The Heart is a Lonely Hunter

THE HEART IS A LONELY HUNTER CHAPTER SIXTEEN (NC-17)
Disclaimers Apply

A/N Goddess Foxfeather, Queen of Mad Plotbunnies, you are feeding my sweet tooth. Thanks!!! InterNutter, TC and Maxwell Pink are ten kinds of wonderful for archiving! Readers/Reviewers: You make my toes curl with your specialness. And the Killer Kitties (tm) haven't been seen for a while, so I'd watch your collective back...


Sunday was, by and large, uneventful. Uneventful for everyone but Kitty, that is. "Half Pint! Get outta bed _now _ !" Logan's words were punctuated his words by pounding on Kitty's door harder than necessary.
Kitty made a snorting noise and pulled a pillow over her heard only to be jolted roughly awake by Logan shouting as loud as he dared, "Kitty! Ass outta bed NOW or I'm yanking you out by your ankles!" Logan stifled a snort as he heard her hit the floor and curse softly.
"It's six a.m.," she complained through the door. "Why do I need to be up this early on a Sunday for? Did I promise to go to Mass with Kurt or something?" Kitty sat on the floor, blinking, for several minutes, until she realized that Logan was not going to answer her. _Damn it... _ Kitty shoved herself to her feet and stumbled, still barely awake, to the door. Logan stood on the other side, his jaw set and eyes narrowed. "Eep."
"Get some clothes on. You're helping me fix the drainpipe then we're having a talk... Outside in five." He stalked off down the stairs, leaving Kitty feeling painfully nervous.
She dressed hastily, layering on as much as she could, trying to think of what Logan could possibly want to talk to her about. _Okay, he already knows I broke the pipe...maybe he just wants to know why. I'll be mostly honest...I wanted to get out...Just won't tell him why...Damn it...I have the worst luck lately! _ She did not meet anyone in the hallway as she trundled down the stairs, silently cursing the man for waking her up before the sun was even properly in the sky. As Kitty rounded the corner of the house, her heart sank. Logan had his toolbox, several lengths of pipe, and a scowl. "Um, good morning?"
"I ain't had coffee yet so don't 'good morning' me!" he snapped. He glared at her a moment longer then set to work pulling off the old pipe. Kitty shifted uneasily from one foot to the other, unsure of what Logan was going to ask her to do and not willing to ask, just in case he had a task in . S. Suddenly, he turned to her and said "What the Hell were you thinking, shimmying down the drainpipe? You could've broke your fool neck!"
Kitty jerked in surprise and opened and shut her mouth a few times, all explanations flyinom hom her head. Finally, she squeaked, "I just wanted to get out and think for a while!"
"Use the front door!" he growled. "Kitty, this," he jerked his thumb at the ruined drainpipe, "was a stupid thing to do."
She felt her face turn red as she stammered, "I just didn't want to run into anyone...I was worried if I phased down from my room that I'd meet someone and I'd have to tell 'em where I was going..."
Logan held up his hand to stop her words. "Kitty, I know I sometimes treat you like you're a little girl, but it's time I taught you something that could be useful in situations like that, something no little girl should say."
Kitty felt her eyes grow wide as Logan crunched through the grass to and and put one hand on each of her shoulders. "Wh...what's that?"
Logan looked her earnestly in the eyes and said, as if instructing a simple child, "There's two words to remember whenever people get in your face and you want to be left alone..."
"Go away?"
He snorted. "Even better... repeat after me...'Fuck off!'."
Kitty felt like giggling. "Logan!"
"Say it!" Logan shook her gently, "Fuck off!"
Kitty _did _ giggle then. "Fuck off!"
Logan smiled and let her go. "Well, next time you say it, sound like you mean it...don't giggle or they won't take you seriously." He turned back to the work at hand and Kitty relaxed marginally, at least until he said, "So what's this I hear about you going turboslut?"
"What?" she shrieked. "Who said that? I'll kick their ass!"
Logan grabbed her arm to keep her from storming off and said pacifically, "No one said anything like that...I have eyes and ears, Kitty. I heard how worried the girls were about you, about how you left here yesterday dressed like...well, like the wet dream of most guys in Bayviland and I see how tense you and Kurt are around each other." He rocked back on his heels, his eyes demanding honesty from her. "Kitty, I know Kurt's side of things...want to enlighten me as to yours?"
Kitty ducked her head, feeling trivial in her worries over Kurt's kissing Amanda, feeling like a fool for her actions yesterday and what she knew she was going to do at school on Monday. "I...I really don't want to say, Logan. I'm sorry...I just...it'd feel too weird."
He nodded, sucking on his tongue in thought. "Look, I'm pr sur sure I'm not the best person in the world for a girl to talk to..."
"Rogue and Jubilee talk to you..."
"Okay, for you to talk to about this sort of thing...I mean, most of me still sees you as a kid, even though I can see you growing inside and out pretty much right in front of me. Could you at least make an old man feel good and talk to Storm? She's a good listener and worries about you, too..."
Kitty could not help the smile that flitted across her face. "So...am I gonna have a foster _mother _ any time soon?"
Logan tried a withering glare but managed only a rueful glance. "Now, Half Pint, what makes you think there's anything going on between me and Storm?" He busied himself with the tools, avoiding her gaze.
Kitty giggled again. "You are ute ute when you're in denial. Does she know? All of us girls know...she's got it bad for you, always staring at you, those weird little smiles... and you! You get so grumpy when she's not around!"
"I'm only grumpy," he said, rising to his feet and tossing her a length of pipe, "because she makes the best coffee and when she's gone, I have to drink Remy's brew that tastes like shi...crap."
"Sure, Logan. Keep telling yourself that and you'll believe it..." Kitty giggled again when Logan threw her another glare, only to break into a grin when he saw her smirk.
"Tell you what, Kitty...you patch things up with Kurt by Friday...really patch 'em up, none of this airheaded, giggly, girly crap you're trying to pull, and I'll stand up on the dining room table next Friday night during dinner and announce to any one who will listen that I am in love with Storm."
Kitty felt her jaw drop. "You mean it?"
_Fuck. What've I just gotten myself into? _ "Yeah, I mean it..."
"It's a deal, then!" Kitty did a little jig to herself at the thought of Logan telling all and sundry just how he felt about Storm. _One or two more days of this...seduction or whatever it is Tabby promised would work, then I'll be nice and normal again...Maybe three days. Depends on Amanda and if she keeps her dainty claws off Kurt tomorrow... _

The next morning...

Jubilee was nice and warm and did not want to move at all, but Remy was pushing her away gently. "You suck," she grumbled.
"Only when ya ask nice," he said into the crook of her neck. "C'mon, you gonna be late..."
"If you were so worried about me being late, you should've just let me ride with Scott and Kurt...I wouldn't be in the parking lot making out with them!"
"I hafta kill 'em if dat happen," he said with mock-seriousness. "C'mon, it jus' a few hour...we kin continue at de house later..."
Jubilee smiled her best "pretty please" smile and said "How about sooner?" Leaning closer, across the gearshift and a collection of take out coffee cups, she whispered into his ear, "Meet me out here at lunch and we can...talk..."
"Talk? Bout what?" he asked, grinning in agreement.
"Dunno...stuff. The weather, school, the fact I'm not wearing underwear. You know, stuff!" At Remy's sudden jerk of surprise, she grinned. "Later, Gumbo!" With one last kiss, she was out of the car and heading towards the school. _God, I love an easy man...so long as it's Remy... _
"Jubilee!" Kitty's exasperated voice rang across the grassy span of schoolyard between the main entrance and the gym. "Jubes! C'mere!"
A small crowd was gathered on one side of yellow hazard tape, a small canyon between the students and the gym. "What's up?" the Asian girl asked, nearing the Xavier Institute contingent.
"Amara," Kurt supplied, sliding one protective arm around Kitty when he saw Duncan Matthews head their way, "has flipped out."
"So what else is new?" Jubilee snorted.
"She's taking Lance with her this time," Todd said, though, with his bandaged nosed, it sounded more like "She tabing Land wid her dis dime."
Indeed, Amara was flailing her arms wildly, gesticulating as she yelled at Lance in what seemed to be Latin, while Lance interjected with "Amara!' and "What?" every few sentences.
"Dude, what the Hell..." Jubilee breathed. She was referring to both the scene and Kitty. Her friend was dressed in as little as possible, shivering slightly in the cold air. Her jeans were so low as to necessitate her sitting with her back to the wall all day, unless she wanted to give the world a show, and a long-sleeve sweater that laced up the front in some paen to Medieval fashion, exposing more cleavage than most women twice her age had. "Wow, Kit...you look..."
"Damn, baby, what're you doing with him, looking like that?" Duncan Matthew's booming voice cut across the crowd. Even Lance and Amara paused in their arguing, taking in the situation, only to start up again, louder. The crowd was torn between the Bickering Bickersons1 and what was slowly shaping up to be a lopsided fight over Kitty.
"Matthews," Kitty ground out between clenched teeth, "leave me alone..."
He merely smirked and sidled up to Kitty, on the opposite side as Kurt. He made no small show of checking her out, whistling appreciatively when his eyes reached her rear. "Little more flesh than I usually like, but you gotta have something to hold on to, t?" t?" he said loudly, raising some ribald hterhter. "Though, I kind figured Wagner here for more of the exotic-type-thin, dark, easy...at least, that's who I saw you kissing Friday night!"
If Duncan had been expecting Kitty to burst into tears at this, he was sadly mistaken. Before Kurt could spit an invective or even threaten to raise a fist, Kitty broke from his grasp and turned to face Duncan full-on. With a sweet smile on her face, she tipped her chin to look into his eyes. "Duncan?"
"Yes, Pretty Kitty?"
"Fuck off!"

Lance and Amara almost missed the fight. She had run out of things to yell about him defacing the school while on probation and he could only say her name so many times. "Lance," she sighed finally, wearily, "do you have any idea what I'm so upset about this?"
"Because whoever did it could get arrested?" He was actually flattered that she was so worried.
"No, dumbass. Did you even look up the meaning of t Or Or ask me?"
"Huh? I got it from that book of poems and junk you had in your room..."
"It says," she blushed and stepped closer to whisper in his, "_, "_I will fuck you in the ass, and have you give me some good head _ ."2
Lance felt equally embarrassed and amused. "Er...that's not nearly as romantic as I'd hoped..." He could not help it, he started laughing. Loudly.
Amara glared at him at first, his humor slowly seeping into her. "That's not that funny..."
"Yes it is!" He was doubled over. "No one but you and me are gonna know what this says, and that makes it all the funnier!"
She started giggling, then outright laughing. "At least it's _half _ right..." She made a vaguely obscene gesture referring to oral sex. "Later, anyway."
Lance looked at her as if to speak, but the sudden spate of shouting caught their attention. Kitty was in Duncan Matthew's face, Patricia Garrison being held back by two other cheerleaders and Jubilee holding tight to Kurt's arm, his holo-disguised still dangerously feral in his anger. It all went to Hell when Duncan raised his hand against Kitty. To Lance, the world seemed to slow down to molasses-like speed. He saw Kitty seeing the descending hand, her eyes go wide then flare with new anger, her own fist drawing back, but she was too slow. Duncan's hand made contact with a resounding slap, the crowd falling into stunned silence. Kitty staggered backwards a few steps, her lip and nose bleeding slightly, before she caught her balance and surged forward. Jubilee had let go of Kurt and he was reaching for Kitty's arm when her fist caught Duncan in the throat. "Katzchen!" he cried, the only clear word Lance could make out over the swell in voices.
"What the Hell is going on here?" Principal Kelly strode forward, the crowd parting like the Red Sea. Kitty still had her fist clenched, Duncan on the ground before her. "Miss Pryde, my office, now! Bring your books!" He took her arm roughly and dragged her behind him, forcing her to jog to keep up. Kurt made a dash to stay by her side, but Principal Kelly tossed over his shoulder, "You're next ,Wagner! Go to class! All of you!"
Kitty felt like dying. _This _ , she thought dimly, _was so not part of my plan... _

1 An old comic where the couple is always fighting. Kind oke tke the Lockhorns.
2 The beginning of Catullus 16:
PEDICABO EGO VOS ET IRRUMABO
I will fuck you in the ass, and have you give me some good head. (At least, according to the Latin phrase book my friend has)