Finding A Way Around Pride

First of all:

Baebin thank you for your review! Yes, I am setting the stage for that – when it comes to Jean’s character I really let my nice side go. I’ve been reading at AFF for a few years and the lack of Logan/Marie fics makes me really sad. I’ve also tried to take a different approach to Logan/Marie, one that seems more realistic for them. I try as hard as possible to keep characters IN character. I can’t stand OOC. Thanks again! You’ve set me on a Chapter 3 war path!

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Jean’s arrival home was chaotic – at least in an emotional sense. There were many tears of joy, though none were shed by Jean herself. She just smiled serenely at everyone. After being ushered through the crowd of students into the Professor’s office, the X-Men sighed in relief. The Professor’s face lit up at the sight of his old student and he wheeled around the desk to embrace her as a father would. His eyes were watery but the tears did not run over. With her hands in his he gazed up at her then invited them all to sit.

“My dearest Jean,” Xavier began with a smile, “I know it is soon after your ordeal, but I must admit my curiosity as to your survival. Would you mind telling your story?”

Jean appeared to think for a moment then shook her head. “I don’t really remember…Once the water crashed over me, I remember spinning and tumbling in the water and then … black. When I woke up I was laying on the inlet but wasn’t able to move, it was like my body was heavy and hot.” She explained in a confused manner.

The X-Men didn’t understand – couldn’t understand, but they were ecstatic none the less. The Professor knew that it was unethical of him to search her mind for possible answers and knew it went against his own morals but this whole situation was just too astounding. Her short explanation seemed lacking and half-hearted but never would he think that she was lying to them. When he reached out tentatively into her mind he recoiled with a fiery shock, momentarily paralyzed mentally and physically. When sensation came back to him in a painful tingling wave, he realized that he had been refused entrance by a barrier around her mind. He had encountered her mental wall before during their many years together but never had it consisted of such violent intensity before.

Conversation flowed around him but he was deep in his mind, thinking and working through his confusion. He had sensed a change in her when she had walked into the room, even noticed it when she had come within the grounds’ entrance. It was palpable. It felt…malicious. He wanted to disregard it and welcome back his golden girl. Now, though, he didn’t think that looking over this new development would be beneficial. He needed to get to the bottom of this, wanted to dive right in and demand to know what happened and what was going on. Wait, he told himself. Rushing into things would not help and could put Jean on the defensive. He decided to let time progress and see where she was headed – emotionally and mentally. Xavier hoped that this was just a phase she was going through after ‘coming back to life’, growing into herself again.

Cyclops seemed fidgety and eager to leave with his significant other, eager to restart their life. Everyone in the room noticed and were hiding smiles behind their hands or just smiling outwardly; everyone except Wolverine. He looked hungry for Jean, his attitude fueled by his hope that Jean may see things differently after her near death experience. The entire time since they had reunited with Jean at the lake he had been on edge. Everyone felt that the air around him was electric and thick with arousal, desire. They also felt his rivalry towards Cyclops like something you would expect a savage animal to feel, not a human. Though, the Wolverine was not fully human. Cyclops knew these feelings and felt hot and on his toes ever since leaving Alkali Lake. Xavier was not oblivious to these feelings of conflict between the two either and motioned for them to stand. He was hoping that Cyclops could pull Jean out of her dark feelings; if anyone could coax someone into a positive frame of mind it was the logical, yet gentle, leader of the X-Men.

“Well Jean, although we are all reeling from the past few hours it is undoubtedly one of the best days of our lives.” He told her, eyes twinkling and reached out to take her hands again. With a squeeze filled with emotions he directed them to go on with their days. Many of the X-Men wanted to catch up with Jean but Ororo, Beast and Nightcrawler effectively – and silently – detoured people away. They knew Scott’s wishes and they were just as happy for their leader as they were for Jean. Wolverine watched with fiery eyes as Cyclops pulled Jean along behind him up the grand staircase. His gaze was cut off by the couple’s bedroom door closing. A visible tremor ran the course of his body as he stood at the base of the steps, glaring up after the pair with fisted hands pressed into his legs. It was obvious he was keeping a tight reign on himself, forcing his body to stay in place and not race upstairs to kick the door down and shred Cyclops to bloody ribbons.

Even Wolverine felt something like surprise towards his feelings. He had always coveted Jean and longed for her to warm his bed and body, but never like this. His feelings for Cyclops were less than brotherly – they weren’t even friendly – but he had always held an inkling of respect for him. Never had he actually been serious when contemplating ripping him apart. Ever since he had put Jean down after that first embrace it was as if all the rage in him had been blown to a fiery fury. He knew that he had a short temper and was quick to solve things with a fist or claw but even he would admit these feelings did not belong to him. His familiarity with anger seemed to enable him to give into these emotions easily, though. Wolverine blamed this all on the time passed from Jean’s death to her rebirth – absence makes the heart grow stronger, they always say. With a snarl towards the couple’s room he turned on his heel and beat a path through anyone standing in his way towards the training rooms. Maybe his damned healing ability would pity him for once and he could work himself into exhaustion so he wouldn’t feel these things for a while.

Upstairs there was no hesitation to reconnect between the two lovers. Once the latch on the door clicked into place Scott immediately took Jean into his arms and their lips connected. He proceeded to welcome her home sweetly and gently, his hands refreshing themselves with the memory of her body. They cupped her face, soft and warm, and flowed down her back. When he reached her waist he gently took hold of her and led her to their bed, now dressed in fresh linens. Once the back of her knees hit the edge of the bed she seemed to come alive in his arms, as if someone had plugged her in. He felt her hot shiver of excitement and her uniform – she had been found in the uniform she wore to her death – peeled itself off of her. Scott reeled in awe of the beauty before him and wouldn’t have been surprised if he climaxed all over the inside of his pants at the mere sight of her. He pulled the hem of his shirt up over his head and reached for her, his mouth coming down on hers again in a kiss of long awaited passion.

Jean slid her arms around him and he felt as if he’d been branded, letting out of breath of a moan into her mouth and dropping his arms to caress her backside. This seemed to be a signal for her and she divested him of his pants, impatiently yanking them off of his hips and pulling him down onto the bed. He tried to take her slowly, tried to stoke the fires of passion in her but they seemed to be burning hot enough for her already. She forced her way through all of his gentle touching and loving kisses, pulling his face down to hers and claiming his mouth. Scott didn’t recognize her response and actions – they were usually so caring and slow when it came to making love. He figured she had just missed him so much that she wasn’t even herself and the thought made his heart soar. So even though he ended up taking her hard and quickly, the fact that she enjoyed it made him almost enjoy it just as much. After this, he thought as he rolled off of her twenty minutes later, they would go back to gentle love making, just the way they always did.

A few days later Ororo entered one of the training rooms to see Scott sitting on the floor, his back against the wall. He was sweating and red in the face, as if he had overworked himself. He looked distraught.

“How is everything with Jean?” the weather witch asked him straight out, taking a seat in front of him. She had seen Scott’s emotions change over the past couple of days. For the first and second day he was floating on a cloud – nothing could bring him down, not even the fact that Wolverine was either one step ahead of where Jean would be or following one step behind. The lusty X-Man would be waiting in the kitchens in the morning to greet the red-haired beauty, watching her as she ate with Scott. She didn’t seem to mind in the least and ignored him after saying good morning. Wolverine could be found in various places throughout the mansion during the day, always encountering Jean - who was always with Scott. He never touched her and never spoke to Scott, but acted as if he wasn’t there. It irritated Scott but he let it go because Jean obviously hadn’t changed her mind when it came to who she preferred.

“Fine.” He told her, then faltered at her look and sighed, running a hand over his sweaty face, “Does she seem…different, to you Ororo?”

She didn’t answer him right away. Yes, her friend did seem strange to her. She barely spoke to anyone and when she did it was either in a calm, relaxed manner or an irritated one. The area around her always felt charged, like she was extending her power to touch everyone as they walked by. It didn’t feel innocent either. The looks in her eyes didn’t help to disprove this feeling. They appeared to be darker and filled with things like hate, disgust and haughty disregard. Most of the time, though, she just looked like she was waiting. For what, Ororo couldn’t know. Jean talked to her sparingly, nothing like before her death.

“Yes. Yes, she does. Have you asked her about it?” she questioned.

“I have, but she doesn’t say much. Just that she feels like she’s missed out on so much and it overwhelms her. She says she’s trying to get back in touch with herself.” He told her with a shrug; this and various different versions of this, were all she answered with. “We don’t have conversations about anything other than what’s been going on with the world and mutants and the like. Nothing about us and-“

Ororo raised an eyebrow as he stopped, his face turning a deeper shade of red along his cheek bones.

“Its not like it was before - making love. Before it was gentle and slow, actually love making. Now she wants it rough and fast…she gets impatient and irritated with me when I try to do it like we used to. She doesn’t like it when I even touch her outside of the bedroom. I try to hold her hand or touch her hair and she pulls away from me as if I annoy her.” He blurted out, he head and shoulders bowed. Ororo wasn’t surprised by this news. She had known everything about their life behind closed doors before Jean's "death" because Jean would tell her. They used to be so close. The person Jean was now, though, did not seem like a woman who wanted to be loved in bed. “Fucking Wolverine isn’t helping either. Always around and talking to Jean like she belongs to him. She responds to him now, too. I catch her looking at him and she doesn’t even look guilty.”

She most certainly was responding to him now. Instead of ignoring him staring at her she would look up and say something smart. Today she had asked him if she could help him, but it wasn’t sarcastic like it normally would have been. It was like an invitation but Scott couldn’t discern her facial expression because her eyes were hooded. He knew that Logan took this as encouragement – he had been absolutely stalker-like since yesterday. This was closer to being correct than Scott knew because Logan was doing just that: stalking his prey. Unbeknownst to Scott, Logan could smell her arousal as of late. He knew she was coming around; he was so close to getting what he’d wanted so badly. Finally, he’d win Jean over and they’d be so busy bringing down the house around them he would barely have time to rub it in Scooter’s face. It was only what he deserved, having done the same to Logan many times. His shoulders moved with suppressed laughter every time Scott tried to pull Jean out of the room or tell Logan to ‘Fuck off.’ He was becoming more and more frantic every time Jean would speak to him or even make eye contact.

“I don’t know what to do, Ororo. I’m worried about…how she feels towards me – and Logan. What if she really has changed her mind?” he asked her with the eyes of a dying man. He seemed haggard and everything about him screamed defeat.

Ororo didn’t know how to answer him, though. The Jean he loved seemed to be gone. This Jean they had saved from the lake was someone else entirely. She didn’t laugh and her eyes didn’t sparkle like they had before. She didn’t seem to be interested in spending time with her best friend and hadn’t even touched on the subject about teaching again. The students didn’t converge around her and bask in her attentions; they avoided her now after the first few failed attempts at interaction. How was Ororo supposed to tell him this, though? How would she help break his heart? She knew that, while logical and realistic, when it came to Jean he wouldn’t think with his brain. It would be with his heart and his heart wouldn’t be able to let go of it’s long-time love. She had also seen the increasing attention to Wolverine from Jean, too. If Jean had done as Wolverine predicted and ‘seen the light’, conflict would erupt between the two men like a young mutant’s power freshly unleashed. Oh, what would she do?

She would be logical, like Scott, and hope he would appreciate her straightforwardness later.

“Scott, she is not your Jean anymore. This person she has been reborn as…it is not the Jean Grey we all love. You can not retain the hope that she will come around. In less than a week she has already proven to be a mirror of her former self. You need to let go of her. Mourn for the old Jean, but not for the loss of this strange person.” She said softly, her voice breaking several times.

If Scott didn’t have to wear the quartz glasses she would have been able to see what affect this had on him. Had she been able to, she wouldn’t have been startled in falling back on her elbows when Scott bound up onto his feet and towered over her in a threatening manner. His chest rose and fell rapidly with loud gasping breaths. She wouldn’t have been surprised if those fisted hands tried to take out whatever feelings she had evoked in him on her. Scott was her friend, but she wouldn’t lay there and let him pummel her because she felt sorry for speaking the truth.

“She’s just overwhelmed! She still loves me and I won’t give up on her! You can judge her all you want Ororo, but I’ll be there when she comes around. Because she will!” he bellowed, spit flying from his mouth.

He stepped over her and left the room, the door cracking down the middle when he slammed it. Her sigh permeated the uneasy silence as she stood and brushed her colorless hair out of her face. The X-Men had other things to focus on besides the disintegrating love between their leaders. Magneto and the Brotherhood hadn’t made an appearance yet in response to the new mutant ‘cure’, which meant they were planning something. They also hadn’t heard from Rogue yet and the end of the week was nearly upon them. Xavier didn’t seem as caught up in Jean’s reappearance as she had expected him to be, so maybe he had not forgotten the deal they had reached concerning the young woman. Ororo hoped that the Professor saw these changes in Jean as well and was maintaining his distance. She knew he was not someone to rush into things and hung onto the thought that he was biding his time until coming to a conclusion about the fiery telepath. She needed to talk to him about the new developments in Jean’s behavior and where they could lead. Now, before things got too much out of hand. Sentiments between humans and mutants were growing too heated for them to be undisciplined and out of focus. Storm followed Cyclops’ path out of the room but changed course to the Professor’s office.