Grey Frost

Grey Frost
Chapter 22: The Hardest Thing

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Emma woke up early next shortly after sunrise. Still exhausted after a night of sex the young blonde groaned as she looked over to the side of the bed. Scott and Jean were still fast asleep in each others’ arms. It wasn’t the most pleasant sight to wake up and see her boyfriend cuddling another woman, but after last night she starting to accept it.

Quietly and carefully, Emma slipped out of the bed and gathered some clothes. Once she was dressed in her underwear and one of Scott’s shirts, she prepared to slip out. But before she left she took one last look at Scott and Jean. As amazing as last night had been, it led her to a painful realization. Scott and Jena were in love. And that love was fully expressed not just physically, but on an emotional level as well.

After sensing it with her mind, Emma laid awake for over an hour. Sexual fatigue did little to lull her to sleep as she thought about how far she had come, what she had been through, and where she was going. Her relationship with Scott was a big part of it, but in the end there was no getting around the truth. Something had to be done. And with that in mind she made what she considered the most difficult decision she ever made.

“I’ll sure miss that feeling,” she said, looking at the content look on Jean’s face, “Enjoy it, Jean.”

She then slipped out of Scott’s room and returned to hers. Since it was early on a weekend nobody was up yet. It gave Emma a quiet moment to reflect as she showered, got dressed, and went about her normal morning duties. She kept having second thoughts. Was this decision right? Could she even go through with it?

Nothing was ever simple in Emma Frost’s life. So many of her choices came back to haunt her. It was only after joining the X-men that she started making the right ones. And she quickly learned that the right ones were often the hard ones.

Once dressed and ready, Emma made the long trek to Professor Xavier’s office. He was probably up by now, working on his research and preparing the day’s itinerary. Before entering, the former White Queen hesitated. This was it. Like so many times before, her life would never be the same once she made this choice.

“Professor?” she said as she entered anxiously.

“Emma?” said Xavier, looking up from his desk, “You’re up early. Is something wrong?”

Emma swallowed her nervousness as she closed the door and walked over to Xavier’s desk. The Professor quickly picked up on her state of mind. He hadn’t felt this much anxiety from her since she first arrived. Clearly, she had something serious to discuss.

“We need to talk about something important,” she said, “You see, I’ve been doing some thinking. This institute has given me something I never thought I could have. I had a place I belonged and a cause worth fighting for. And after you and the X-men saved me twice, I’ve come to believe in it.”

“But that’s not all, is there?” said Xavier astutely.

Emma sighed and took a deep breath. This was going to be even harder than she thought.

“Guess it’s useless hiding things from the world’s most powerful telepath,” she said, “And you’re right. That’s not all. As much as I enjoy being here, there’s still so much I have to atone for. And there are a few things here that…well, I can’t really get into because it’s too complicated.”

Xavier surmised it had to do with Scott. Her emotions were running high. Her heart was pounding. This was a very painful moment for her, but he didn’t stop her from doing what she thought was right.

“You’ve already done so much for me, Professor. Now it’s time I do some things for myself. And I…I’ve made a decision.”

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A few hours later, Scott began to stir from his deep slumber. After last night he was reeling, but in a good way. He still couldn’t believe it. He had a three way with Emma Frost and Jean Grey. Both were girls he felt strongly for and both were girls who looked very good in lingerie.

The whole experience was a daze to him, but he remembered enough to know it was amazing. The pleasure, the passion, and the emotion had been intense. He got into it as much as the girls and at Emma’s request, let his passions run wild. It led him to do things he never thought he could do otherwise. It was intense and liberating. He would have to thank Emma for putting him up to it.

Smiling to himself, he hugged the naked figure in his bed. Still half-asleep, he started kissing down her neck and feeling along her womanly curves. It caused her to stir and let out a content moan. But when Scott heard who it was, he snapped out of his daze.

“Huh? Jean?”

“Hmm…Scott?”

Stirring from her sleep, Jean opened her eyes to see a fully naked Scott Summers next to her. Memories of last night came rushing back to her and she blushed. But at the same time she couldn’t help but smile. Awkward it might be, it was a pretty nice feeling waking up in Scott’s arms.

“Uh…where’s Emma?” asked Scott nervously.

“I don’t know?” said Jean with a yawn, “I guess she’s already up.”

Watching Jean stretch her limbs caused the sheets to fall back and reveal Jean’s naked body. Even though he saw it in great detail last night, Scott couldn’t help but stare. She looked very nice in the morning sun. Her skin radiated with wondrous brilliance even through his ruby quartz shades.

But he quickly shook his head clean of such images. As wonderful as last night had been, Jean wasn’t his girlfriend. The three-way was over. He couldn’t keep looking at Jean like this. He was with Emma.

“Is something wrong?” asked Jean, scooting over towards him.

“No…nothing’s wrong,” he said, turning away and slipping out of bed, “I just…”

“You thought I was Emma, didn’t you?” she said with a bemused glare.

“What? No!” he said quickly, “Okay, maybe to some extent. Usually that’s who I wake up to after sex. That doesn’t mean I…”

“Relax Scott,” laughed Jean, “I understand. Emma’s your girlfriend. I haven’t forgotten.”

“Yeah…thanks.”

Scott smiled, causing Jean to blush this time. It sure was awkward. After their conversation last night, she didn’t expect Emma to just up and leave her boyfriend with a naked woman in his bed. But then again she didn’t know how three-ways worked.

The next few moments were awkward as Scott and Jean got dressed. While the passion of last night had subsided, they couldn’t help but steal a few glances of each others’ bodies. Last night had been amazing for the both of them. Jean had no idea sex could be so passionate, especially after the emotionless fucking she had with Duncan and the Hellfire guards. And Scott wasn’t sure, but he may have let out more than just lust last night when he had sex with Jean.

“So are we going to be awkward around each other for the rest of the week?” asked Jean, now back in her lingerie.

“Jean, we had sex last night,” said Scott as he tossed her his robe, “It’ll be awkward whether we like it or not.”

“Point taken,” she muttered, “But then again it was Emma’s idea.”

“Yeah, I still can’t believe she put us up to it,” laughed Scott, “I swear that woman finds new ways to surprise me every day.”

“Well she’s a complex person,” mused Jean, “Sometimes people are capable of things you’d never expect.”

“You mean like you were last night?” joked Scott.

“I won’t argue that,” she said with a playful smile, “But to be fair, it wasn’t all me. You played an important role as well. And I can’t thank you enough for it.”

Scott blushed again. At this rate he and Jean wouldn’t be able to look at each other without blushing. Last night brought out some unexpected feelings. Now that he looked back on it, he felt as though he gave Jean more attention than he gave Emma. When he let it out, his passions drew him to her more than his girlfriend. That was a strange feeling and one he was going to have to work out with Emma.

“I should probably thank Emma too,” said Jean, “She was right. Real sex can never take the place of solo.”

“I don’t doubt that,” said Scott, “So…last night was just to get it out of your system? You know, because of the drug?”

“Yeah, I guess. But…”

Jean’s words then trailed off. While last night brought her much needed sexual relief, it brought so many other feelings she didn’t expect.

“But what?” asked Scott curiously.

“Uh nothing,” said Jean, shaking her head clear of such thoughts, “Let’s go get some breakfast.”

Sighing to himself, Scott followed Jean out into the hall. She knew she hadn’t been completely forward with Scott. Last night wasn’t just meaningless sex to her. It was a travesty against passion to put it in the same category as Duncan or the Hellfire guards. Having sex with Scott last night brought out more than just her libido. It showed just how strong her feelings for him had become. She may not have been able to express them verbally, but everything came out on a very physical level.

But as nice as last night had been for both of them, it was time to return to the real world. Scott had to sit down and talk to Emma and so did Jean. After last night they had to work a few things out. But strangely, she wasn’t at breakfast and neither was the Professor.

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As the day went by, Emma was nowhere to be seen and Scott was starting to worry. He couldn’t help but feel that Emma was avoiding him. Being psychic, it wouldn’t be too hard for her. She just had to sense when he was near and slip away.

But Emma wouldn’t do that. He was her boyfriend. Even though things had been a little tense between them since they got back, they were still together. When something was up Emma wasn’t one to keep it to herself. She yelled it out and made a big deal about it. It was one of her defining personality traits. But if she wasn’t acting like her usual self, that made him worry even more.

Was she worried about the three-way? It was possible, but then again it was her idea in the first place. It wasn’t like they had time to debate it. She just threw it on him. At the time he didn’t think too much of it. What guy could in that situation? But he was beginning to think that maybe there was something else to this issue.

Late in the afternoon, Scott finished an afternoon workout and went to the kitchen for a snack. There he found Kitty and Jubilee there eating sandwiches and chips at the table.

“Ladies,” he greeted, “Have you seen Emma around?”

“Emma? Nope, not today,” said Jubilee, “Why? You two have a fight or something?”

“What? No!” said Scott, rolling his eyes, “I just need to talk to her and I can’t find her.”

“You sure?” teased Jubilee, “Isn’t it usually a sign when a guy can’t even find his girlfriend?”

“Jubilee…” said Scott in annoyance.

“Ease up, Jubes!” exclaimed Kitty, “And yes, I did see Emma earlier. She’s been in and out of the Professor’s office all day.”

Scott let out a sigh of relief. Finally, he was on to something.

“Thanks Kitty,” he said, “I’ll go see if she’s still there.”

But before he could leave, Kitty got up and stopped him

“Wait!” she said, “There’s something else.”

“What is it?” asked Scott.

Kitty’s expression shifted. Her instinct told her not to get too involved with other peoples’ relationships. She had enough problems with people pestering her about Lance. But this was one instance where her concern got the better of her.

“I don’t mean to sound as rude as some people tend to be,” she said, earning her a scold from Jubilee, “But Emma seemed a little off when I saw her. I’m no psychic, but she looked, like, totally out of it.”

“How so? Did she look angry or upset?” asked Scott with greater intrigue.

“I don’t know,” shrugged Kitty, “If anything, she looked sad.”

Now Scott was really worried. Kitty wasn’t the kind to joke about these sorts of thing. He wouldn’t have been too shocked if he found out Emma was angry or upset. But sad was different. Emma didn’t get sad. She always resisted emotions that made her weak. If she really was sad it had to be serious.

“I’ll talk to her,” said Scott strongly.

“Anything we can help you with?” offered Kitty.

“No, this is something I have to handle on my own. Thanks Kitty.”

Scott left the two girls to ponder. Jubilee was a bit surprised that her offhand comment actually had some truth to it and Kitty was more concerned than anything else. While Scott and Emma’s relationship was hot gossip, it wasn’t lost on them how much it affected their lives. Scott and Emma were their friends and when something was amiss it caught their attention.

“What do you think is up with them?” asked Jubilee.

“I don’t know,” sighed Kitty, “Those two have always had a weird relationship.”

“Yeah, you never know with those two.”

“Like totally,” said Kitty, “And whatever’s going on I hope it’s not too serious. After what they’ve been through, they deserve stability.”

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Scott couldn’t get upstairs fast enough in his search for Emma. Along the way he nearly knocked over a table. He was in that big a hurry to catch up with his girlfriend. If Kitty was right then it was his duty to at least try and find out more.

He was close to the Professor’s office. He was just about to turn the final corner when suddenly Emma came out and bumped right into him. It caught Scott so off guard he nearly fell flat on the floor. But once he saw Emma he didn’t care about clumsiness.

“Emma!” he exclaimed “Where have you been all day? I’ve been looking all over for you.”

“Oh…Scott,” she said distantly, “Sorry, I’ve been busy.”

“Busy with what?” he asked, “What’s going on? Is everything okay?”

Emma turned away. She was hoping he wouldn’t find her while she got things squared away with the Professor. But given Scott’s dedication, she knew it was a long shot at best. That didn’t make seeing him any less painful.

“Something’s come up,” she told him, “And I…I can’t talk about it just yet.”

“Why? Does it have anything to do with last night?” he pushed

“No…not entirely,” she said, still looking away.

“Then what is it?” said Scott, cupping her chin and turning her gaze towards him, “Come on, Emma. Talk to me. I’m here for you. You know that, right?”

Her heart leapt up into her throat. Feeling his touch and looking into those shrouded eyes of his sent her to the verge of tears. She couldn’t believe that she of all people was getting choked up about a man. But this wasn’t just any man. Scott Summers was very important to her. That was why she had to do this no matter how much it hurt.

“I know, darling,” she said softly, “But I need to work a few things out before we talk. Meet me in my room tonight?”

“Tonight? Sure,” said Scott in relief, “Is there anything I can help you with?”

“No, this is something I have to do on my own. I’ll tell you everything when the time’s right. I promise.”

To seal the deal, she planted a kiss on his lips. It was more than just a simple promissory kiss. It was deep and passionate, but at the same time it was solemn. Looking at her distraught expression, Scott was tempted to press her more. But he trusted she would keep her word.

“Okay,” he said with a smile, “I’ll see you then.”

“Yeah…see you.”

Scott embraced Emma one last time before he left her to her business. Emma found herself hanging on an extra moment. As he walked away she watched distantly until he disappeared down the hall. Once he was gone she let out a hard sob and wiped the tears from her eyes.

Emma was never one to get this emotional, but Scott brought out so many deep feelings in her. Before him, emotion was weakness and feelings were strictly superficial. Then he saved her life and they came together. Memories of all the good times they had together from their first date to the first time they made love came rushing back. Complications aside, every last one of them was worth treasuring. And she would never forget them.

But their lives had taken different turns. Things change and so do feelings. She had come to accept that. Now it was just a matter of letting Scott know. And if that last kiss was any indication, it was going to be very hard.

“Goodbye Scott,” she whispered under her breath, “Thanks for everything.”

When she turned back towards Xavier’s office, she did so with a heavy heart. She opened the doors to see the professor waiting with Logan and Ororo by his side. They all looked down and she didn’t blame them. Like her, they had come to enjoy her presence at the institute as well. It was too bad it had to turn out like this.

“Are you ready, Emma?” asked Xavier.

“I’m ready,” she said, holding back another sob.

“Are you sure about this?” asked Ororo with her usual concern, “This is a pretty big move on your part.”

“I’m sure,” she said strongly, “Let’s get this over with. I have one last thing I need to do.”

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Later that evening, Scott rushed upstairs to Emma’s room so they could talk. At her request, he gave her the space she needed so she could work out whatever she had to work out with the Professor. All the while he did whatever he could to keep himself distracted, running his own Danger Room session and catching up on his homework. However, it didn’t stop him from worrying.

As he neared her room, he had this feeling in the pit of his stomach that something wasn’t right. Ever since Emma got back from the Hellfire Club things had been strained between them. Hopefully, this was his chance to work things out. He owed it to her for everything they had been through together.

Scott took a deep breath before knocking on her door. He had a feeling this was going to be a difficult conversation. He was about to knock when Jean came up from behind him.

“Scott?” she said, “Did Emma ask you to meet with her too?”

“Huh? Well…yeah,” said Scott, “I guess you caught up with her too.”

“No, she came to me,” said Jean, “She said she wanted to talk about something. She looked…”

“Sad?” finished Scott, “Yeah, I thought so too.”

Now they were both curious. Scott had been hoping to have a nice serious moment with his girlfriend and Jean had been hoping to have a meaningful discussion about everything that had been going on lately. Something was off here.

“Why would she put both of us up to it?” wondered Jean.

“I don’t know. Let’s ask her.”

Scott knocked on the door intently. He had a lot of questions and a sad girlfriend to ask. He had to talk to her. He couldn’t take her being like this.

“Emma? Emma, we’re here. Come on, open up.”

He kept knocking, but got no answer. Getting nervous, he looked back at Jean.

“Is she in there?” he asked her.

“I don’t know,” doing a quick telepathic scan, “Open the door.”

Taking a deep breath, Scott opened the door and stepped inside. When he and Jean entered they were met with an unexpected and disheartening sight. Emma’s room was completely empty. She had left without saying a word.

For a moment, Scott and Jean stood in shock. It was so sudden. Why would Emma just pick up and leave? At first Scott didn’t believe it. He looked around the room, searching for her stuff. But she took everything. Her wardrobe, accessories, and paperwork was all gone. Immediately, his heart leapt up into his throat.

“She…she left,” he said distantly.

“Scott, look at this!” said Jean.

Turning towards Jean, he saw that she was holding a lone white envelope that she had found on Emma’s desk. On the front it said ‘Scott’ in bold letters. And judging from the handwriting, it was clearly Emma’s.

“What is this?” he said distantly as he took the letter, “What’s going on?”

“Open it and let’s find out,” said Jean intently.

Scott tore open the envelope and took out a handwritten letter. His heart was racing and his hands trembled as he read over the words. Jean stood close to him and read with him. Together, they learned what Emma had done and why.

Dear Scott,

By the time you read this letter I’ll have packed up my stuff and left the institute. Don’t run to the Professor, he already knows. Don’t yell at the others. I didn’t tell them either. This is my decision and this letter is my message to you. Just know that every word that follows comes straight from my heart. And I tell you in this way because it would just be too painful any other way.

This past week I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. I’ve thought about my life, our relationship, and the future. Together, we’ve shared some great times. We had fun going out on dates, holding each other, and making love. I know we didn’t have the most stable of relationships, but that didn’t mean our love was any less special.

But then something happened at the Hellfire Club. When Jean and I combined our powers to reach out for help, she connected with you and I saw just how close you two were. It wasn’t close as in best friends close. It was close as in true love close. I know you two promised me you wouldn’t let your bond affect our relationship, but I realized that it’s not possible.

And since Jean’s probably reading this with you, I’ll come out and say it. You two love each other. You’ve always loved each other. You love each other in a way you can’t love me. I see that now. I’ve accepted it. And I know no matter how much I love you, I’ll never have the kind of bond that you two share. That’s why I think it would be for the best that we ended our relationship.

I’m sorry, Scott. But it just can’t work this way. I can’t tell you how much it hurts. That’s part of why I’ve decided to leave the institute. You and the X-men have shown me a world of new possibilities. You taught me there is good in the world that’s worth fighting for and I’m going to keep fighting for the dream, but on my own terms.

You didn’t just save my life, you saved my soul, Scott Summers. And I’ll always love you for it. Go to Jean and tell her you love her. Treasure what you two have each and every day. Tell Jean to take good care of you. And if she ever needs any advice, she knows who to call. Regardless of our differences, she’s still a friend. And tell her she’s the best friend a girl like me could ask for.

I’ll miss everybody at the institute, but I’ll miss you two the most. Never forget what we learned together while we loved. So for now, this is goodbye. I promise we’ll see each other again, but for now we need to find our own paths. I’m still looking for mine, but I think you have yours right there with you. And it’s time you embrace it.

Be happy, be safe, and be kind. Never forget how much you mean to me. I’ll always love you and I’ll always treasure our time together. Goodbye.

Love Always,
Emma Frost

A small tear stain covered the final words. Emma had been crying as she finished this final note to the man who saved her in so many ways. And when he read her words, he started feeling tears of his own.

Setting the letter aside, Scott and Jean stood together in a daze. Scott’s heart was reeling. Jean was at a total loss. Together, they sat on the bed. They exchanged glances, their eyes full of sorrow. Emma was gone now. She left them, but at least she said goodbye. Not only that, she revealed to them that which they could not reveal to each other. And without a word, they came together in and embrace and hugged.

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Up next: Scott and Jean finally have their moment and Emma begins her new life.