Bring Me to Life

On Warren's first mission with the team, Liv's first efforts at coordinating a mission, everything went wrong. She couldn't help but feel that maybe it was her fault.

Liv pushed her way into the medlab, past a protesting Jean Gray and ncerncerned Hank. "What the hell happened?" Before either of the doctors could answer she saw him, laid out on a table. His body was only slightly warmer than the metal gurney he was on. "He's lost a lot of blood," she said numbly. She was vaguely aware of Logan on another table; he'd lost blood, too, more than Warren, but the Wolverine's healing powers guaranteed that a life-threatening wound for someone else wasn't so bad for him.

Hank laid a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Despite Jean's protests, I believe that maybe you should see exactly what happened to him." He led her over to the bed, quietly explaining what had gone wrong with the mission. "The team was aiding the Morlocks in escaping Sinister and his Marauders, as you know from briefings. They managed to flee but Warren was caught by Harpoon's javelins, thepalepaled both his wings."

Liv shuddered, letting Hank guide her hand to Warren's body. Once she had a grip on him she pulled off her glove, searching for his bare hand; when she found it, the images she got were almost overwhelming, all the pain he had suffered hitting her forcefully.

"Get her out of here, Hank," Jean crabbed, only to be glared at by the furry blue doctor.

"You said yourself that you don't think Warren stands a good chance of living," Hank shot back, reaching out to steady Liv with a hand. "And if that's true, then it's not harming him any for her to be here. She needs this."

Liv choked back a sob, her other now-bare hand going to touch Warren's face. "I'm so sorry," she whispered, stroking his cheek. "God, Warren…" She closed her eyes and let her mind see the damage; his wings were bloody, the white feathers stained pink in patches around the wounds. The injuries themselves were like a black hole in his aura. "Hank, you need to save him."

"I don't know if we can, Liv. He's lost a lot of blood."

"Amputate the wings," she said softly, turning away from Warren at last. She was asking Hank to remove one of the things that gave Warren the most joy. "He'll live if you do that. He'll die if you don't."

Hank nodded. "I believe you're right, my dear. Jean? Prepare for surgery." He guided Liv out to the waiting area. "You'll have to remain here; I'll let you in when everything is over."

Liv nodded, curling up on a chair to sob out the pain. She knew that Warren would be good as dead without his wings. They were a part of him, like a vital organ that would kill him if they were ever removed. But she couldn't bear to lose him, not this way.

She absently registered Scott's presence a few hours later, after he'd gotten cleaned up and debriefed the Professor on the mission. He didn't say anything, instead holding her even when she stopped crying. And he left without ever speaking; there wasn't anything he could say.

Hank came out a few hours later, his face grim. "He's awake, Liv, but he doesn't want to see you."

She looked at him, shock her first reaction until reality set in. "I understand." A small, cynical smile twisted her lips. "Thank you, Hank." And she walked out.


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~


Her bag was packed and sitting her on her bed; she really didn't remember gathering her clothes, and before she was really aware she was down the stairs and into the garage. Logan was leaning against the SUV he knew she'd take.

"Going somewhere?"

"How is that any of your business?" Liv was surprised at the venom in her voice, but she couldn't bring herself to apologize. She was falling apart inside and needed to be as far away from the Institute as possible, as fast as possible.

Logan uncrossed his arms from across his chest. "You can't run when things get hard, Liv. Otherwise you'll always be runnin', without ever knowing what you've passed by."

She blinked behind her sunglasses. "Running has worked before."

"You were scared then, I understand that." He took a step towards her but didn't touch her. "And I know you're upset now, but what is leaving going to accomplish? The mission wasn't your fault, it wasn't Warren's fault, it wasn't anyone's fault."

"I need to be away for a while. I need to be somewhere where people are days away from me." She blinked again, surprised to find tears stinging her eyes. "I need to be somewhere where people can't hurt me."

"Then you'll want the keys to the cabin, I suppose." Professor Xavier's smooth voice exuded calm as he wheeled into the garage behind her, which meant he was mentally exuding it as well. He had the keys in his hand.

Liv nodded. "Thank you, Professor. Are you going to lecture me about running away?" There was no anger in her voice, just defeat.

Xavier shook his head. "I trust you, Liv. I know you're grieving right now, and that you grieve by being alone. I trust you to come back to us when you are ready."

She exhaled and took the keys he offered her. "Thank you." She turned to Logan, who was blocking her path to the vehicle. "Please, Logan."

He growled, then moved. "Don't do anything stupid, Liv. Pl pro promise me you won't."

"I … I won't. I'll be careful." She was shocked to the core; Logan had never expressed any emotion to her beyond what he let anyone else see, and to hear real fear in his voice scared her. "I promise, I'll be careful."

Tension visibly leaked out of him, the red in his aura softening, and he reached out to hug her before she could protest; oddly, she didn't feel like being angry anymore, especially at him. He'd never done anything to harm. He. He'd always helped her.

"Be safe," he told her as he let go and loped off.