Indecent Obsession

Indecent Obsession – chapter four

Over the next few days Jean kept closer tabs on Scott and was alarmed to discover that his shields were in place almost continuously, which was definitely not a good sign. When she casually mentioned it to him, citing a frivolous reason for trying to contact him and failing, he lamely explained that the open ‘link’ was causing him migraines. Jean didn’t buy it for a minute, but tried to hide her disappointment in the transparent lie. When she and Charles discussed Rogue’s progress in controlling her mutation and how the meditation and telepathy were helping, she used the opportunity to bring up the subject of Scott’s blatant shielding. Charles agreeing that the behavior suggested an attempt to hide something did nothing to assuage Jean’s anxiety. Her mentor recommended that she either confront the situation ‘head on’ and deal with whatever consequences that action garnered or forget about it completely.

Later that night, and with trepidation, Jean chose the former.

They’d just made love – mutually satisfying love, except that Scott’s mental barriers were still firmly in place. Jean realized how much she missed that particular aspect of their relationship – the intimacy that went beyond the mere physical.

“Scott,” she began and then faltered, suddenly reconsidering if she really wanted to pry the truth from him or remain blissfully ignorant. She realized that being paranoid all the time was worse, and certainly no way to continue. Besides she might be worrying for nothing she thought, then gave herself a mental slap at the naiveté of that wish.

Scott meanwhile was waiting for her to say something beyond his name, so she swallowed the lump in her throat along with her inhibition and bluntly said, “I thought you should know that I don’t believe the migraine excuse. I think you’ve closed the link because you’re having sexual fantasies about someone else.”

There – it was out in the open. The knot in her stomach tightened and she felt relieved at having finally said something, yet nauseous at the same time.

Scott’s mouth dropped open and in the shock his shields slipped for just the briefest of moments, but it was just long enough for Jean to catch one thought – Rogue.

The look on Jean’s face told Scott that she hadn’t missed the name.

Jean didn’t need to ask Scott why he found Rogue particularly appealing – apart from the girl’s obvious prettiness and simmering-just-below-the-surface sensuality, it was the whole opportunity to stake his claim on ‘unchartered territory’ – the caveman-mentality desire to be someone’s ‘first’. The untouchable aspect undoubtedly just added to the intrigue for him.

The awkward silence was becoming uncomfortable.

“I think you should attempt to fulfill your fantasy – get it ‘out of your system’, so to speak,” Jean found herself telling him.

“Excuse me?” Scott asked in shock – this was not the reaction he’d been expecting. A high-decibel verbal scuffle followed by her telekinetically depositing his possessions in the hallway – maybe, but not this calm suggestion that he bed another woman.

“I want things to go back to the way they were between us,” Jean offered in explanation, “and I don’t think that’s possible until you’ve explored this urge, find out it’s not – as the kids say, ‘all that’ and realize you and I have a pretty good thing.” She ended by taking a necessary gulping breath.

“I do love you, Jean.”

“I know you do, Scott, or I wouldn’t risk losing you permanently by sending you off to temporarily be with someone else,” she said, then added, “I’m also counting on the work necessary to circumvent her mutation being so much effort, and then little Miss Inexperienced being so woefully bad after all that trouble, that you’ll regret you ever considered it.”

“Jean, I don’t need anything beyond….” Scott abruptly cut himself off.

“The fantasy,” Jean finished the thought for him.

Despite the glasses hiding his downcast eyes, Scott still managed to look sheepish.

“I can’t, or rather I should say, I won’t continue knowing you might be thinking of her while you’re with me. I deserve better than that.”

When it was apparent that Scott still couldn’t find the words to express himself Jean continued.

“You may succeed in seducing her, but it’s Logan she loves.”

Scott finally said something and it was completely the wrong thing. “And speaking of fantasy material.”

“Don’t make this about me and Logan,” she started to say.

“Maybe you want me to be with her, so you won’t feel so guilty about indulging in your own little fantasies about him. Maybe you’ve even considered exploring the possibility of turning them into reality whenever he finally drags his sorry ass and my bike back here. So if I’ve been unfaithful first, you’ll feel justified to screw him,” Scott said, continuing to shove his foot deeper into his mouth.

“You need to get past that, Scott, because it was old when he was still here. Yes, he flirted and yes, I was flattered – but not every woman wets their panties in the presence of the mighty Wolverine – no matter what you insist on believing,” she said beginning to get flushed and irritated.

“I seem to remember you doing a little shielding of your own when Mr. Overconfidence was around. You’ve thought about having Logan naked and conscious at the same time, so don’t bullshit me, Jean.”

“There’s a huge difference between a normal reaction to an attractive man and an on-going fantasy. I’m not pretending you’re him when we make love, can you claim the same thing about Rogue?”

“When I’m with you – it’s *you*.”

While still upset over the general theme of this conversation, Jean felt a wave of relief wash over her at that statement. She believed in his sincerity because she wanted – needed – to think that as hurtful as this conversation had become, he wouldn’t regress to lying now that they’d been so painfully honest.

Swinging the conversation back to Rogue, she said, “Of course, Logan may gut you if you ruin his plan to be *first*.”

“Granted, he’s got a hero complex where she’s concerned and she’s got a massive crush on him, but he has no romantic interest in her. He acts like an over-protective father, which she seems to have confused with true love.”

“Are you kidding? He does love her and not in a fatherly way; he’s just canoeing down the river of denial. Let’s look at all the evidence. He doesn’t leave her on the side of that road despite his admitted aversion to anything even remotely resembling a Good Samaritan act. When he woke up after you’d first brought him in, then after the stabbing incident and then again after the Statue – the first thing he did was ask about her. He panicked when she took off and ignored Charles’ suggestion to stay in the mansion to go after her. He went completely ballistic upon hearing her scream when she was strapped into Magneto’s machine, to the point of stabbing himself through the chest to get to her. Then he willingly gave her a dose of his healing factor, not knowing if he’d even survive it. Don’t you see? It’s all about her. It always has been. She’d broken through the walls he’d erected and that scared the hell out of him, so he brushed off my comment about her feelings for him and took off – after leaving her with his most sacred possession no less. And he continues to stay in contact with her; he maintains that link – strengthening the bond even over thousands of miles. When he comes back, and he will, it won’t be for me, it’ll be for her.”

~*~*~*

After Jean had gone to sleep, Scott slipped out of their room and went down to the Danger Room. He brought up one of his favorite *Rogue* encounters.

They were on a pick-up mission, which meant she was in her leather uniform. For some odd reason Jean, and even Storm in the leather didn’t excite Scott nearly as much as seeing *Rogue* poured into it. She always had the zipper low enough so that one more twist or really deep breath and she’d spill right out of the buttery-soft material. Thank God his own uniform was broken in so that it had enough room for his hard-on. The parents of the kid they’d been sent to collect were having second thoughts about sending their child away, so Scott and *Rogue* checked into a nearby motel. Conveniently the motel only had one room available and naturally that room had only one bed. Scott flung some cash down on the counter, not wanting to spend the extra time waiting for the credit card to be approved, grabbed the key and got them to the room in record time.

Scott closed and locked the door, turned to *Rogue* and without any hesitation told her, “I want you.”

There was a blur of activity as they stripped each other out of the leather and proceeded to do things all night long that were worthy of a porno script.

~*~*~*

The next morning the bloom of satisfaction from his rendezvous with *Rogue* managed to help him dismiss Jean’s comments regarding Logan’s true feelings towards the young woman. So maybe Logan did have a decidedly unfatherly attraction toward her, but he wasn’t here – yet. All Scott could think about was the ‘get out of jail free card’ that Jean had handed him last night and the fact that Logan’s imminent return meant that time was running out for him to use it.

In class that morning he gave his students a multi-chapter reading assignment so he was free to think about gloves, scarves and sheer body stockings. Knowing it was very inappropriate for him to display a prominent bulge in his neatly pressed dress pants, he had to wait until his classroom emptied out before he could safely head back to his room to jerk off. He wore the leather gloves of his uniform to simulate the hands of a certain tempting brunette. He’d just taken himself over the edge when Charles contacted him telepathically to request Scott’s presence in his office.

After cleaning up and composing himself, Scott made his way downstairs, hoping that Charles hadn’t caught the last fragments of what he’d been engaged in doing when the ‘call’ came in.

Scott knocked on the door and upon invitation entered to find Rogue sitting across from Charles. Surely Charles hadn’t told her about Scott’s indecent obsession and they were all here to discuss it. Scott looked at Charles to see if he could read anything in the man’s expression that would give him any clue as to what to expect from this meeting, but the older man’s face betrayed nothing. He sat in the chair to the left of Rogue and flashed her a brief smile. She beamed a dimpled smile back at him and his heart skipped a beat, then he shot his eyes up to Charles when he realized he was probably projecting. Charles’ face remained impassive, which mystified Scott as he was expecting a least a stern frown.

“Scott,” Charles began, interrupting any further contemplation, “There’s a new student from Montreal that requires transportation and I thought this would be a good first assignment for Rogue.”

Pick-ups were routine and relatively trouble-free, the perfect assignment for rookie team members.

“Yes, I agree. Who’ll be accompanying her?” Scott replied – surprising himself that he’d managed to get it out without any trace of hopeful anticipation that it would be him.

“Jean is in the middle of the annual physicals for the younger children and Storm is in Washington with the spelling bee participants, so I thought you could go with Rogue.”

It was like a dream come true.

“I think I can manage that,” he answered evenly.

“Wonderful. I want this pick up to be as discreet as possible, so you’ll be driving there instead of taking the jet. It’s too far to make the trip in one day, so I’ve had Mildred make the necessary arrangements for overnight accommodations. She has the hotel confirmation along with the address and directions to the boy’s home. Any questions?”

“Are we going as civilians?” Scott asked, already knowing that if they were traveling by ground they wouldn’t be wearing their uniforms, but it didn’t hurt to be optimistic.

“Of course,” Charles replied.

Okay, so there went that part of the fantasy.

~*~*~*

Later as Scott was packing, Jean silently handed him a box of condoms. Her expression, as he took it from her and wedged it next to the toothpaste in his toiletries bag, was one of undeniable hurt. She’d hoped he’d tell her he wouldn’t need them, that while he appreciated her giving him the opportunity to take a temporary break from their relationship without incurring irreparable damage, he’d never really entertained the idea of actually doing it. Jean understood the risk she’d taken by making the offer; she just hadn’t contemplated how much it would pain her to know that he was at least going to attempt to seduce Rogue. She made a feeble excuse about needing to check on something in the lab and made a hasty exit from the room. Somehow she managed to make it all the way down to her office before dissolving into tears.

Meanwhile in Rogue’s room, Kitty and Jubilee were helping her pack – or rather they were teasing her about what was appropriate attire one wore when faced with the prospect of ‘alone time’ with the best-looking guy under Xavier’s roof.

“It’s a mission, not my honeymoon,” Rogue reminded them as she rebuffed the offer of a sheer piece of fabric that Jubilee swore was a nightgown, “Besides, Scott hardly thinks of me that way.”

Jubilee and Kitty exchanged knowing looks.

“What?” Rogue asked in exasperation.

“Rogue, you really can be quite dense at times,” Jubilee stated with a roll of her eyes.

Rogue just stood there looking even more confused.

“Let me put it this way, chica, he sure doesn’t get a serious case of ‘wood’ when he’s looking at me or Kitty.”

Rogue turned to Kitty for confirmation of Jubilee’s declaration. She nodded in the affirmative and Rogue’s cheeks flamed.

“If Logan can horn-dog after Dr. Grey, then it’s only fair that Scott can have pervy thoughts about you,” Jubilee proclaimed.

“Seems fair to me,” Kitty agreed.

The blush suffusing Rogue’s cheeks shot right down to her toes.

“I can’t go on this mission with him. I’ll never be able to look him in the face.”

“Maybe he likes to do it ‘doggie-style’ and you won’t have to worry about that problem,” Kitty offered with a giggle.

Rogue’s mouth dropped open.

A phone call from Dr. McCoy requesting Rogue’s presence in the medlab gave her an excuse to avoid any further discussion on the subject.