Playing with Fire

Still not mine, still suck at titles, still don't care. ^_~


LUNCH ANYONE?


Logan prowled down the corridor, doing his damnedest to look surly and intimidating - not that it took much effort. He didn't want to make conversation with any of the rugrats this morning, he just wanted to make sure all the new kids hauled their lazy asses outa bed in time for breakfast and their Danger Room session. It was well past time to start whipping them into shape. he knew that Chuck and 'Ro wanted 'em to get a chance to 'just be kids', and that the newbies weren't necessarily even expected to join the 'team', but he figured they'd been working under the misapprehension that this was some kinda camp for long enough. The way things had taken a turn for the militantly anti-mutant lately, it was time for them to stop screwin' around with their powers and get serious about learning to protect themselves and each other. Even if they decided they never wanted to be X-Men, Logan couldn't imagine that being a mutant was _ever_ going to be a safe thing - at least not in their lifetimes, and probably not even in his...

He suppressed a snarl and continued down the hall, pausing to pound on Roberto and Ray's door and growl at them to get their butts downstairs.
"Last one in the Danger Room gets fifty push-ups, and *anyone* late gets clean-up duty in the garage for a month," he added as incentive, listening with satisfaction to the sounds of the two boys scrambling out of their improvised 'beds'.

That was the last of 'em. Sam, farmboy that he was, had been up well before dawn and was actually working on some finish carpentry in one of the guest rooms. _At least one of the newbies has a decent work ethic,_ he thought with some approval. _Thought 'Ro's right in his case, that kid needs to *be* a kid more._

He'd actually had to threaten Bobby with the claws to get the little trouble-maker up and moving, which had scared Jamie so bad that he'd fallen over his own feet and duped himself. Logan's lip twitched at the memory, but he quickly converted the incipient smile into a not _too_ menacing snarl for Bobby's benefit as the teen emerged from the boys' bathroom wearing nothing but a towel and an irritating grin. After catching sight of the taciturn Canadian's face the boy sobered quickly enough and headed for his room at a trot, clutching his towel in place.

Logan suppressed a sigh as he turned to watch the boy's retreating back. He didn't really want the kids scared of him, he thought with a twinge of remorse, but he'd made the mistake of getting too close to the first batch and he didn't want to repeat the mistake. If keeping a little distance between himself and them meant they ended up frightened of him, well, he could live with that a lot easier than he could live with caring too much when they eventually up and died on him. He had too many people who meant too much to him already. More, he knew, than he'd let get close to him in a _long_ time. He couldn't actually remember any of the others any more, but he knew that they'd existed none-the-less, just like he _knew_, somewhere deep in his gut, that losing them had left holes in him that could never be filled. Even if he could no longer remember what had caused the ache of loss, it was still there.

He scrubbed a calloused hand through his perpetually disheveled hair and suppressed another sigh as Bobby disappeared into his room. It was better not to care... really it was. Only, why did he have such a hard time believing that any more?

_Speakin' of caring too much_... He snorted in irritation with himself as he turned again and continued towards the end of the hall. _Might as well check and see how the Elf is doing this morning,_ he smirked at the thought. _Kid probably won't so much as change position before lunch time,_ the feral mutant thought with rather dark satisfaction. _Sure put his furry ass through the meat-grinder last night._

He hadn't said as much to the kid, but he'd actually been impressed with his performance the night before. He'd taken everything he dished out for almost three hours and still been on his feet when it was over. Admittedly he'd only been that way through sheer, bloody-minded force of will, but that in itself was something the Wolverine respected. Logan seriously doubted whether any of the other kids, with the possible exception of Shades, could've stayed on their feet against everything he'd thrown at the runt, and even if they had he'd guarantee they would've been moaning, whining, complag wrg wrecks the second it was over. The Elf had just stood in the middle of the suddenly quiet room, sweat streaming off him and making dark patches in his fur, while he registered that it was _over_. Then he'd turned to the older man with a smile that was more a tooth grinding attempt to conceal pain than his normal good humor, thanked him for the work-out, and limped back to the locker room without another word.

Logan had pushed down his concern at how uncharacteristically subdued the boy had been, not just last night, but all week. The only time he'd seen him really animated had been while the sims had been running and then he'd just dealt with them - quickly and with brutal efficiently and with absolutely none of his usual enthusiasm or humor. He'd followed the kid silently back to the locker room, ready to catch him if he hit the floor, but the runt had managed to get all the way through his shower before he finally collapsed on a bench - wearing nothing but his shorts, but too tired for the moment to finish getting dressed. Even his tail had been still and Logan had wondered if he'd have to carry the kid up to his room when he was done. He had just shrugged a flannel on over his wife-beater and was debating whether to carry the Elf or make him walk, when one surprisingly alert golden eye had cracopenopen and the kid had _grinned_ at him.

"We _must_ do that again sometime, mein Herr," he'd said with a weak chuckle. "It was very...invigorating."

"Invigorating was it, Misfit?" he'd rumbled back, feeling an unexpected smile stretching his face. "Sounds like I didn't work ya hard enough. If I wasn't already clean I'd haul your sorry carcass back in there for another round."

"It's a shame we're all cleaned up then, ja?" he'd responded, finally moving to pull on a t-shirt and a baggy pair of cargo pants.

"Yup, sure is," Logan had grinned ferally back at him. "Looks like I'll just have ta make good on my promise to get ya plastered then, eh bub?"

"Oh, you're welcome to try mein Herr. You are _very_ welcome to try!" And if that hadn't been a challenge, Logan didn't know what was. _That_ sounded more like the Elf he knew.

He'd been pleasantly surprised to see that the kid was actually steady on his feet and didn't seem too much the worse for wear, although there were gonna have to be some pretty interesting bruises hidden undhat hat fur come morning. He'd been even more pleased when the younger man had shown the sense to drink a _lot_ of water before he even touched the beer Logan offered him - plus he'd pretty much polished off most of the snack food the older man had stashed in his room as well.

Over the next three hours he'd nonchalantly thrown back around half a case of dark German beer, while maintaining his end of the conversation with _relative_ cogency - although he had taken a disturbing turn for the musical somewhere around the fifth beer. Logan had had to remind himself that the kid was actually over the legal drinking age in a country where beer was considered a food group, as well as having spent most of his formative years in a sub-culture that probably wasn't the most straight-laced.

_God the runt can put it away - I just hope it stayed there. Too bad that being able to hold your liquor isn't really considered a virtue in a sixteen year old,_ the older man thought with grim amusement as he headed down the hall.
He was still a good fifteen feet from the kid's door when his enhanced senses registered a combination of sounds and smells that stopped him dead in his tracks, eyes widening in surprise.

_Well shit!_ He was so surprised he nearly said it aloud. He continued on a few feet, not really believing the evidence of his senses for the f tim time in years, and then stopped again as his brain supplied images to go with what he was very definitely hearing and smelling - and God if that wasn't disturbing he didn't know what was.

"Unfuckingbelievable!" he muttered at the frantic sounds he could now hear clearly through the thick oak door. He turned abruptly on his heel and strode back the way he'd come, glowering in earnest now. Just because he didn't care what they did in private didn't mean that he wanted to know when they were doing it!

_Jesus, Elf sure as hell has stamina, if nothing else,_ he though with grudging, if somewhat disgusted, respect.

He resisted the urge to plug his hears and hold his nose as he retraced his steps. It seemed that now that he knew what was going on the sounds and smells permeated the entire hall, although he _knew_ that anyone else could probably stand right outside the damn door and have not a clue what was going on. _Thank God for small mercies._

_Ya'd think after all this time, I'd be used ta that kind of thing,_ he thought sardonically as he headed down the stairs. It wasn't like he hadn't heard or smelled _way_ more than he would've liked more times than he could count - even with most of his memories missing he knew that much. But, knowing exactly what random strangers were doing in the motel room next door is an entirely different matter than knowing that two kids he lived with, trained with, and had become more attached to than he liked to admit, were going at it just down the hall.

He heard footsteps on the stairs behind him as Shades came down at his usual clip.

"Hey, Logan!" he called. "You've got the new kids in the Danger Room this morning?" he asked as the older man paused and turned on the stairs.

"Ayup," he grunted laconically as the teen came abreast of him.

"That's good then. I want to take the team through some drills this afternoon, around two, if you want to come help beat them into shape."

"Eh? Sounds good Scooter. I'll be there."

The X-Men's leader looked at him quizzically. "Anything wrong Logan?"

_You have *no* idea_ he wanted to reply, but simply shook his head in the negative as he hit the bottom of the stairs and made a bee-line for the coffee.

He'd been considering warning everyone off the Elf's room for the rest of the morning, just to give him some time to recover. _Sure as hell looks like he didn't need that._ Now, there was no question in his mind that he'd better warn them off, if for an entirely different reason than he'd had in mind. No good purpose could possibly be served by having any of the kids find out what was going on. _Guess I'll have to cover for the Half-Pint too now,_ he thought in consternation. _Damn, those kids are gonna owe me one!_

Kitty poked her head quite literally _through_ the door to the hallway and peered cautiously around. Seeing no signs of life, she quickly phased the rest of the way into the hall and turned in the direction of the girls wing of the 'dormitories', the remains of her shirt clutched in a small bundle to her chest.

Everyone else _should_ be down getting ready for lunch by now, but she didn't want to run into someone straggling down late if she could help. She did _not_ want to try and explain her current attire and her prolonged absence if there was any way she could avoid it. She had slunk carefully past the head of the stairs and was feeling pretty confident that she was 'home free', just two doors down from her room, when the sound of a throat being cleared behind her stopped her dead in her tracks.

_God, I hope that stays a figure of speech,_ she thought nervously as she turned slowly, trying to ignore the butterflies in her stomach and the flush burning its way up her cheeks. She was fairly proud that she had neither jumped right out of her skin nor bolted in terror, although she almost wished she had (run, that is) as she forced herself to face Mr. Logan where he stood, face expressionless, at the head of the stairs.

She stood there for what seemed like a lifetime - although maybe that was only because her entire brief life seemed to be flashing before her eyes - seeing nothing but his stony face and waiting for the explosion she was sure would come. She had _really_ hoped to avoid the Wolverine until _after_ she'd had a chance to shower and change. Kurt had told her that there was no point trying to fool the surly Canadian, but Kitty had hoped to try anyway. Now she was remembering exactly why.

"Um, Mr. Logan. Like...uh...hi..." she squeaked before her voice trailed away into nervsilesilence.

His nostrils flared as his eyes traveled slowly from her bare feet to her unkempt hair, lingering meaningfully on Kurt's ratty old t-shirt hanging on her like a tent as well as the wadded shirt she still clutched to her chest, until she shoved it behind her back. She shifted nervously from foot to foot as the silence stretched uncomfortably, rapidly formulating and discarding possible excuses or justifications and wishing he'd just get it over with - yell at her, hand out punishment, and let her crawl away to die quietly of embarrassment. His examination made her feel like a piece of meat he was checking for possible freshness and she had just about reached her breaking point, was actually on the verge of a pre-emptive strike of non-stop babble, when he slowly raised one eyebrow and snorted quietly in what _might_ have been amusement.

"Ya might want ta consider changing into somethin' of yours before you go down for lunch Half-Pint," he told her in a neutral tone, voice no more gruff than normal. "Oh, and Red was lookin' for ya earlier - talkin' 'bout shoppin' or some snon-non-sense." Kitty thought her heart might just stop as she thought about what Jean might have 'heard' if she had been 'looking' telhicahically. She wasn't sure she was going to be able to face the older girl again.

"I told her ya'd turn up eventually and ta leave ya alone to enjoy your mornin' in peace and quiet if that's what ya wanted," he gave her a meaningful look and her heart lurched as he continued. "She wasn't too happy, but she decided she didn't really need ya bad enough ta justify scannin' for ya." His eyebrow was still raised slightly and as he spoke, one corner of his mouth had quirked up to join it.

Kitty felt her stomach flip-flop uncomfortably as she let out a breath she hadn't even realized she'd been holding. Not only did he know just where she'd been and what she'd been doing, he apparently had known all morning. And he _hadn't_ come charging in, claws out and threatening mayhem? He _wasn't_ lecturing her, or exercising his legendary vocabulary to verbally rip her a new asshole?

"Who are you and what have you done with Mr. Logan?" she asked before she could stop herself. _Oh God, I'm dead now, I can't believe I just said that._ She cringed in anticipatory fear, but his only response was for both of his eyebrows to shoot up briefly, almost disappearing into his hairline, accompanied by another snort and what could only be called a smile. A small and not very amused smile, but a smile none-the-less. _This is getting *really* freaky._

"Squirt, what goes on behind closed doors around here ain't none of my business, or anybody else's for that matter, so long as no one gets hurt,_ he rumbled at her. I don't see as anyone's gotten hurt here, so I don't see as I need to stick my nose in where it wasn't asked for and ain't wanted. You think differently?" He raised one eyebrow again, questioningly this time, and she shook her head vehemently, not quite trusting herself to speak.

"Didn't think so. Now, like I said, why don't you run along and get yerself cleaned up fer lunch, before tongues start to wag 'bout where you disappeared to all mornin', huh? I've got some stuff here fer the Elf - 'Ro figured he couldn't afford to miss breakfast _and_ lunch, and she's probably right." For the first time Kitty looked down from his face and noticed with surprise that he was carrying a large tray in each hand, laden with assorted high calorie items. The combination of foods was just about enough to turn her stomach, though she had no doubt Kurt would plough through them with gusto. It also reminded her that she hadn't eaten since the popcorn she'd had at midnight the night before and she was _hungry_.

"Go on Half-Pint. Get out of here and get fed, because," he glanced at the grandfather clock at the head of the stairs, "in about two hours I get you and the rest of the team in the Danger Room. Got it broken in _real_ good, between th'Elf last night and the new kids this mornin', and now it's all ready for you guys." He was still smiling, but it had taken a decided turn for the evil now. "Oh, and Half-Pint? Don't be late." And then he had turned and was striding down the boys' hall.

She stood frozen for a moment longer, then turned and practically ran the rest of the way to her room. Not even bothering with the door, she phased right through the wall and promptly collapsed against it, sliding slowly down to the floor. She couldn't _believe_ he'd let her off scot-free. Mr. Logan knew perfectly well how she'd spent the better part of the last ten hours or so and he _didn't care?_

"Unfuckingbelievable," she murmured dazedly to herself, too shocked to care about her language. "With luck like that, I should clean out everyone's piggy banks and head to Atlantic City - I could win a fortune and probably not even get carded!"

With a sigh she levered herself up and collected a towel and assorted bathroom paraphernalia. She'd have to hurry if she was going to make lunch, but she wasn't _about_ to go down without a shower. At the moment she doubted that anyone would really need Mr. Logan's enhanced sense of smell to figure out exactly what she'd been up to, and she didn't really think it would make a great topic of conversation over lunch.

Kurt lay sprawled in an inelegant heap across his 'bed', eyes slightly glazed and a ridiculous smile plastered on his face as he watched her disappear through the door. he could still smell her, feel her warmth on the blanket beside him, and his tail swayed and curled above him in contented languor. he twisted his fingers into one edge of the blanket and dragged it to his face, breathing deeply of her scent where it lingered in the fabric, then let it fall with a quiet sigh as his eyes drifted shut. God, he was tired, but, for the first time all week, it was a good tired - a satisfying, bone-deep exhaustion. He didn't think there was a tense muscle left in his entire body. _Ach, I think that could be an alternative to yoga,_ he thought with sleepy amusement. _Just as relaxing and *much* more fun!_ He might have laughed at the thought if he had the energy.

Some dim corner in the back of his brain was trying to tell him that he shouldn't feel this good, that what he'd done was _wrong._ Just now, though, he couldn't be bothered listening to it. He probably would later, more's the pity, but for now all he had the energy for was to lie there and feel insufferably pleased with how things had turned out. The only thing that could make him feel better would be to have Kitty's warm nakedness pressed up against him still as he drifted off to sleep. Plenty of time to worry about having sex with his 'little sister' and the whole virginity issue later. Really...

It was some consolation that she really hadn't wanted to leave any more than he had wanted her to. Unfortunately, reality had reared its ugly head. Kurt had been peripherally aware of the assorted sounds of life going on around them for some time. Due, however, to the extra sound-proofing the Professor had had installed in _all_ the rooms this time around, he had no doubt that Kitty had still been blissfully unaware of their house mates bustling about their lives on the other side of his bedroom door. This ended abruptly when one pair of footsteps had halted just outside, immediately followed by a sharp knock.

"Hey, 'Crawler! You alive in there dude?" came Evan's muffled voice through the thick wood. They had both jumped as if shocked and looked, simultaneously and with identical expressions of horror, at the _unlocked_ door.

_Oh Gott, don't let him open the door, *don't* let him open the door..._ The words had run non-stop through his head as Kitty had scrambled frantically for the clothes she had discarded yet again. Despite the tension inherent in the situation, Kurt had been completely incapable of keeping his eyes off her nude body as she struggled into the jeans she had retrieved from a pile on the floor. _Oh. Mein. Gott. She is *lovely*,_ it had felt like a prayer and he had been unable to move. He'd known he should rush for the door, stall Evan, do _something_, but all he had been able to do was stare at her, not even aware that he'd stopped breathing.

He'd been jerked back to reality by the sound of Evan's hands rattling the door knob and his voice again, indistinct through the thick oak-paneled door. "Hey Kurt, come on man!"

_Oh Gott, he's coming in!_ he had been about to 'port to the door in an effort to keep the younger boy from actually entering when they'd been rescued by another voice in the corridor.

"What the heck are you doing Evan?" Scott hadn't sounded amused. "Didn't you hear what Logan said? Or do you actually _want_ an extra hour in the Danger Room when the rest of us are done?" he'd asked in an exasperated tone.

"No way man. But come on, Kurt won't mind. I mean, shit Scott, missing one meal's one thing, but the 'Crawler bailing on two meals in a row? Dude, something is fucked here and you know it. This ain't like the rest of the week - y'know, grabbing stuff on the go and avoiding us. He hasn't so much as stuck one fuzzy, pointed blue ear outa that room all morning." The younger boy had sounded concerned and Kurt had felt a twinge of guilt at how he'd behaved to his friends all week. He'd told himself that they probably hadn't even noticed, but obviously he'd been wrong.

"I know Evan," Scott had replied, his voice also laced with concern. "But Logan said to just give his some time and space man, and you know he's right. Kurt'll come around, we've just gotta let him do it in his own time."

"But Scott, it just ain't like him..."

"No buts Ev. You weren't around when he first got here. Just trust me when I tell you that Logan _knows what he's talking about_, okay? I don't know what it's about, but something's riding him, and he needs to get it sorted out in his own head before he tries to deal with us." He'd fallen into 'Fearless Leader' mode, his tone confident and commanding. Kurt had felt more than a little embarrassed to be overhearing this conversation, even more so knowing that Kitty had been listening too.

"Ya gotta know that if there was anything seriously wrong, the Professor'd handle it. Come on, let's go help with lunch before Amara has a hissy."
"Yeah, I know man. You're right and all. It's just kinda quiet around here without the 'Crawler raisin' seven kindsa hell, y'know?"

"Don't worry Evan, he'll be back in business in no time - and then I'll remind you of this moment when you start bitching about his practical jokes again." The older boy had laughed then, and Kurt had let his breath out in relief at the sound of their steps retreating down the hall, the sound echoed by Kitty as she let out an explosive sight and slumped to the floor next to him.

"That was close," she'd whispered to him with a nervous smile, leaning against his shoulder. He had smiled absently at her, still focused on his friends' conversation as they headed for the stairs.

"Now, if _Kitty_ doesn't show up for lunch, I'm gonna sick Jean on her," Scott had been saying. "We've got a Danger Room session this afternoon and it's not like her to just disappear without saying anything to anyone."

"Yeah, you're right there man," Evan had agreed. "Now, if Fuzz Butt there weren't outa commission, I'd bet my best board that she was off somewhere with him!"

"Oh yeah, and probably up to no good!" Scott had agreed with a laugh, which Kurt had quietly echoed as their voices had faded in the distance as they headed down stairs.

"What's so funny Fuzzy?" Kitty had asked with some asperity. She had been burrowing under his arm and Kurt had forgotten that she couldn't hear anything the other teens had said after they started to walk away. "That could have been a first class, grade A disaster you know," but she was smiling again and he realized with pleased surprise that, in her panic to get covered, she had grabbed her own ruined shirt, which was hanging open in a _most_ attractively revealing manner.

"Ja Liebe, that would not have been my first choice of how to come out of the closet, so to speak. But catastrophe has been averted." As he'd spoken, he'd given her a somewhat predatory grin and his hands had drifted, all of their own accord (really), to the soft, warm flesh beneath her shirt. "I would thank Scott for his timely intervention, but then I'd have to tell him why, wouldn't I?" His focus had narrowed to the soft pink of her lips as his hands had continued to roam.

"I guess he'll have to go through life without knowing that he has our undying gratitude then," she'd whispered, and her warm breath had brushed his lips. He wasn't sure which of them had closed the gap then, and didn't really care, as he felt her lips - soft and warm and insistent - against his own. His tail had wrapped around her waist and he'd pulled her, unresisting, into his lap, gasping at the feel of her hands moving with increasing confidence and familiarity over the smooth, hard planes of his chest and belly.

He'd been on the verge of divesting her of her clothes yet again, when the last bit of Scott and Evan's conversation had drifted, unbidden, through his lust-fogged brain.

"Kaetzchen," he'd almost moaned as he pushed her gently away. "You've got to leave now, Liebe." He'd been intensely aware of his own continuted nudity and was more than a little embarrassed by how obvious his 'interest' in her was - as well as how rapidly it had developed.

She'd looked petulant, sullen and ready to argue and he'd had to laugh. She'd looked like nothing so much as a thwarted six year old. Her attitude had quickly changed, however, when he'd informed her that she could expect an unscheduled telepathic visit from Jean if she didn't make an appearance at lunch. That bit of information had effectively squelched her ardor and sent her into a frenzy as she rushed to get back to her room.

Kurt had watched in amused appreciation as she'd struggled out of her pants again (his really, since she'd grabbed whatever had come most quickly to hand in her earlier panic) as well as her ruined shirt, trading for her own jeans and his ratty old t-shirt. It was somewhat less incriminating than her own torn blouse if someone caught her in the hall. Then she'd given him one last kiss before he had collapsed on his 'bed' and she had disappeared through his door.

Now he again breathed deeply of the lingering scent of her, as well as the mingled aroma of their passion and smiled. _I may be no match for Logan, but sometimes it's *good* to have enhanced senses._

He was just beginning to drift off to sleep, total exhaustion as well as a serious calorie deficit overwhelming his determination to shower and go down for lunch himself, when the sound of his door swinging open jerked him partway back to consciousness.

He couldn't even bother to open his eyes to see who'd come in, but he hoped, in a vague kind of way, that it wasn't anyone who'd be terribly shocked or offended to walk in on him lying there stark naked. _Oh well,_ he thought hazily, _if it bothers them, then it's their own verdammt fault for walking in without knocking...besides...at least I'm...on my...belly..._ and then even his thoughts trailed away.

He had actually lost all interest in his phantom visitor and was almost completely unconscious when he was startled again by a large hand descending on his shoulder.

_Now *that's* a problem!_ he thought as he surged gracefully to his feet, dropping automatically into a fighting crouch.

There was a short bark of laughter, and his eyes finally focused on Logan standing in front of him, arms crossed, one eyebrow raised, and a look of intense amusement lurking in his shadowed brown eyes. Kurt dropped to the floor in a boneless heap, the adrenaline that had gotten him up and moving disappearing rapidly in the absence of an immediate threat.

"Y'know Elf, you're a _bit_ more intimidating with some clothes on," the older man rumbled, "not much, but a bit." His deep, gravelly voice vibrating with suppressed laughter, he reached down and grabbed Kurt's pants. "Here, put these on Misfit, that's just a bit more fuzzy blue anatomy than I really wanta look at while I talk to you," and he tossed the beige cargos at the younger man.
Kurt caught them clumsily and stared stupidly at them, as if wondering just what he was supposed to do with them, vaguely noticing at the same time that, despite his complaint, the older man hadn't bothered to look away. He struggled briefly with the idea of getting dressed before dropping the pants with a snort and stating tiredly, "more effort than it's worth," and instead flipped an end of the blanket he was sitting on across his lap. "Like it or lump it mein Freund, it's the best you're getting," he informed the taciturn Canadian. He noticed with a kind of detached interest that his accent had thickened and he was slurring his words a bit.

"Okay Elf, he snorted in disgust, obviously irritated by Kurt's condition. "Ya know kid, sometimes I don't think you've got the sense your god gave a goat. I'm sure it's just a thing of beauty that you and the Half-Pint got your differences...worked out...in such a _satisfying_ way, but did it ever occur to you that it might have been a good idea to get a little rest and maybe actually _eat_ something." His voice was gruff and exasperated, but Kurt caught the undercurrent of amusement as well.

"Oh, but a man can _sleep_ anytime Herr Logan," he mumbled tiredly, with a vaguely self-satisfied smile. "Besides," he added, peering slyly from beneath his lowered lashes, "I _did_ eat something."

Logan's eyebrows shot right into his hairline at that, and he barked a short, harsh laugh. "I _meant_ somethin' with calories Misfit. And, by the way, that was an image I really didn't need." He swallowed rather heavily and, if Kurt hadn't been almost certain that it was impossible, he would have sworn the normally stoic Canadian was blushing.

_I can't blame him if he is, I sure as hell am,_ he thought in startled a mazement. _Mein Gott, did I actually say that? Must eat and sleep...my brain is officially fried._

There was a moment of rather uncomfortable silence that Kurt couldn't be bothered to break, as his eyes drifted shut yet again.

"Okay kid," Logan announced dryly. "Time for good little elves to wake up and eat." Something in that statement rang a bell in his memory, and he cracked one eye open in a very sad attempt at a baleful glare.

"I am _not_ a toddler," he replied acidly, although his attempt at affronted dignity was somewhat ruined when he failed to stifle a jaw cracking yawn.

"No, just an idiot," the older man stated with amused certainty.

Kurt's only response was to stick out his tongue petulantly at him, as his one open eye drifted shut again. Both eyes snapped open with alacrity, however, at the distinctive 'snikt' inches from his face. One razor sharp claw hovered directly in front of his still protruding tongue.

"Stick that out at me again Misfit, and I just might cut it off," Logan rumbled menacingly.

Even though he knew it was a bluff, Kurt was suddenly wide awake, and his heart couldn't decide whether to race or stop altogether. There was just something about having a blade of any kind inches from his face that pushed all his panic buttons.

"Oh shit kid! You should _see_ your face!" Kurt relaxed as the claw was retracted with another 'snikt' and the sound of Logan's rumbling laughter filled the room. "Christ Elf, I thought you were gonna wet yerself!"

"Very funny Logan," he mumbled sulkily, "and don't take the Lord's name in vain," he added absently as an afterthought. _Oh, like I have any moral authority on *that* front lately,_ he thought with some discomfort. _If Father Dominic gives me a Hail Mary or Our Father for every time I've done that in the last week I'll be on my knees for hours! Forget my normal penance for just having a generally foul mouth._

"Sorry Elf," the older man responded, still chuckling softly, "but at least you're awake enough to eat now, eh?"

"Ja, ja," he replied, waving a hand vaguely. The tempting aroma of food was beginning to penetrate through the fog in his brain. "Have anything liquid?" he asked with a smile. "I don't think I have the energy to chew." _Sadly enough, I think I'm only half joking,_ he thought with amusement. To his surprise the older man stooped and grabbed a glass of something off a tray Kurt hadn't even noticed and passed it to the semi-conscious teen. It appeared to be chocolate mil, but further examination showed it to be one of those high energy drinks favored by body builders. It was thick, almost to the point of being chewy, and had a distinctively unattractive aroma and he didn't even stop for breath as he drained it in one gulp.

"Danke schoen," he told Logan as he set down the empty glass.

"Eh, well, thank 'Ro when you drag your ass outa here. She put it together for ya. Seems like yeh've managed ta get the whole damned house worryin' after ya." He snorted in amusement. "She read me the riot act this mornin' when I warned everyone off ya fer the day. Wanted ta know what the hell I thought I was doin', draggin' 'the poor boy' through an extended training session," he sing-songed in good-natured mockery. "Couldn't I tell ya'd had a bad enough week without adding insult to injury?" He snorted again. "You owe me one Elf, big time. I'm right at the top of 'Ro's shit list for now."

Kurt was torn between amusement at the man's predicament and discomfort at the knowledge that, apparently, he was the topic of worry and speculation for a significant number of his house mates.

_I have *got* to work on my technique,_ he thought with somewhat morbid humor. _Don't they know that I'm a carefree elf? Not a trouble in the world?_

Aloud he said, "sorry about that Logan, and thank you. I owe you two mein Freund. One for that and one for giving me the first decent night's sleep I've had all week." He grinned at the older man, feeling much more alert with something in his stomach, and grabbed a sandwich off the tray next to him. "I will have to remember to thank Frau Munroe for her thoughtfulness, ja?" he added, as he proceeded to virtually inhale the food.

"Ya know Elf. I'm not so sure I had anything to do with you gettin' some ret last night - however much ya _did_ get. ya might want ta thank someone else for that, eh?" and the older man flashed him a feral grin.

He couldn't be bothered answering as he continued to eat, absolutely starving now that he was more awake. He simply raised one indigo eyebrow at the gruff Canadian.

Conversation pretty much ceased at that point, Logan watching with amusement as the slightly built teen packed away enough food to keep any three grown men with normal metabolisms happy all day. By the time the furry teleporter had cleaned off both trays he was feeling very sleepy again. The food had given him only a temporary boost before the mental and physical exhaustion of the last twenty-four hours (not to mention the last week) set in again. Kurt slumped down onto his blanket and Logan was halfway to the door when the feral mutant stopped and fixed him with an almost predatory glare.

"By the way Misfit, I told the Half-Pint and I'll tell you. I don't give a damn what goes on behind closed doors around here - that's no one's business but yours and hers. _This_ is just for you though." His voice lowered until it rumbled deep in his chest - clear, deliberate and barely short of a growl. "You hurt her, or knock her up, and I'll be addin' a pair of fuzzy blue balls to my trophy collection."

One claw shot out for emphasis and Kurt had to quell the urge to swallow nervously - it didn't matter how often he saw them or how comfortable he was with their owner, it was always...disconcerting...at best to have them pointed at him. Instead he plastered on his best 'who me?' expression.

"Why Herr Logan," he responded in a tone that implied butter wouldn't melt in his mouth. "I didn't know you _had_ a trophy collection."

"I don't Elf, but I'm open to the idea of startin' one."

"I'll keep that in the forefront of my mind mein Freund," he answered with a sleepy grin.

"You do that Elf, you make damn sure you do that," and he was gone, the door closing quietly behind him.

Kurt rolled only his stomach with a contented sigh and inhaled deeply. _Oh yes, it's good to have the enhanced senses,_ he thought as he drifted off to sleep. For the first time all week he wasn't worried about his dreams.



Logan shook his and stifled a low growl as he exited the boy's room. He wasn't sure if he was more irritated or amused by the situation. When he'd poured the runt into bed the night before - correction, earlier that morning - he would've laid odds against him so much as waking up any time before noon. Hell, he'd run the kid through a meat-grinder and then gotten him so pissed he could hardly stand. He scraped one large, rough hand across the bristles on his jaw and shook his head again as he tried, unsuccessfully, to suppress a smile. He just couldn't believe that the little squirrel had managed to..._perform_...considering the shape he'd left him in. Probably wouldn't have believed it if he hadn't seen, heard and smelled the evidence for himself.

_Good God, that room frickin' reeks of sex!_ he thought with a grimace as he headed back down the stairs. _No wonder the little squirrel's so damned pleased with himself._

He inhaled deeply, trying to replace the overwhelming aroma of sex permeating the olfactory centers of his brain with the smells of lunch drifting up from below. He was only partially successful.

_All I can say is I sure as hell hope *this* takes care of his problem, whatever the hell it is. Cause if it doesn't help things it'll probably make them worse. One thing about sex is it ain't *ever* neutral._

He shook his head, trying not to worry about something that he couldn't control. But he couldn't help but wonder if any kind of serious relationship was really something the Elf needed right now. He knew, intellectually, that he was _supposed_ to be worried about Kitty, but she wasn't the one falling apart piece-meal lately, and besides, he'd much rather she were with the Elf than that Alvers creep. It had only been Chuck's insistence that she had to make her own mistakes that had kept him from..._warning_...the kid off. _Oh, who the hell am I kidding - beating the ever-loving shit outa him is more like it. And Scooter and the Elf woulda been *more* than happy to help. Eh, all water under the bridge now though. Gave Elf the obligatory warning, now it's up to them._

He snorted in combined amusement and consternation. _Shit, 'Ro and Chuck'll blow a gasket if they catch on. Sure hope those two can keep things under control, or at least at a low volume,_ He began to laugh quietly as another thought occurred to him. _Then again, it'd just about be worth the price of admission to see their faces when they figure out a couple of their 'kids' are growin' up a bit faster'n expected._

"Hrmph!" _Good thing Chuck don't believe in readin' the kids, or those two'd be in for a world of hurt. Don't know how justified it'd be though. Hell, we give 'em all the worries and responsibilities of adults, what can you really expect._ Really good thing Chuck had all that extra sound-proofing installed, or based on what he'd heard this morning, there'd be quite a few more folks privy to those kids' sex life than they'd probably like.

Another amusing possibility sprang to mind as he entered the kitchen and his quiet laughter became an all out guffaw that he didn't bother to stifle.

_Well, now we'll see if Red's really as virtuous as she's supposed to be. Her reaction when Kit shows up at lunch should tell it all, 'cause the Half-Pint'll probably be projectin' for all she's worth._

Ororo and Scott were giving him strange looks as he dropped the dirty dishes in the sink, leaving them for the clean-up crew. Ororo raised one elegant eyebrow at him in question, but his only response was to shrug and announce in a voice still choked with laughter, "just thinkin' 'Ro. Just thinkin'," as he headed outside for lunch.


Kitty managed to shower, change and get downstairs in record time. It was amazing what a little incentive could do for her normally leisurely (as she preferred to think of them) bathroom habits. Never the less, by the time she emerged into the back 'garden' - or what would again be the garden soon - lunch was in full swing and chaos reigned supreme. She could only assume, from the way Ray was chasing Bobby through the narrow paths of the not quite reconstituted formal rose garden, that the yer ber boy had probably frozen Berzerker's lunch...again. _You'd think he would've learned his lesson the first time Ray chased him down and zapped him,_ she thought with amusement, _but no one is ever going to accuse the Iceman of learning from his mistakes._ As she watched, Ray caught the younger boy long enough to give him a low-grade toasting before letting him go and returning to his now defrosting meal.

Most everyone else was still scattered around on the new sod lawns or low walls surrounding the various gardens, conversing and eating - all except Jamie, who had duped himself and was playing a game of one on one on the recently completed basketball court. Kitty took a deep breath and headed for the 'table' where the food was collected. Bobby had obviously been pressed into service to provide it - good thing none of the food needed to be hot. She found that concentrating on loading her plate helped her ignore the feeling that she had a neon sign pulsing on her forehead for all to see. She wasn't sure whether it should proclaim her newly found love or her recently lost virginity, but, either way, she was quite sure it must be glaringly obvious.

"Hey, Kitty! Where've you been hiding all morning?"

She nearly jumped out of her skin as Scott's voice cut through the general clamor. Holding her plate in suddenly trembling hands, she turned to the older boy with a glare. "Can't a person take a little personal time around here without getting the third degree?" she snapped. She knew as soon as the words were gone beyond recall that the response was _way_ out of proportion to the question, and the looks of surprise on his and Jean's faces confirmed it.

"Jeez, touchy much?" Evan asked from his spot next to Amara on the low wall by the basketball court. She winced and flushed red under the sudden scrutiny of almost all of her housemates. _Well, I may not have been the center of attention before, but I sure am now._

"Um, like, sorry Scott," she started with a rather sheep smile. "I, um, skipped breakfast and I guess I'm, like, a bit grouchy now. Just let me, like, stuff my face and I'll be my normal sweet-natured self." She hated how the valley girlese seemed to just slip out when she was nervous.

"Hey, uh, no problem Kitty. I didn't mean to be nosy. It's just that it's not like you to disappear without saying anything." He and Jean exchanged a meaningful look and she knew that she was currently the subject of a private telepathic exchange - a fact which made her inordinately nervous under the circumstances. She found herself wishing that she had put more work into strengthening the mental shields the Professor had trained all of them to erect.

Everyone else seemed to have lost interest in her again - thank God - so when Scott gestured her over she took her plate and went to join Scott, Jean and Rogue at the foot of the main stairs, trying to ignore the odd look her former room-mate gave her as she did so.

"It's okay Scott," she told her team leader with a smile as she reached them. "I just, like, didn't have anything scheduled this morning for the first time in, like, weeks. I decided to take advantage of it and sleep in good and late, then spend some time away from all you guys for a change." She wasn't _really_ lying, she just wasn't telling them the whole truth. _Nothing wrong with that,_ she though defensively as she noticed Rogue giving her an another odd, unreadable look. _Nothing wrong with that at all._

She had been standing, juggling her plate and her drink, but Scott shifted to give her room on the step with them. "No problem Kit. Have a seat," he gestured to the spot between him and Rogue. "I just wanted to give you a heads up on a team drill in the Danger Room this afternoon. Two o'clock. We haven't done any proper training for ages, so I asked Logan to come help beat us into shape. I guess, from what Logan said, that Kurt won't be there, but the rest of us need the work anyway." Their 'Fearless Leader' looked positively gleeful at the prospect of getting back into his beloved Danger Room and, no doubt, working them all until they cursed his family to the seventh generation.

Kitty suppressed a resigned sigh. The only one around here who took even half as much pleasure in these drills as Scott and Logan was Kurt, and he wouldn't even be there. Damn! Out loud she only said, "Oh, um, sure. Two o'clock? I'll be there," but she exchanged a knowing look with Jean and Rogue. _Boys will be boys,_ it as good as said.

She sat gingerly down in the place Scott had cleared, trying not to wince. _That's not as bad as I thought it would be,_ she told herself - and it wasn't really. She was a _bit_ uncomfortable, but, the way she'd heard some of the girls at school talk, she'd expected to be too sore to sit comfortably for a week. _That'll teach me to listen to locker room gossip. They didn't have any idea what they were talking about._ Really, after the pain she'd psyched herself up to expect, both during and after, it had hardly hurt at all, and only for a little while. _Heck, the second time didn't really hurt at all,_ she thought with a private smile. As she shifted to try and find a more comfortable position on the hard stone step, she caught Rogue eyeing her yet again. Flushing with embarrassment she glanced nervously at Jean and returned her attention to her lunch. _Try and keep your mind *off* of that Pryde,_ she told herself firmly. The last thing she needed was to project something particularly incriminating in the older girl's presence.

Rogue's almost constant scrutiny was also giving her the distinct impression that sas gas going to want to avoid her former room-mate for the rest of the day if at all possible. Either that or prepare to answer, or evade, some rather personal and potentially embarrassing questions. Feeling decidedly uncomfortable, she concentrated on polishing off her lunch and let the conversations going on around her just wash over her.

Her reverie was broken by Rogue's light drawl, "Oh, and Kitty, remember ya promised ta help me with mah physics homework after lunch today. There oughta be plenty a' time before Mr. Military here," she indicated Scott with a jerk of her head, "drags us off for a pounding."

_Oh I am so screwed!_ Kitty thought with frustration as she met the older girl's suspiciously innocuous smile with a rather strained smile of her own.
"I really prefer Fearless Leader," Scott intoned seriously, a thoughtful look on his face. But," he added with a grin for the three girls, "dominus et deus'll do just as well in a pinch."

Jean's squeal of mock outrage as she upended the remains of her water bottle over their erstwhile 'lord's' head drew all eyes to the quartet on ttepsteps.

"Was it something I said?" Scott asked with feigned innocence, as water ran down his face in rivulets and the three girls broke down in breathless laughter.

Dominus et deus - Lord and god (latin)

Yes, I know the elf was rather rude and crude there for a bit. Yes, I know that's a tad out of character. Cut him some slack, he's a teenage boy (don't look at me like that, I've known hundreds of them in my life and I'm married to a guy who used to be one). They're _all_ rude and crude at some point to some extent (yes, even our beloved fuzzy elf) and they don't always mean for it to come out. He was hung-over, totally exhausted and suffering from mild dehydration and malnutrition. He f'd up, he knows it, we know it, Logan knows it. 'Nuff said. (I put this in b/c I received a few protests after this chapter went up elsewhere.)