When Nerds Collide

Remy sat in the Professor's office... It was another of those...weekly therapy sessions.



The old man looked at him and Remy felt...like just breaking down. Which might be a good thing. The Professor had said that they would need to break him, then build him back up... Remy was afraid of that though. He didn't like letting go of the facade and control. He didn't like exposing how he really felt. Sure, he played the happy-go-lucky, cajun dumbass...but really...He was a very messed up, scared little boy.



Remy let out a shaky breath and looked up at the old man, "I'm...afraid. Of...everythin'...Failure, love, trust...deep, murky water, de dark..." He sighed again and sat forward, "Just seems like...that...when t'ings start goin' good f' Remy...dere's always somethin' in de background ready t' shoot everythin' down...Everytime I get ahead, I fall back ten steps... I'm at m' wits end, homme...dunno how much more o' dis I can take."



Charles Xavier sat back in his chair, regarding the near broken man in front of him. Remy had had a very hard life...and it was taking it's toll. He didn't want to lose the Cajun. Not at all. Remy was...an asset to the team and such a wonderful person to be around. No one left Remy's presence without a smile on their face. Hell, his divorce ended in a hug. But that was the thing about Remy. He was constantly trying to please people...to make them happy, make them love him, want to be with him...without his charm, of course... Xavier sighed, "Remy...You...You are a very bright, young man. I have known you and watched you grow through the years...I think you're setting yourself up for failure. You try too hard..." Remy looked like he was about to protest, but Xavier held up a hand, "Quiet..let me finish." When Remy settled down, Charles continued, "You try too hard. I've noticed you doing everything in your power to make others happy...even now...when most of them seem to dislike you...You're still trying too hard to get back into their good graces. I want you to stop. Don't listen to them. You are the only person that can judge you. You are the only person that really matters, Remy. Don't worry about what their wants and needs are...think about yourself. I know I'm blatantly advocating selfishness, but go ahead. After all the hell those people put you through...Stand up and say no. Do your own thing..."



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Do your own thing...that was the professor's suggestion. Remy sighed, flicking the ashes from his cigarette. He sat out back of the boat house, on the dock...in one of those fancy lawn chairs... He had his cellphone in his lap, earbuds in his ears...He'd downloaded a metric shit ton of sappy songs...like..Anna Nalick, Missy Higgins, Josh Groban...Stuff like that. But the one song that got him...was Run by Snow Patrol.... He played that song over and over again, closing his eyes.



It didn't really pertain to his current situation, but it made him feel better. The song flowed and calmed him... It was sad... If you listened, really listened to the lyrics. It was an incredibly sad song. But at the same time, it made you feel so much better.



~I'll sing it one last time for you

Then we really have to go

You've been the only thing that's right

In all I've done



And I can barely look at you

But every single time I do

I know we'll make it anywhere

Away from here



Light up, light up

As if you have a choice

Even if you cannot hear my voice

I'll be right beside you dear



Louder louder

And we'll run for our lives

I can hardly speak I understand

Why you can't raise your voice to say



To think I might not see those eyes

Makes it so hard not to cry

And as we say our long goodbye

I nearly do



Light up, light up

As if you have a choice

Even if you cannot hear my voice

I'll be right beside you dear



Louder louder

And we'll run for our lives

I can hardly speak I understand

Why you can't raise your voice to say



Slower Slower

We don't have time for that

All i want is to find an easier way

To get out of our little heads



Have heart my dear

We're bound to be afraid

Even if it's just for a few days

Making up for all this mess



Light up, light up

As if you have a choice

Even if you cannot hear my voice

I'll be right beside you dear...*******~





And so he sat...Listening to Run over and over. And over and over again. He wasn't aware someone was watching him until the next song started to play. It was a fun song. She Wolf. He smirked and started grooving to the song a little bit...that's when he heard the snort.



There stood...Bobby Drake. He was smiling at Remy, just standing there watching the man be goofy for a moment.



The Iceman sat down next to Remy, then leaned over and kissed his cheek, "How ya feelin'? I saw ya comin' out of the old guy's office."



Remy sighed softly, "M'alright. Will probably feel a lil better once I'm able t' log onto de game n' kill a few Q's. Did you know...I was in some group wit' another brig n' dis brig...man, she was geared to de nines...She left de fuckin' group cuz I out parsed her. She said she couldn' understand how a gimp ass brig like me could do dat. N' Agamo told her to fuck off n' kicked her outta de group..N' now I got dis guild...Apollo on m' ass, wantin' me t' leave FTA...."*



Now, a normal person wouldn't know what the fuck Remy just said. Bobby did though. He nodded and sighed, "Lemme guess...Dyscordia?"



Remy nodded and huffed, "Fuckin' bitch. I am not some gimp. I have all m' TSO PVP gear...m' epic. Ain' had a chance t' finish de myth quest yet...got most o' my T8 masters...Got 182 AA...I'm fuckin' pimp, homme...FUckin' P I M P."



Bobby giggled, then covered his mouth. He calmed and leaned over, resting his head on Remy's shoulder, "It's just a game babe..."



Remy sighed, "I know..but still. It's about de only part of my life dat's worth while..."



Bobby pulled away and glared at him, "Hey! What about me? I'm not worth while?"



"Cher...I didn' mean it like dat."



"Of course not. I'm just some fuck to you." Bobby stood up and glared at the Cajun, "When are you gonna say it? Huh? I've told you I loved you so many times...and you have yet to say it back to me! What are you afraid of? I love you, Remy. I'm not gonna hurt you. You can trust me...Please..just...just...give me a chance..."



Remy looked up at his lover and sighed, "I'm...I'm not ready...f' dat, Bobby. Just gimme a lil more time..."



"I've given you two fuckin' years, Remy...I've...I've shared your bed...shared parts of myself I...I don't normally with others...that I can't share with others...I've..I've given you my whole heart...God, Remy...You're a fucking empath! Can't you like...scan my mind to find out how I feel about you?!"



Remy ran a hand through his hair and looked down, then sat forward, "Bobby...I...Look, I'm..just in a funk right now. Give me time, okay?"



Bobby shook his head and started walking off. He stopped and turned to look back at Remy, "I'm not gonna wait forever, Cajun. Figure it the fuck out, then come talk to me..." He stormed off...leaving Remy to stare after him...



Remy sat back and watched Bobby walk back to the mansion. He fucked up everything. No matter how hard he tried...he still screwed up. In a fit, He stood and chucked his cell phone, earbuds and all, into the pond, then kicked the chair. He turned toward the house and shouted, "Fuck you!"



Huffing, he stormed into the boat house...Time to hit the bottle....



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Author's note:

*This is gonna be kinda hard to explain, but it's something that happened to me. Only, I'm not a brig, I'm a ranger. Now...as for what parse is...that's a guage to show how much damage/heals everyone is doing the group. It's a third party program called Advanced Combat Tracker. Now, according to that, my ranger does an average of 3-7000 DPS (Damage Per Second). This other ranger that was in the group...man, she had me outgeared by a mile. I felt like a complete newb next to her...but she didn't have any idea how to play her toon..and thusly, she got mad because my gimpass ranger was out-DPSing her. Long story short...She sucked. I rule. Hah.



If you require further explanation...feel free to email me or ask in feedback.





TBC


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******: Song belongs to Snow Patrol, it's called Run, and it's off their Final Straw album.