Forever

FOREVER--CHAPTER 30
(NC-17)

 

A/N Tons of thanks
to Foxfeather for reading all of this and keeping Kurt from sounding like an
idiot and more thanks to InterNutter for letting use her idea! Go check out
there stuff. Go on. Go…Wait! Read this first, then go read their stuff!

Thanks to all those
who reviewed--when this is done, look for the follow up (I hesitate to call it
a sequel). I'll let y'all know what the title is when I start writing it…
lol. Anyway, you guys and gals and
whichever are wonderful and make me all melty inside… J lol.

 



  Amara felt numb. She watched as the nurse pulled the IV out
of her arm, pressing a pad of cotton to the bead of blood that rose to the
surface. Shouldn’t I feel that? The nurse paused and eyed the old scars
crossing Amara’s bracelets of fortune[1],
making “tsk” noises and patting a bandage over the cotton pad. The nurse moved to the other side of the bed
and dropped the railing, reaching to remove the electrodes attached to Amara’s
chest, feeding information into the monitors over her head. There was a slight, sticky ripping noise as
the pads were pulled free and the nurse checked Amara’s
expression—nothing. Dimly, Amara
realized that she should express some discomfort and willed a tear to trickle
from her left eye. Useful trick—gets
Daddy to let you have a personal servant, makes nurses stop checking your
pulse…Sure enough, the nurse crooned sympathetically and patted Amara on
the head. Lance hovered in the
background, straining to catch Amara’s eye over the top of the nurse’s head,
but the girl acted as if she did not see him.
The nurse dabbed a little rubbing alcohol on the sticky residue left by
the electrodes, dissolving most of the glue, then murmured some soothing
comments before leaving the two teenagers alone Amara sank back into the thin pillows provided by the hospital
and let her eyes flutter shut, the image of an ancient fountain ringed by
verdant plants playing against her lids. I miss home…Two weeks ago, hell, two days ago, she never would
have let that thought bubble through to her forebrain but now, Nova Roma was
all she could think about. I can
never go back…not ever. I’m tainted. Lance was talking to her, she realized, but
she could not understand what he was saying.
Instead, she was quickly becoming lost in home, smelling the rich
incense of hot terra cotta and flowered paths, feeling the cool tile of the
baths beneath her feet and hearing the faint ringing of temple bells, ringing
through the arched windows of her quarters.
She was not aware of it, but a faint smile was playing over her lips,
transforming her face from tired and gray to something wonderful for Lance to
behold. Amara tuned out the hospital
noises, not even noticing that Lance fell silent when he took her hand. Nova Roma…Nova Roma….I could stand the
pain there. Little cuts so tiny I could
say the cat did it. No one asked why
they were so deep. Oops, an accident
with a blade and Amara needs a bandage…. I don’t think the scars will show but
wear this cuff just in case. Tiny
pieces of skin in an offering and no one objects. Tiny pieces of skin on my floor and everyone cries and
screams. I need to feel alive
again…Pain is sweet and forgiving. Pain
cleanses me. Amara opened her eyes
and felt a new wash of sadness, seeing not Nova Roma but the bleak walls of
Bayville General Hospital. Lance was
arguing with someone and she found that she did not have enough energy to turn
her head and see who it was.

“I’m coming with her.”

“Lance, I think you need to go
rest. Kitty says you were here all
night.” The Professor’s voice was kind,
which surprised Lance. He had expected
the man to yell at him, rage at the Brotherhood. Instead, Professor Xavier just seemed tired and sad.

“I promised her that I wouldn’t
leave her.” Lance was nearly asleep on
his feet but he was clinging to the random promise he had made Amara. I make and break promises all the
time. Why the Hell is this one so
damned important to me? I want to go
but I can’t… Lance sat obstinately
on the side of Amara’s bed, clasping her hand gently between his two much
larger ones. He jerked his chin in a
gesture of defiance, daring the Professor and Storm to move him.

The Professor looked at Amara
briefly, eyes flickering with known secrets, before saying slowly to Lance,
“I’m afraid Amara may not be quite…coherent…enough to realize who is with her,
much less where she is.” The wall of
pain and self-hatred that assailed him when he flitted into Amara’s mind made
the Professor shake inside.

Lance felt physical pain at the
thought that Amara might not realize he was there, actually keeping his promise
to her. “But…”

Storm held out her hand,
palm-up, in a gesture of supplication.
“Lance, please…it’s all we can do to get the hospital to release her to
our care. Please just go home and
rest. Find…who did this…if it makes you
feel better. “ The glance that Storm
exchanged with the Professor showed Lance that she already knew who did
it. “When Amara is feeling more
herself, we will discuss visitation.”
Her tone brooked no argument.

Lance’s jorkeorked furiously, fighting back the arguments that rose
naturally to his mind. After a moment,
he let out a long breath through his nose and said “Fine. Fine.
That’s how you want to play it.”
Standing but still holding on to Amara’s hand, he leaned close to her
ear. “I have to go now, Princess, but
I’ll see you soon, okay?” Amara merely
blinked, her smile gone and a blank expression firmly fixed on her face. Lance let out a shaky sigh and, shifting so
that the older mutants could not see his face, he murmured “I know you don’t
want to hear this, but I do care about you.
Fuck Kitty and Scott. We’re
what’s right… I’ll get Boom Boom, Princess.
I’ll get her for you.” He
dropped a quick but heartfelt kiss on her cheek near her ear and straightened,
releasing her hand and turning stiffly to face Professor Xavier and Storm. “I’ll be over to see her soon. I’ll…hell, I don’t know what I’ll do, but
I’ll be over.” Lance shouldered past
them, mustering as much dignity as he could wearing his piecemeal outfit of
scrub-top, dirty jeans, and hospital slippers.
Storm and the Professor exchanged long looks, each knowing exactly what
the other was thinking without the aide of telepathy: What the Hell is he up
to?

Kurt stirred his soggy cereal blearily.
Pressing tiny marshmallows down into the now-pink milk, Kurt found that
he was not that hungry anymore. No
sleep, sexually frustrated, my mother’s in a tizzy, and today is D-Day. Fuck.
I may ‘port myself into another dimension and stay there if today gets
any worse. The sun had only been up
an hour and Storm and the Professor had just left, so Kurt was effectively
alone in the mansion. Everyone was
asleep or, in the case of Scott, working out in the Danger Room. So quiet…for once it’s quiet and I want
noise. Where’s Jubilee when you need her? Deciding that three was definitely not the
charm when it came to Rainbow Fruit Flakes (now with marshmallows!)[2],
Kurt rinsed his bowl and spoon, putting them in the dishwasher. The sound of footsteps on the stairs made him
freeze, realizing just who those steps belonged to. Katzchen! Here, Kitty,
Kitty, Kitty…His body already tightening in response to her very presence,
Kurt hurried towards the staircase to meet her. His mother’s voice drifting down from the second story made him
freeze in his tracks, though.

“Kitty?” Astrid yawned around the name.

“Oh…I’m sorry! Did I wake you?” Kitty was clad in black sweatpants and an old, thin tank top
emblazoned with the words “Hello, Kitty!”[3],
her feet bare and hair scraped into top knot.


“No, no—I really
could not sleep anyway. Um. I was
wondering…where are you going? Kurt
isn’t in his room and, well…” Astrid
shrugged, motherly concern evident.

“He’s not? Huh.
Well, I was just going to go do some yoga and…stuff… You know, release
tension before this meeting.” Kurt’s
lips pressed together in sympathy. He,
too, was tied up in knots from a combination of sheer terror and sexual desire;
he could imagine that Kitty was in a similar state.

“Yoga? I’ve always wanted to try that…not many
classes where I am, though…”

“I imagine it’d be
hard to take any sort of class if you’re so busy performing.” Kitty chuckled along with Astrid, Kurt
joining them silently in his dark corner, just out of sight in the rec
room. “If you like, you could come
with me and I’ll show you some basic stuff.”
Kitty chewed her lower lip nervously.
Kurt knew that she was still a little afraid of his mother and offering
to share her morning yoga with Astrid was a huge leap of faith for Kitty. His insides turned further to jelly when
Astrid readily agreed to Kitty’s offer.
“Well, put on some comfortable clothes and I’ll wait here for you.” Astrid disappeared into her room and Kitty
sat on the bottom step, resting her chin in her hands and humming softly to
herself.

“Katzchen…”

“Yah!” Kitty jumped to her feet, hands flying into
a defensive position before she realize who it was. “Kurt! Sorry, babe, too
tired to catch on!” She offered him her
brightest possible smile considering it was barely six in the morning and Kurt
crossed the distance in two giant steps.


“Katzchen…you were
in my room last night.” He pulled her
flush against his body, arousal obvious, and nuzzled her ear.

“Kurt! Oh, my God! Astrid…”

“Is going to be a
while. I lived with her almost my
entire life. It takes her at least
twenty minutes to get ready…” Kurt
captured her earlobe between his teeth and suckled there, his arms tightening
around Kitty when her knees went weak.

“How’d you know I
was in your room?” Her words were
broken by gasps as Kurt found the sensitive spot at the nape of her neck that
made her quake like an autumn lead.

“I smelled you
there…” His voice was thick and low
now, making Kitty clench her fists in an effort to stay upright and not throw
him down to the floor and have her way with him there and then. “Kitty, you’re very…”

“Kurti! You’re
up!” Astrid’s voice drifted down the
stairs, acting as a bucket of cold water over the teenagers.

‘Guten Morgen,
Mama.” Kurt flushed beneath his fur and
Kitty was nearly purple with embarrassment.
Stepping a decorous distance away from his girlfriend but still holding
tight to her hand, Kurt smiled at his mother.
“Sleep well?”

“Eh. Not really…Kitty is going to show me some
yoga. Maybe this old woman will relax
enough to keep from…violence against certain people, ja?” Astrid smiled thinly and Kitty forced a
chuckle. Kurt merely kept his smile
plastered and nodded.

“So…let’s go to the
gym. There’s a lot of open space where
we can spread out.” Kitty tugged away
from Kurt and offered him wide, heated eyes, her desire evident in the
glance. The look was clear: No
matter what happens, later we’ll finish this! Astrid gave Kurt the fish eye[4]
as she passed, letting Kurt know that she had seen just what he had been up
to. The urge to follow the women was
strong, but Kurt knew that there was no way that he could enjoy watching Kitty
bend and twist and stretch if his mother was doing it right along side
her. The romance is gone from my
life before it was ever properly in it![5]
Kurt shook his head ruefully, know that it was self-pity that made him say
that, and decided to go join Scott in the Danger Room. Maybe hitting something will help…

Jean watched Scott from the
control room, her thoughts for once in a whirl. I kissed him. Not the
other way around. If I’m going to be
mad at anyone, it has to be myself. But
I’m not….I wanted to kiss him, I almost needed to kiss him. Scott was busily, almost angrily blasting
obstacles and projectiles out of his way, running a sim he knew like the back
of his hand. He’s affected—look at
him! He’s not even trying! He could run this one in his sleep! Jean nearly went down to talk to him then,
even if it was just to razz him about running a simple program, when Scott
paused the program and keyed the door open.
Huh? I didn’t hear the alarm
go off…oh. Volume… Kurt had joined Scott in the room and the
two were already talking by the time Jean found the volume control.

“…on my lower lip…”

“Vas? She kissed you?
Never would have guessed…” Kurt shook his head mockingly and ducked as
Scott sent a good-natured punch his way.
“C’mon, mein Freund! I’m just
teasing you!”

“I know, I know…It’s just…” Scott looked vaguely around and Jean almost
hid until she realized that he could not see her from his vantage point, much
less through the mirrored glass of the window.
“I just want it to be real so badly… She can read minds, damn it, but
she doesn’t believe that I love her. I
almost asked her to scan me just to prove it to her.” He sounded guilty, tugging a little at Jean’s heartstrings.

“Unrequited love…I understand that!” Kurt sat against the wall and Scott joined
him, forming an odd tableau in the room: objects were frozen mid-trajectory,
the boys the only moving things in the whole of the Danger Room. “So what’re you going to say?”

“To Jean? Nothing, I guess. It’s what she wants.”

“And you’ll always do what she
wants…” Kurt made a sound like a whip cracking and let out a loud “Meeeeow![6]” Scott snorted before bursting into
laughter.

“You’re one to talk…The name
Kitty sound familiar?” Kurt whacked him
on the shoulder before chuckling.

“Point, point…” Kurt sighed sadly now and Jean leaned closer
to the window, fighting the strong urge to read him, to find out what he was
thinking about Scott and herself.

“Look, man, today’s gonna be
rough…”

“I know. They won’t be here until after one, so until
then…”

“You’re twisting in the
wind?” Kurt nodded in agreement. “Want to run a sim?”

“Not anymore…I think I want to
try and get some sleep.”

“Try…heh. I know that feeling.”

“Jean keeping you up nights?”

“You could say that…” The two shared some very male laughter and
Jean shut off the volume, a little disturbed by the slight ribald turn of the
conversation. Kurt lingered only a few
moments before leaving Scott alone in the room. He closed his eyes and took off his glasses, rubbing his lids in
consternation.

Jean pressed her lips together, remembering the feel of their kiss. Just
one more time couldn’t hurt, could it?
Just to test the waters…Important to know your mind before making it up,
so says Professor Xavier… Okay. Here goes nothing. Flipping on the intercom, Jean spoke,
“Scott? You still running the sim?”

Scott jumped and
slid his glasses back on, turning around once before his eyes lit on the
intercom box below the control room window.
“How long you been here?”

“Just got up
here. Saw the “occupied” light on so I
came up to see who was in here…So you running it or not?”

“Not. Coming down?” Jean noted that he sounded a little relieved.

“Yeah…just a
sec.” Scott was standing dead-center of
the room when she entered, his arms crossed defensively. “Something wrong?”

“No…yes…no…” He shook his head. “Just feeling a little confused.
Jean, why did you kiss me last night?”

“I wanted to. I wanted to see… to make sure. Scott, I have these feelings and onc once in
my life I don’t know what to think.”
Jean found that she was having trouble meeting Scott’s ruby gaze.

“So you just kissed
me as a test?”

“No! Well, not like you think,” Jean felt a
headache coming on and pressed her palms over her eyes, desperate to stave it
off. “Okay. The short of it is that I think that I have feelings for
you. Strong feelings. But I’m not sure how to handle them.”

Scott fairly hummed
with energy—Jean felt it rolling off of him in waves. “Really? You mean
it?” His voice cracked with giddy
pleasure but his arms were still crossed, albeit tighter, across his
chest. “What does this mean, then?”

“It means that I
still have some thinking to do and I would…I would like some help in the
decision making process.”

“You know what my
decision would be, what I would want yours to be as well.”

“That’s not the
kind of help that I meant.” For the
second time in less than twenty-four hours, Jean surprised the Hell out of
Scott. The distance vanished between them and she pressed her lips over his. His arms finally dropped and wrapped around
her waist, holding her close against him as she deepened the kiss. Her tentative sampling of the night before
soon became long, slow strokes of her tongue over his. He pulled away briefly to gasp for air only
to have her pull him back forcibly, mewling hungrily in his mouth. Scott groaned as her fingers sank into his
hair, carefully avoiding the earpieces of his glasses. His own hands drifted down her back to cup
her buttocks and she melted against him


I think I’ve
died and gone to Heaven. Or I have been
grossly misinformed about Hell…Scott felt as if he were floating then
realized that he could no longer feel the floor beneath his bare feet. Shit!
Jean is really into this!
She was levitating them without meaning to, a sure sign of her level of
distraction. He could tell when she
noticed their ascent because they jerked to a halt, like someone had slammed on
the brakes, and slowly drifted towards the ground as their kiss diminished in
intensity. When their feet were firmly
on the ground and their kiss broken, Scott murmured “Is that the kind of help
you needed?”

‘Oh, yeah…” Jean stepped away and smiled broadly. “I’ll let you know my answer later…” With that, she was gone, leaving Scott alone
again in the Danger Room. He touched
his hand to his mouth in wonder and grinned like an idiot, not caring that the
sim had just switched back on and he was being bludgeoned by little silver
balls…

“So corpse pose is really deceptive, then?”[7]
Astrid sipped the orange juice that Kitty handed her, waiting for a response.

“Yeah, but wasn’t it nice?” The
two women shared relaxed sighs and Kitty popped her back for added
emphasis. “Still a bundle of nerves,
but now I’m flexible..”

Astrid passed Kitty a plate of fruit salad and yogurt before tucking
into her own, and the two ate in silence for a while before it was broken by
Astrid’s strangled gasp. “Oh!”

“What is it?” Kitty swallowed
her food and turned to face the doorway, following Astrid’s gaze. There stood Mort Pryde, face purple in
anger, filling the doorway. “How did
you get in here?”

 

 

 



[1] Look at the
inside of your wrists, palms up. Those
lines across your wrists are your bracelets of fortune.

[2] Made
up. Just sounds like something all
sugary and nasty and something that Kurt would eat

[3] I know, I
know—been done before and much props to those who’ve used the device before
me. Just too cute to resist.

[4] Slang for a
knowing, assessing look.

[5] I’m a little
thief—directly from Margaret Mahy’s The Changeover. She is superfine and that book is sooooooo
good. Short, but good. Go, read, enjoy. Thank me later. J


[6] er, he’s
alluding to the term “pussy whipped” If
you don’t know what it means….well…find out.
lol.

[7] Really, it
is. It seems easy but it isn’t… It’s very relaxing, though.