heat coming from inside her catching her mid-sentence. She felt damn hot, she had to do something.

But the heat obviously created from the slut's powers wasn't from any kind of fire.

It was pure, unintended lust.

Paula started to moan and rub her body from the outside of her clothes.

In a not so subtle way, as everyone in the bank noticed.

***********************************************************

As Paula the bitchclerk started her show in the middle of the bank, drawing everyone's attention, Zazelle smiled.

As she laid back on her clerk stall chair and started stripping, everyone subconsciously got closer to watch, and now Zazelle had another advantage in the whole bank-robbing business.

She extended her mind, using her powers on everyone in the building, just as the cops extended their guns while entering the bank.

"Just my lucky day. Heh."

A very studly cop, the one you would definitely want to have on a naked-cop-calendar, pointed his gun at her. Why, of all people, would he assume that the criminal was a totally innocent-looking lady only clad in some seriously S/M outfit?

"Freeze!», he said.

But he was the one who froze.

That's because he started feeling the same intense feeling he would feel in totally different situations, like when he would watch his girlfriend strip for him, or when he woke in the morning and the bulge under the sheets would be the first thing he would see.
But now was not the right time or place for that kind of feelings.

He felt immensely horny. So damn horny that he couldn't concentrate on his gun and the suspicious hottie in the tight vinyl outfit.

Zazelle watched as everyone in the bank started acting like all those lust-struck people in bad porn movies.

They would start touching themselves, getting clothes off, getting ready for action.

Even some of the cops let their guns fall on the floor and started getting into the groove of the situation.

Well, the cute cop remained frozen, still unsure of what to do.

Right then, Zazelle noticed an old lady closing in. She was the default, generic old lady in any movie with bank robberies. I mean, in every damn movie involving bank robberies, the criminals will tell some old lady "You should lie on the floor too, Granny!", and she will tremble and squeal and finally lie down or something. Well, this robbery also has its own old lady.

The aforementioned old lady let her little fox terrier fall on the floor(she was holding it up to then),and the horny dog went straight at some big bulldog at the other side of the bank to get off together.

The old bat (sorry, old lady :-) ) also let highhighly unfashionable pink bag(which matched her also pink outfit) fall down. She approached the cute cop, while he was still holding his gun towards Zazelle, knelt before him, her head levelling his groin area, and unzipped his pants. He was too horny and stunned to react at this.

Zazelle almost felt sorry for him.

But she couldn't help herself grinning when the cop's eyes went wide open and his gun went down, hitting the busy old hag (oops, lady) at the back.

"Ouch!" She cried, giving him a Death look. Then she went right back at her job at hanun iun intended ;-)).

"Hey, what can I say, the old chick has the juice after all!" Zazelle thought.

Soon the whole bank was in a sex craze. Zazelle somehow loved what she could do with her mutant powers. Even when used for malicious reasons, her powers always made people somehow happier. After all, that was the inner meaning of sex. To feel good.

Well, the hot cop surely wouldn't feel good after coming back to control of himself.

Zazelle had a look around to make sure everyone was under the effects of her mutant gifts, also known as "Control of the sex-related hormones on every living creature". Well, it worked for humans, and also at mutants. As she watched the old bat's doggie trying to ride the bulldog, she was sure it aworkworked on dogs.

But it wouldn't work on young children.

She felt someone kicking her on the knee, and turned around to see a little boy around 6 years old and his slightly older sister looking at her angri
\
"What did you do to our mommy, you bad, stupid POOPY-HEAD!" the boy said, his face reddened with anger.

Damn. No power was perfect, after all. She could not affect the sexually inactive people, like kids. She could have the effects of a Viagra on a 60-years old man, but anything under 12 or 13 was beyond her powers.

"Yeah, you FUCKING BITCH!", the older sister added her brother. Well, the bigger girl had a much richer vocabulary. "She went nund nnd now she's fighting with daddy for no reason!"
zellzelle had a look at where the kids pointed.

Their sweet mommy was grunting ferociously as she rode a really fat guy. Something told her that she just gave a new meaning to their sexual life.

"We want you to undo what you did to our mommy or else-"

"Oh, shut up, kiddo!" Zazelle thought that the e exe experience (with their parents doing whatever they did) would leave many marks on their sensitive psychology. Being verbally harassed by a stranger wouldn't make any big difference. Or even getting locked up somewhere.

She grabbed both kids and put each one under each armpit, like carrying watermelons. She found a big closet, used for storing paper and pens, and put the kids in there, ignoring the brutal abuse of the English language coming out of their filthy mouths.

"Fucking brats, where did you grow up, a whorehouse?", she said while locking the closet. She cast an eye on their mother, fucking.
"Well your mother certainly has the talents required for the job."

Zazelle signalled her lackeys -a total 5 of them to come in, grab the keys from the bank’s manager, currently fucking with his secretary-"Not for the first time», she realised-and go get whatever valuable there was in the safe, plus any money at the stalls that haven't been spoiled with bodily fluids.

She urged them to hurry and not just stand, looking at the show in front of them, because she now had to concentrate on not getting them horny along with the rest of the bank. Also, some of the people in here could not keep fucking forever, they would soon come to their senses.

She turned to the door to see what happened to the cop and the old lady, and instead noticed a familiar face. A man she knew well had just entered the bank and stared at her with anger.

"Dave?"

"Aw, c'mon, Zazelle, what the fuck is going on in here?", the man at the entrance said.

"Exactly the right words. What the *fuck*."

"Look, you have to stop whatever you're doing in here. You know it's not right not to take *such* advantage of your powers.

"Hey, you're my brother, you know...A rich sister can be a very valuable asset."

"Don't make me stop you by using force, Zazelle...please. After all, you can't use your powers on your own brother."

Damn. The biggest disadvantage of all. She could not use her power on anyone who they shared the same blood with. As in, family. Any blood-related family member was immune of her powers. That's why she ran off in the first place. Had to be active and useful.

"Look, Dave. I can't hurt you, but neither can you hurt me. You are a mutant, but your lame ass power is totally passive. Wouldn’t work on me anyway."

"What the hell, I can still slap you until your sense comes back in that empty head of yours!"

"Hey, that's why I brought my lackeys here on the first place!» she said, mockinly clapping her hands.

Four of her henchmen stopped whatever they were doing, got poor Dave, and kicked his ass.

"Hey! Don't leave any marks on him boys! He's still my baby brother, you know!", she yelled at them.

One of them kicked Dave on the nuts.

"HEY!! Do you want to be the next one being served by the old hag dressed in pink back there?? I don't think so!!!", she screamed at the thug who attempted to kill her future nephews.

"Serve this, bitch", she heard behind her as someone grabbed her hair and tossed her on the floor. She realised it was Paula the bitch-clerk. She had sperm all over hece ace and shoulders and three naked men were sleeping right beside the stall she used to work.

"Wow, I'm impressed of your bed skills", Zazelle said as she got up and they got into a catfight.

Zazelle's lackeys stopped kicking Dave's ass and watched their boss and the naked clerk catfighting, all the time cheering and whistling.

Paula was relatively good in close combat, comparing to Zazelle, who was used to doing other things when she was so close to people. aulaaula was having the upper hand, and would soon have kicked the slut's ass, if she hadn’t called to her lackeys for help.

"HEY JERKS!! Stop watching and help me out with that bitch!"

They all got up mumbling and got closer to the catfight.

"Hey-get away from me, fuckers!", Paula screamed. Then, Zazelle saw her extending her hands to the lackeys. They shined a little and what seemed like tons of cream came out of them, straight at the henchmen approaching. All 4 of them got buried under the cream.

Zazelle, totally astounded, got some of that cream on her finger and tasted it.

"Whipped cream?", she said. "A mutant that can kill you with whipped cream?" She burst out laughing.
***********************************************************

Paula was seriously pissed off. In only one morning she found herself tricked into coming to work, stripped and embarrassed herself in front of the whole shocked bank, and fucked involuntarily with three strangers, and none of them was the cute cop, who got funky with some soon-to-be-deceased old hag!
She also exposed her mutant identity in front of the whole bank, and all she got for it was getting laughed at because all she could do was create edible high-in-sugar stuff!

She could not handle herself anymore. The Rage took her over.

"YOU FUCKING BITCH! YOU WILL DIE, AND I WILL SPIT ON YOUR FACE, AND SHIT ON YOUR GRAVE, AND-AND-THEN, YOU WILL BE DEAD!!!"

After that, Paula went in a shock and she couldn't react in a way that would make her previous promises come true. She just stood there, trembling and murmuring strange words.

"Whoa. Total nervous breakdown, there. Too bad. I have to go", the ultra bitch named Zazelle(what kind of name is that, anyway?) mocked her, as she nodded to her remaining lackey, who was carrying the booty until then. "C'mon, Lance. We have to go. But *now*, so move your ass please!"

"As for you, little clerk, it seems that you don't get laid often. Fair enough! Take care.", she said, pinching her on the arm mockingly. Then both her and her henchman got their asses out of there.

And right on time, it seems, because Paula realised that the back-up for the cops got there just one minute after Zazelle left the bank.

But, hey, those guys weren’t dressed up like S.W.A.T.
"What the heck?". Paula thought. That's no S.W.A.T, it's those X-Men guys!