Running to Stand Still

I apologize for the short, crappy chapter; I had skipped most of this part and went on writing, then came back to this because it needed to be written.

I promise, more to come.

Oh, and if you're reading this, Lucifer: I'm so flattered thatan han himself is so obessesed with this story the he has to keep making inane comments about it.

Enjoy.
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The air outside was bitingly cold but Kat hardly noticed as she ran through the woods as she had so many months ago. It seemed that the lake was her refuge, and running through the woods only happened when she was running from something.

She broke out of the trees and nearly stumbled over a fallen log. She wasn't crying yet, felt like she had cried everything out earlier. All she wanted to do was scream until her throat was raw, cry until she couldn't see anymore, just crawl into a hole and die. She'd never felt more betrayed in her short life and knowing that her mother had lied to her was more than she could deal with.

Kat fell onto the sandy shore, collapsed onto hands and knees as she emptied thetenttents of her stomach and then some, bile burning the back of her throat until she was dry heaving. When she managed to catch her breath she hit the ground and rolled into a fetal position, body rocking back and forth.

Distantly, as if coming from far away, she could hear the wildlife in the forest, birds and squirrels communicating in their animal languages. She barely noticed them, as far gone as she was in her own little world, and because of that she didn't notice the dark shape watching her from the cover of the trees.

Logan had disregarded her plea for privacy, instinctually knowing that being alone would do her no good. He loped over to her and picked her up, cradling her sobbing body against his own, stroking her hair and whispering soothing nonsense to her. He'd slipped the necklace into his pocket, meaning to keep it with him until he knew she could deal with the ramifications of her mother's actions.

He held her tight, listening to the broken sounds she made as she sobbed, wishing he could get inside her and heal all the invisible wounds. It hurt him on some level that he couldn't do that, that he couldn't spare her this pain after everything else that she had dealt with in almost 19 years.

** Logan, is everything all right? **

He shook his head, still not used to Xavier and his mental speaking.

** Kat got some bad news, it hit her pretty hard. I think everything's under control
now. **

** Make sure that she comes by to see me sometime today, Logan. It's imperative that she begins a process of counseling. **

** Sure thing, Chuck. We'll be in soon. ** Logan felt the Prof leave his mind and was able to focus on Kat again, who was beginning to stop crying, though her breathing was still erratic.

"Better?" he asked softly, strokher her hair.

She nodded, sniffling. "Yeah, better. Should've known you'd come after me."

"I couldn't let you be alone in this," Logan replied, holding her away so he could look in her eyes. "You are never alone in anything as long as I'm around. Don't forget that."

"I'll try not to." She glanced down at her hands. "They're probably waiting for us inside."

Logan took that as her admission that she was ready to be around her friends again. He brought them both to their feet but held her in his arms for a moment, leaning down to kiss her warmly. "Let's go, darlin'."

*****

Everyone was assembled in the den, and the only place left to sit was an armchair. Logan sat in it and Kat situated herself in his lap, snuggled in his arms.

Xavier sat in his wheelchair near the window and the fireplace, a blanket thrown over his legs. Rogue sat with Scott on the couch, Remy on the far end with Jubilee on the arm of the couch next to him. St. John and Bobby sat on the floor in front of them, Kitty in Bobby's lap. Storm sat demurely in the window seat.

"Okay everyone," Jubilee said, wearing her usual Day-Glo yellow with her shades perched in her black hair, "I've put all our names in this jar, and we're all gonna pick someone to be Secret Santa for." She took out a name for herself and passed it along to Remy as she explained. "Small gifts every day for the next two weeks, anything under five bucks. The big one, let's keep it under $100 for you big spenders. We'll open those on Christmas Eve. Got it?"

There was general nodding, seeing as no one was dumb enough to argue with Jubilation Lee, the terror of the mansion.

Logan watched a smile appear on Kat's face as she read who she'd gotten. "Who is it?"

She leaned over and whispered, "Rogue. I think I'll have to buy her some lingerie, make Scott go nuts."

"So there is something going on between those two?" he whispered back, eyebrows raised.

"Mmm-hmm. Knowing my luck she got me and is thinking the same thing about what to get me." Kat shrugged. "Oh well. I'll have fun shopping cos it means I'll have to get myself something, too."