Carne Vale

CARNE VALE CHAPTER THIRTY (NC-17)
Disclaimers Apply


A/N Goddess Foxfeather, Queen of Mad Plotbunnies, Tim has inspired Billy and Joaquin...you don't even want to know what the bunny tails are made from! InterNutter, TC and Maxwell Pink-may the computer gnomes stay far at bay in perpetuity... Readers/Reviewers: The Killer Kitties (tm) have been activated, so we're in for some peace and quiet on that front. The ducks, however, are now going a-viking. Seems they're Canadian and not going overseas at all...




"Where do you think you're going?" Logan's gruff voice cut through the silence of the corridor, making Kitty jump.
"Shit! I mean...oh!" she cried, startled beyond measure to be caught coming from the infirmary like a bat out of Hell. "I'm...going to the bathroom."
"There's one in there," he said with a hint of amust, st, standing as he was at the end of the hall, chewing on unl unlit cigar.
_Please don't smell me, please don't smell me... _ Kitty tittered nervously. "I just can't go with Kurt in there...it's embarrassing!"
"Hmmm..." Logan took several steps towards her and paused, sniffing deeply. A frown crossed his features and he said, "I'm in a real good mood, Half-Pint and I know that the Elf is in no shape to do anything serious, but I'm gonna tell you this one more time...no screwing around while under my watch, got it? If you do it when I'm not around, I don't want to find out in any way, shape or form."
Kitty nodded. "It's not his fault," she blurted. "He gave up sex for Lent!"
Logan closed his eyes. "Somehow, knowing that doesn't make smelling you any better." He retreated several paces and made a show of fiddling with his cigar. "You know why I like these things? The smoke covers up all sorts of things I don't want to know about..." He sighed and fixed Kitty with a hard look. "You aren't stupid, Half-Pint and I think you know you kids are about to go on lock down real soon here..."
"Because of that note Jubilee found," Kitty said mournfully. "I kind of figured...how bad?"
"Really bad. You guys are gonna have to walk the straight and narrow, no trouble here or at school, just to make sure anyone who goes poking their nose into places can't find anything against anyone. Past issues aside," he added, thinking the same thing Kitty was about all the problems of the past year. "Beast tells me you're helping his girlfriend out with her research."
"His girlfriend?" Kitty said, grinning at the change of subject as much as the topic. "Since when?"
"Since...I don't know," Logan shrugged. "I didn't ask."
"I am going to give you a list of questions to ask in different situations," Kitty sighed. "How long have you been dating, how big is the baby, when did they get a rce.rce... Men never ask these things!"
"You sound like Storm," he said, chuckling.
"Speaking of girlfriends..." she said slyly.
"Good night, Half-Pint...I'll sit with Kurt for awhile if it'll make ya feel better."
Kitty dithered, looking from the door to the infirmary to the hall past Logan and back again. "Okay," she said finally, knowing that if she went back in there, she would probably either climb back into the bed or feel compelled to tell Kurt what had happened asn asn as he emerged from his drug-induced sleep. "I'll come back in the morning to say goodbye to him before school..."
"You do that, Kitty," Logan said, grabbing her arm as she walked by and pulling her into a rough hug. Kitty stood stock-still for a moment, surprised because Logan was not one to show affection often and openly. "Just wanted to tell ya...I love ya."
"Me...me too," she stammered.
He released her and gave her an awkward smile. "Storm says I'm not affectionate enough," he said. "And I guess she's right...I don't think I've ever told you that I really care about you. And if anyone ever hurts you, I'll rip their balls off..."
Kitty felt her eyes widen and a horrified but amused smile touch her lips. "What if it's a girl that hurts me?"
Logan snorted. "I'll get 'em a sex change then rip their balls off. Go to bed, Kitty."
"Yes, sir!" She threw her arms around his neck in another hug and dashed down the hall before he stopped sputtering.

When she gother her room, she noticed her message light on her private line was blinking. Looking quickly at the clock, Kitty shrugged. It was only just ten o'clock and whoever called her either had a wrong number or was someone she really wanted to talk to, so she hit "Play" on the machine anstenstened as Tabby, sounding a little breathless and a lot out of sorts, asked her to call her 'whenever you get this...it's nine now, so I know you're not in bed!' _Damn it...wonder what's wrong? _ A brief, terrible memory of Amara's miscarriage came to mind. She had not seen the actual incident but she had heard it in great detail and knew from all her reading after the incident just how awful such a thing would be. She dialed Tabby's new number and bit her lip, letting her imagination run wild and chase off all traces of drowsiness.
"What?" an angry voice snapped on the other end of the line, lower than Tabby's and rougher.
"Um, Wanda? It's Kitty...Tabby called."
"Oh? Did she?" Wanda sounded like she was smiling, but Kitty did not want to know why. All she could see was the kiss she had witnessed on accident and felt a perverse need to ask if they had done anything else. "She probably wanted to freak out about what happened?"
"Is she okay?"
"Oh, yeah...*really* okay..." Wanda laughed lightly then. "She fell asleep about ten minutes ago. Want me to get her up?"
she she having trouble with the baby?" Kitty asked, relieved that Wanda did not throw out any more double entendre.
"Not that I know of..." She paused a long moment and said somewhat slowly, "I think I know what she wanted to talk about, though..."
"Really? What would that be?" _Am I sick for wanting to know details? _
Wanda snorted. "It isn't really any of your business if it's what I think it is and if it is, I sure as Hell ain't going to tell you..."
"Okay, then...tell her I called." Kitty was about to hang up when she heard Wanda calling her name through the receiver, an inch or so above the cradle. "Yeah?" she said, bringing the phone back to her ear.
"Tabby date much?"
"I don't think dating is the word I'd use...she is a bit more experienced than most," Kitty allowed, biting back the urge to add 'but not with women.'
"Hmmm. No relationships then?"
"Nothing meaningful, but I'm not the person to ask. Rogue, Lance, Todd or even Remy would know better than me..."
"Oh?" There was no mistaking the note of jealous interest in Wanda's voice. "How's that?"
"They've known her longer," Kitty said, feeling a little weird discussing Tabby's sex life with Wanda, a virtual stranger. "I just know about Lance and Pietro for sure."
Wanda was quiet for a moment. "If you tell anyone this, I swear to God that I will make you sorry you were ever born, Kitty Pryde."
"Uh..."
"Me and Tabby, we've got a thing starting up. I just wanted to know how much I'm going to have to convince her I'm not insane for liking her before she believes me."
"In that case," Kitty said, feeling a smile forming on her lips, "a lot. Tabby's not really high on self esteem."
Wanda snorted. "Don't think we're friends now just because we both hate Pietro and I told you about this..."
"No worries there," Kitty said to a dead line. _ In it's own strange way, that's kind of sweet. Like Bobby and St John without external genitalia._ She found herself dwelling on Wanda and Tabby and was a little surprised to see nearly an hour had passed while she tried to work out the mechanics of their relationship, existent or not. _I don't think I even want to try and figure out who'd be on top there... _ She was wide awake and a little ashamed of herself for being so perversely interested, noticing her pink face as she removed the vestiges of her make up and prepared for bed. _I think I actually need ice water...I'm not gay or even bi, but everything remotely sexual is doing that to me lately. Geez. I'm going to have to tell Kurt when he comes to, that is if he doesn't remember himself. And about Wanda and Tabby. That'll give him a thrill-his ex girlfriend is dating a woman. Wait...that might not be a good thing to tell him. Who knows what sort of mental image he'll get... _

Remy remained silent as a mouse as Kitty padded by him in the hall, a bottle of water, cold from the fridge, clutched in her hand. He spoke only when she reached the door to her room. "Up late, cherie?"
"Geezum crow, Remy!" Kitty gasped, clutching her heart. "Between you and Logan I'm going to die of a heart attack before I'm twenty!"
"Sorry, belle chere," he murmured,nterntered towards her, his intense gaze pinning herplacplace. "It ain't polite fo' Remy ta be scarin' a jolie femme, eh?"
"What's with all the cherries and belles, Remy?" she laughed nervously. "You feeling okay?"
"Never been better, p'tite..."
"Isn't Jubilee chere and petite and belle?" she asked, wanting to move but not quite able to do it. She found herself responding to Remy's nearness against her better judgment, a combination of her sexual frustration and his charm abilities making her unable to break his gaze.
"I love Jubilya kya know? Mais dere be somethin' I be needin' ta do 'fore I kin _love _ Jubilee again..." Remy stopped a foot from Kitty and frowned. "Dere me somethin' mebbe I should be tellin' you, too, eh? Don' be scared, Kitty. I'm not meanin' nothin' by dis 'side from wantin' to make tings be better fo' me an' ma femme."
Kitty closed her eyes tightly, _Don't look at him, don't find him attractive. Think of Kurt and his blue cuteness and how hot you think he is and how good he is to you and for you and in bed and...oh. Remy's awful close... _ She could smell his cologne and cigarette smoke, faintly underscored by the smell of cherry phosphate, of all things, Kitty realized faintly. _Remy drinks cherry pop. How funny...somehow, I never pictured him drinking soda... _
"Kitty, look at me," he said quietly.
"No," she said just as softly. "I'm wanting to do something right now that I shouldn't want to do and I will feel terrible if I do it and I think that you should turn around and let me go to my room. Tomorrow, we will be just friends and this never happened." Opening her eyes to find her gaze filled with Remy's intense visage, she said, "I love Kurt. There's no two ways about it and there is no way I'm going to jeopardize that."
"You ain't gonna...he don' have ta know." Remy sighed. "Dat's wrong...mes apologies. Kitty, Remy gonna tell ya somethin' dat ain't no one else ta know, bien?" _Aside _, he amended, _den Lance an' Toad... _
"Um..." Kitty was able to take a half-step back and held the water bottle in front of her like it was a cross and he were a vampire.
"Since I been seein' Evan kissin' Jubilation, I ain't able to...be wid her, ya know? An' it because I seein' her kiss some guy dat ain't me. I figger it square tings wid us if I kiss a gal an' you be my friend so..." he trailed off, almost apologetically.
"Wait a sec," she said a little breathlessly, mind whirling with all the secrets she was having to keep that night, "you can't...um...you know...because Evan kissed Jubilee?"
Remy actually blushed before Kitty's eyes and nodded. "It not a good month for the Cajun, eh?"
"I hear it happens to every guy at least once..."
"It ever happen ta Kurt?"
"Hell no!"
"I be getting' dat a lot..." he sighed. "I jus' be really needin' ta get through dis, ya know. An' dis be de only ting I can tink o' dat works..."
"You think kissing me will make things even or something?" Kitty shook her head. "Men!"
Remy quirked a brow. "Kurt's not gonna be kissin' ya any time soon so why not? It don' mean a ting wid us an' I not be wantin' ta sleep wid ya or nothin'..." He fixed Kitty with his most charming look. "Please?"
Kitty shook her head. "Remy, it's not right. I want to...I don't know why, but I want to...but it wouldn't be right..."
Remy decided it was now or never. He reached forward and sank his fingers into Kitty's hair, pulling her to him and sealing his mouth over hers, muffling her surprised cries as he darted his tongue out to taste her lips. Kitty felt her resolve weaken, Remy's expert touch drawing a kiss from her even though she was wracked with guilt, parting her lips with a slight sob as she felt her body respond. Remy made a low noise in his throat and drew away, brushing a kiss across her lips once more. "Not so bad, eh?"
"You fucking bitch!" Jubilee snarled from behind Remy. "I come out here to get a drink and you're making out with my boyfriend!"
"Jubilee! It not like dat!" Remy said, stepping in front of his girlfriend at the same time Kitty pressed against the wall. "I can 'splain!"
"You... you...man-whore!" Jubilee shouted. She flashed up a handful of sparkles and shoved them towards Remy, momentarily blinding him as she lunged at Kitty. Kitty did not phase fast enough, catching the flat of Jubilee's palm squarely on her nose as she fell through the wall and into her room.
"What the Hell was that racket?" Scott asked, storming from his room, hair messy and glasses hastily shoved on his face.
"That," Kitty said, sitting up slowly and speaking thickly, "was my nose breaking..."