Tempest in a Teapot

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> Tempest in a Teapot Chapter Two
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> Disclaimers Apply
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> A/N Goddess Foxfeather, Queen of Mad Plotbunnies, BUSIEST WOMAN ALIVE ™, Prophetic Muse, Hamster Witch and Uberbeta… poor mug. *sniffle* InterNutter, TC, Maxwell Pink, Dracena and Greywolf are loverly and wondermous for archiving/hosting. J ProPhile: Still surviving? Morgan: *pokes with pokey stick * Readers/Reviewers: J Thanks!
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> “What the Hell…”
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> “He’s a crane,” Jubilee sighed, tossing a sardine in Kurt’s general direction. “Again.”
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> “What was he earlier?” Scott stared openly at Kurt, perched as the blue mutant was on the edge of the kitchen table, hands tucked under his armpits like wings.
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> “I’m not sure but I think it was some sort of amphibian,” Jean sighed, looking haggard and more than a little damp. “Or a seal.”
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> Jubilee snorted indelicately. “I think he was a fish. He kept flopping in the tub…” She tossed the last sardine from the can she had procured from somewhere in the back of the pantry and held it up for Kurt to see. “All gone, dude.”
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> Kurt made another whooping noise and proceeded to preen his arms. Scott sighed and covered his eyes. “Has anyone called Kitty yet?”
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> Jubilee shook her head. “She just got settled in at school… If this doesn’t clear up by tonight, though, the Professor thinks we should. And Astrid, too.” Jubilee paused. “Erk. Can you imagine the Maternal Rage at this?”
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> Storm chose that moment to make her presence known. “I don’t think it’s a good idea,” she announced from under the table. “Astrid is scary.”
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> “Yes,” Scott sighed, “Astrid can be scary…” He leaned closer to Jean and whispered, “Has Beast made any headway on the analysis?”
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> “So far,” the redhead replied in hushed tones, “the blood work is coming up normal, as are the urine tests, the saliva swabs and the swabs of the inside of the teapot. The only thing he can think of is that it’s some sort of telepathic attack.”
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> “If it is, why these two?” Scott asked, leading Jean towards the rec room by virtue of his grasp on her elbow. “I mean, there’s more likely targets for a telepathic attack.”
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> Jean rubbed her temple distractedly, a frown marring her features. “I know,” she replied, a hint of irritation in her voice. “But the whole thing boils down to no physical evidence of a virus, bacterial involvement or even xenotoxicity.”
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> “Jean, I love you but please use tiny words today.”
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> “Poisoning from outside the body,” she rephrased her previous statement, glancing past Scott into the kitchen where Kurt was waddling, bent-kneed, along the table, following Jubilee as she rummaged in the pantry for crackers. “Beast had a Hell of a time getting the teapot away from Storm. She acted like he was stealing her baby when he took it!”
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> “Maybe it’s something they ate,” Scott suggested, wincing as Storm let out a long, high pitched ululation and leapt onto the table beside Kurt. “Or not.”
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> Jean sighed anew and shook her head. “All I know is that medical science is baffled.”
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> Storm crept along the edge of the shadows carefully. If they see her, she thought, they’d make her wear the itchy thing again and she didn’t like the itchy thing. People had been acting strange for a long time, she added mentally. Maybe they were all sick! She could hear the sounds of people eating: plates and silverware clinking together, ice hitting the side of a glass, lowered voices and someone talking about the spinach being a bit sandy. Good, she smiled to herself. They can’t see me if they’re eating!
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> “I’m going to have to run another analysis on the tea itself,” Beast murmured to the Professor, trying to keep his voice down to avoid making the topic any more public than it had to be. “I’d like to send a sample to the university to run through their GC/MS[1]. And the teapot as well, once I’ve exhausted all possible tests here.” He paused to take a sip of his ice water. “I must admit that I am thoroughly baffled by this turn of events. Rather than the effects of a possible poisoning or drugging wearing off with time, they’re maintaining at a steady rate. It’s been approximately ten hours since they were found and they have not improved.”
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> “At least,” Professor Xavier sighed, “they haven’t worsened. I can’t get inside their heads… It’s chaos, a mass of disjointed images and thoughts that would take me hours to sort out.”
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> “OH MY GOD!”
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> Beast and Professor Xavier looked up sharply at Rogue’s outburst. Standing in the doorway to the dining hall, smiling as if nothing were amiss, Storm stood, hands on her hips, naked as the day she was born. Logan, making choking, wheezing noises while turning a distinctly purple shade, shoved himself away from the table, oversetting his chair before he managed to clear his throat, sprinting around the table to fling himself between Storm’s nudity and the stunned eyes of the rest of the Institute residents. “For fuck’s sake, someone get her a robe!”
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> “Silly man,” Storm trilled, her voice silvery and sing-song. “Why are you so embarrassed by my form? I’m beautiful!”
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> “That,” Logan growled, “is a bit of the problem! HEY! Eyes on your plate, Madrox!”
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> Beast swallowed his mouthful of water and pushed away from the table. “ I think I’d better get those samples together now…”
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> “Yes, I think you better had,” Professor Xavier replied, his eyebrows somewhere in the middle of his scalp. “Logan, take her back to the medical lab and make sure the door is guarded at all times. And check on Kurt!”
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> Storm sighed theatrically. “Silly humans! Why are you so afraid of nudity?” She spread her arms and took a prancing leap past Logan and into the dining room. “We faeries have no such fear!”
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> “Oh, lord,” Rogue’s voice broke the thick, stunned silence. “This is so going in the Christmas newsletter.”
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> [1] http://www.answers.com/topic/gas-chromatography-mass-spectrometry