Hiding

It’s the groovy disclaimer line. I own nothing that you’ve heard of before although royalties would be nice. before + these exciting factoids:
again, if my foreign language usage makes you shriek in disbelief, blame babel fish, not me. I took Spanish for 6 years and can barely carry on a conversation with a severely learning disabled 2 yold.old. The only thing I know how to say in German is “I have a gummy bear in my nose” and “I have leather panties” Also- I realized that in most Nightcrawler fics, people tend to write things like “ja” and stuff like that. While I have chucked in a few German phrases, there is no way I can write phonetically. Did you read trainspotting? Did you have any clue what the fuck what was being said for most of it? The dialogue, not the plot. I didn’t think so. So, just pretend he always had the damned accent, OK? I do acknowledge Roisin’s apparent lobotomy in this regard here, but you’re all smarter than an imaginary character, aren’t you??

Big thanks to Aughra, my ‘creepy internet friend’ for still loving me after reading this and as always, to my super beta Magnus-

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Inside the car, Roisin and Kurt finished their dinners without speaking. Roisin, aware of her earlier vow not to read Kurt without asking, was finding it difficult to ignore the feelings that poured off of him like that one Italian guy she’d dated’s cologne. Anger, frustration, jealousy- they radiated off of him and made her stomach cold. She wrapped up the remainder of her food and turned to Kurt, suddenly realizing that his image inducer made him a dead ringer for Vincent Cassel in The Crimson Rivers and how that was sort of disturbingly attractive. Stupid French movie star. Stupid Kurt for looking like him now and still be mad at her. Stupid her for being such an imbecile and letting her control freakness take charge just so she could torture Logan for a useless two minutes, like that was going to change what had happened between them. She wanted to scream, mostly because she knew the situation she found herself in- the Kurt not speaking to her one, not the religious freaks wanting to get her one- was totally her own fault. That always made it worse. It was easier when she could blame someone else.

“Are you done? I’m gonna go throw this out…I can take yours too.” She offered, in her best attempt at a normal tone. Kurt looked over at her, his eyes still dark, the hurt in them still visible to her. She tried smile a little, hoping this would somehow lighten the mood in the car which seemed to still be ‘mourning lite’ with a touch of pandemic plague thrown in.

“Yeah. Thanks.” He handed her the papers and napkins left over from his food and she took them, got out of the car and walked over to the garbage can about fifteen feet away and threw the refuse out. Sighing, she returned to the car, knowing she had to face the music and own up to her incredibly immature and selfish behavior. She also knew enough about Kurt to know he wasn’t going to let her off the hook that easily, and the part of her that she’d always thought she’d pretty well squashed was hoping he would make it hard, and that she’d have to beg him. She wished there was a way to glare at herself.

“Kurt- I really want to apologize…please, just let me finish-“she said, seeing his mouth open as he got ready to protest. His gaze met hers now and it was very, very cold.

“I need to apologize. It was awful for me to do that- what you saw back there…I-I have no real excuse other than I was reading Logan and I could feel his attraction to me and it made me angry that after he just took off and left me like that he would have the nerve to be angry and jealous of you and me. I wanted to make him suffer, just atle tle bit, for what he did to me. I was so caught up in that, I didn’t think about how you’d feel. Not that I even know you feel or can really expect you to feel anything- after all, we’ve only known each other for a few days and though you’re unlike any man I’ve ever known- “ she saw his face darken again. “No Kurt, I mean that in a good way! I’ve never met anyone as kind and thoughtful and cderaderate and..” she trailed off, silenced by his look of clear loathing. Ok. That didn’t go so well. Instinctively, she backed up towards the door, crushing her tail against it in her attempt to get away.

Kurt didn’t speak for a minute. He glanced around the parking lot, and seeing that their spot was pretty well set off from all the other cars, he reached down and switched off the image inducer, going from Cassellike back to fuzzy blue. Despite herself, she felt herself soften at the sight of the real Kurt.

He leaned in towards her, using one three fingered hand to prop himself against the back window and the other to hang on the headrest of the passenger seat, perching like a gargoyle on the seat His pointed tail whipped back and forth, making little ‘thwap’ sounds when it hit the upholstery. He tilted his head somewhat to the side and sneered at her. She felt her breath catch- angry Kurt was decidedly less cuddly. She was almost dizzy from the pressure of all the unexpressed emotions bursting out of him in a violent eruption.*

“So that’s me? Kind? Thoughtful? Considerate?” he hissed at her, his face now only inches from hers. She realized suddenly that she hadn’t even noticed his accent until right now. Perhaps when he was angry it was stronger. The words came out quicker, harsher almost. “Wow, you must have a hard time keeping your pants on around me, right? There’s nothing sexier than a failed priest, one that looks like the devil but acts like he’s part of the Papal special army? Maybe one with a whole host of esteem and identity issues? I mean, how could you possibly resist that, especially when your former submissive is sniffing around trying to get another shot at you.” Roisin was shaking her head, wanting desperately to explain herself, to tell him that it wasn’t really like that, but Kurt cut her off again, shifting position again and grabbing her jaw with his hand, holding her in place so she had no choice but to look at him. The aforementioned supposed to be squashed down part of her- the switch who loved being made to submit just as much if not more than she loved to dominate- perked up at this, and unconsciously she felt herself start to flush. Kurt was too caught up in haranguing her to notice, however. His eyes narrowed, and Roisin wondered how anyone had ever missed seeing what was behind them.

“If you think he was ever submissive to you you’re deluding yourself. Women are possessions to him, toys to play with and throw away. Maybe with you the rules meant he had to let you boss him around, but you know what? You were still just a toy he threw away, no matter what else you thought you were to him.” She didn’t say anything, she just tried to hold Kurt’s gaze, which now felt as though he were looking through her. She knew this was healthy for him, he had to get these things out. How long had it been since he’d actually gotten angry with someone, or said what he was really thinking without taking anyone else’s feelings into consideratio
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He seemed to sense her softening and he tightened his grip on her jaw with the one hand, the preternaturally long and thick fingers pressing into her flesh so that she thought she might just end up with bruises there. For a quick second she wondered what was taking Logan so long and she glanced out of the car towards where the food court was, seeing no one coming their way, and definitely no one who looked like Logan. What if Kurt really had freaked out, just lost it? Well if that happened, she realized, she properly fucked. His eyes caught the movement of hers towards the food court. He laughed uproariously at this, leaning back and collapsing against the far door, and she relaxed for a moment. He’s just fucking with me on purpose… he's just playing around..she thought, sighing with relief. There was nothing to be worried about. In fact, maybe she could get him to do this later, in bed… His laughing stopped suddenly and he leaned back in towards her, putting both of his hands on her shoulders and holding her so that his mouth was at her ear. He drew one leg up between hers, pushing her thighs apart with his knee. She felt herself tense up again.

“Logan’s not coming yet. Actually, he probably has at least once, you’ve seen him in rest stops before haven’t you? He picks up girls ancks cks them, like he used to do you.” Roisin was no longer sure what exactly was going on. She was too frazzled to read him now even if he’d asked her nicely to. The tone he was using right now was alarming as was the sudden ability to swear every other word. She was pretty sure that until now if he had muttered something uncouth it had been in German. This was unsettling her more than she wanted and she tried to push him away. Sub or not, this was getting a little scary. Kurt was getting scary. And she absolutely, positively, was not remotely turned on. No. Not even a little bit. Hmph.

“Kurt, get off! Stop it, this, this isn’t you! You’re doing this on purpose, to get back at me! You’re trying to scare me off, or just …” she stopped, not knowing what else to say. She was beyond confused now. She was aware of cold sweat trailing down her back along the line of fur, and the way gooseflesh had sprouted up and down her arms. He was very close to her now, and her heart pounded in her chest, and she was sure he could feel what this was doing to her- arousing and confusing as it was, there was no way he could miss the changes in her body- his knee was right up against her stockings, for christ’s sake, and there was no way he couldn’t have noticed how they were starting to dampen just a little bit through her panties.


“You know what, Roisin? I’m sick of being the good guy. Dependable? Fuck it. I’m sick of it and I’m done. I did that for years and years and what did it ever get me? Es veranließ mich, alle zu bumsen! From now on, I’m going to do what I want to do, take what I want to take, and the hell with anyone who thinks otherwise…Maybe this is me, maybe it has been all along and I’ve just been lying to everyone. Is that what you wanted to hear?” he snarled at her, his eyes and fangs bright in the awful yellow light of the parking lot.

“No. Kurt…I just want you to be you. If you don’t want to be dependable then don’t be. If you want to take what you want, then just take it- I’m not stopping you.” She said quietly, that submissive part of her having efficiently kicked Roisin the Dom the hell out, and settled in nicely. She looked up at him in what she hoped was a pleading way.

“Take what I want? You know, I think maybe I’ll do just that.” He said breathily, leaning in towards her. She panicked for a moment, not that it did any good. In a moment he’d flipped her onto her back and was lying on top of her, his weight holding her in place. She looked up at him, and still seeing the fuzzy blue Kurt she’d grown so fond of was strange,because he seemed almost to be in fact another person. Who, she had to admit, was just as arousing as the other Kurt. He crushed her mouth with his own, enveloping her in a kiss that rivaled Logan’s of old for sheer hunger and lust. His hands were up under her skirt in a matter of seconds, ahe hhe heard the sound of her stockings being ripped at the crotch at the same time she felt the rush of cold air. In a moment his long, thick fingers were buried inside of her, with no warning, no teasing. Just his fingers up to the palm of his hand thrusting into her as he kissed her relentlessly. She could feel his erection against her thigh and as much as she was freaked out by the sudden change in him, she couldn’t deny that she’d been wanting nothing more than to be ravaged by him for days now. Thought she’d been only a little bit wet when he’d thrust his fingers into her- the burning she felt would attest to that, she now felt herself growing sopping wet. The fact that it was happening in the back seat of a car- a favorite of hers- was just a bonus. His tongue lapped at her ear and he whispered evilly into it, punctuating his words with thrusts of those amazing fingers, while his equally unusual thumb had begun to play around with her clitoris. Roisin could barely concentrate on his words, the arousal she felt was so all encompassing. She’d told Kurt about her switch identity, and how outside of work she preferred to be dominated, but never imagined he’d take it to such lengths.

“I want you to listen to me, Roisin. I’m not some toy for you to play with- you or Logan. You can think whatever you want, that I’m weak or damaged from whatever happened, but that’s not true. I can be as much of an animal as him, as much of an animal as you. I’ll not be begging you for anything, Roisin, damn your domination tendencies. From now on, things will be different. You’re going to listen to me. You’re going to obey me. “

He dragged his words out, stabbing into her with his fingers before dropping his head down to her waist, ripping her skirt up the sides and throwing it to either side of her waist. Seconds later all thought left her as she felt his tongue on her- lapping at her opening, teasing her lips apart and nibbling on her clit. She felt his fangs sneak down and bite down hard on her thigh, and she had to bite her hand to keep from screaming in ecstasy. Kurt’s fingers continued their assault on her as he lapped at her as calmly as a kitten and then biting lightly on her clit.

“Look at you, writhing around like that, like a cat in heat. This is what you’ve wanted all along, isn’t it? This is why you’ve been pushing me! You and Logan both, you wanted this to happen…Logan thinking he needed to get his old friend laid, you just wanting to lay on your back with your legs spread and get the fuck you think you deserve, Sie kleine Dirne, habe ich? Recht? he hissed at her, his eyes flashing. Roisin’s nose was numb and she could barely form words, so close was she to climax. How could he possibly know that being humiliated like this, insulted like this, would turn her on so much? She hadn’t even known until she’d heard him practically spit what, though she spoke no German, undoubtedly meant ‘whore’ at her.

“You are a little slut, aren’t you…look how you’re squirming about, thrusting your hips up at me, trying to get my tongue and my fingers deeper in you... You want me to fuck you, don’t you? “ he panted at her as she moaned deep in her throat and tried to pull him closer, trying to blink out the brightness of the overhead lights in the parking lot designed to prevent, most likely, this exact thing. She felt him lean back, opening his pants and rubbing his cock up against her, the wetness of him only addio tho the drenching of her car upholstery which she was now fairly certain smelled like a Mexican whorehouse.

“You want this, don’t you? Of course you do…You want me to fuck you… Tell me you want it, Roisin, tell me you need me to fuck you.” He gasped, obviously unaware of the way speaking to her and ordering her around like this would turn him on and completely oblivious to the way it was making her almost blind with need.

“Yes…God, Kurt, yes, please, please”she pleaded, trying to pull him towards her, wincing when he pulled away and sat up, buttoning his pants. She gasped with disappointment, and was utterly shocked when he reached his hand out and smothered her mouth with his hand. Any other time in her life that action would have been rewarded with her nails digging into the tender flesh on the face, her fangs bared, and blood spurting about as she defended herself. No one had ever gagged her like that. Even when she'd bottomed for other Dom's, no one had ever done that. Instead she simply felt herself contract around nothing, her muscles reaching for the fingers that were no longer there and her breath coming in ragged uneven hitches.

“Fix yourself, you little whore, Logan’s coming back.” Though Roisin had always bridled at the term slut or whore before, something about Kurt saying it to her made it all right. In fact, coming from his lips she could imagine almost no sweeter sound. She caught his eye, and saw that he was smiling at her, in what she was certain was a genuine way. She sat up, trying to fix her skirt before looking down and seeing that Kurt had fucked it up properly and there was no way she’d be able to repair it before Logan, maybe five feet from the car, arrived. Instead she pulled the blanket over her and reached for a cigarette, lighting it shakily as Logan opened the driver’s door and climbed in, glancing back at the two of them.

I swear to God, if he makes that fucking sniffing motion again I’m going to rip his testicles off and stuff them down his fucking throat…
Roisin thought to herself. Logan’s eyes caught hers and he seemed to know what she was thinking.

“Where have you been all this time, Logan? “ Kurt asked in his normal voice, sounding nothing he had a few moments ago as he’d verbally humiliated Roisin, driving his fingers and tongue into her. He absentmindedly reached one of his arms out and put it around her shoulder, squeezing gently. Logan started the car up and Kurt leaned over and kissed Roisin quickly on the cheek.

“I didn’t hurt you, did I? You’re all right? That was ok?” he said quietly, hoping Logan didn’t hear him. He and Logan had been friends for ages but he knew that if Logan thought Kurt had intentionally tried to hurt Roishe’dhe’d be breathing with very ventilated lungs. Roisin noticed that the German accent was still there, but she was right in that it was much more pronounced when he’d been angry. She nodded and smiled at him, tears threatening to spill out from her eyes, which he noticed, had hugely dilated pupils now. He nodded back, and took her hand in his, stroking her palm with his fingers.

Roisin wanted to weep with the feeling of it. He didn’t hate her. She hadn’t totally destroyed everything. In fact, pissing him off was probably the smartest thing she’d done today, she thought to herself, replaying the way his tongue had felt on her and how close she'd come to finally getting him to fuck her. She'd have to get him to promise that he'd take her in the car at least once, she thought to herself, feeling more and more like her old self again. She thought quickly of her friends in Cape Cod, and hoped they hadn't suffered. She knew that they would be happy for her, happy that she'd found someone and she tried to push the images of their smiling faces away. Not now, she couldn't deal with it right now. She remembered what had always cheered her up and immediately tried it.

“Yeah Logan, what took you so long? Get your dick stuck in someone?” she asked, in what she hoped was a somewhat annoying tone. He was still fun to fuck with, after all. Kurt chuckled under his breath. Logan’s eyes met hers in the rearview mirror and he couldn’t help but smile at the feigned innocence he saw there.

“Yeah. Somethin’ like that. You mind if I open the windows a bit? Smells like a whorehouse in here.” He teased back.

“Nah, go ahead. Probably just smelling yourself after banging that girl- it was a girl, right- in what, the bathroom?” she added, throwing her cigarette butt out the window and nesting in closer to Kurt.

“Jesus, Roisin, you really are something else. It was a woman, not a girl. I don’t swing that way-“ he caught the incredulous expressions of both Kurt and Roisin and corrected himself. “I aim for at least 18 now, Rosh. This one was at least 21.” He lied as they pulled back onto the Mass Pike.

“We should be there in about three hours, give or take. Just need to stop at the state liquor place in New Hampshire, get some nice aged whiskey for my friend or he won’t take too kindly to our showing up.” Logan said, lighting another cigar and letting out a terrific belch. “Good pizza…” he muttered.

“When was the last time you saw this person anyway, Logan?” Kurt asked. "I forgot what you said before."

“Um…about 60 years ago? Yeah, that sounds right. ‘Course, he’s probably someone else now. He does that, goes off, does something insanely stupid, gets killed, comes back as someone else, you know.” Logan said, as thought talking about the normal circle of life for tadpoles and frogs.

“What? He’s someone else now? He dies and comes back? Where the hell are you taking us anyway?” Roisin asked, her face scrunched up.

“Oh yeah, you slept through this part before. Friend of mine. His name is…well, I don’t actually know what name he’s going by now, could be anything. We called him Scimitar anyway. Yeah, his mutation is that he retains his memories and consciousness through death. So, he gets born again, usually in the same area, don’t know how he pulls that off…anyway, he remembers his previous life and eventually goes back to the same old place which has been an antique shop for the past century or so. He’s got some complicated way of putting all his money and papers in order so that he always gets everything back. Don’t know how he does that. If I actually paid taxes I’m pretty sure I’d fuck it up, you know?” Logan beamed at Roisin’s confused expression.

“Oh, and Roisin, you might want to make a new pair of stockings. I can see where they seem to have, um, ripped. “ He added, watching in the rearview mirror as Roisin was adjusting the blanket. She shot him a look of pure venom.

“You always struck me as someone who wouldn’t pay taxes, Logan.” Kurt said, seriously. “So how is this guy going to know who the hell you are? He’s gonna recognize you? Hasn’t he probably met a lot of people over the years?”

“That’s what the whiskey is for, Elf. I promised I'd always bring him some. Glenfiddich. Hopefully I can find some that's at least 30 years old. That should assuage any confusion or ill feeings about the last time we met."

"Like what?" asked Roisin.

"Well we fought about something stupid, a card game, actually, and then he sort of got killed. Mortar." Logan said quietly, and Kurt and Roisin just looked at each other.

"Um, Logan, if the last time you saw this guy, he was, well...dead- how do you know he's there now?" Kurt asked.

"Actually Xavier mentioned something about an antique store in Maine run by a friend of mine a few years ago. He showed me what he'd bought from him- a bayonet just like the ones we had. I just can't remember what Xavier said he was going by now. Charles something or other. I guess we'll know when we get there, right? " Logan cracked his knuckles loudly and they drove oto tto the night.