Ooh that is a rough one. You've once again really well emphasised just how broken poor Emma is in a way where even a small set back sets her spiralling.
That a chess defeat triggers her so badly in relation to her father's emotional abuse is very sad and even worse when it leads to then rejecting having a relationship with Jean. Her stereotyped idea of lesbians must be also feels very accurate to both her upbringing and the early 2000s setting.
It's ironic that Scott is inadvertantly messing with Jean's new relationship! (I'm not sure how it could happen but it would be nice if they met and realised who they were)
Nice writing! I look forward to another chapter and the palatte cleanser as well.
Ooh, lovely. That's a big change that they've finally got the feelings out in the open. It's interesting it comes after a fight and reconcilliation and Emma proving she really does care. Very nice.
I was also interested in the early bits. While obviously Emma's overboard in calling it a cult. It is a very big ask for a first date for lack of a better term to whisk your friend off to a new location and introduce them to all your friends at once with an extended stay. (How long is spring break anyway? A week).
And Emma, lol, "I don't want to go to your place and get brainwashed", -five seconds later-,"I better brainwash this guy to stop him saying girlfriend" oh dear, girl. Surprised Jean wasn't a bit more critical of this but hey they were making up.
Also poor Emma when her body issues come up even right after a good smooching.
Nice one DS! Looking forward to more.
Oh lovely chapter. Definitely good of Jean to give the outside perspective on Emma's dad and Shaw, and makes sense Emma would be defensive as well. It's interesting that Jean obviously assumes that Emma sees it that way too and has to change gears to try and convince her.
Interesting to have Xavier mentally pop in for a cameo, in a sense. The speed of him checking in here, well it is understand Emma finds it creepy! I wonder how much Jean has said to him.
Emma's diamond powers always confused me as it seems so out of left field, and apparently it's because Grant Morrison wanted Colossus on the team but he was too recently dead to use. lol. Good use of them here.
And that ending! Lovely and they are getting more clues, I think this chapter also contains our first hints that Jean is also feeling attracted romantically/physically. Nice work!
Chapter 16 - (sorry realised AFF doesn't attach chapter nos by default to reviews that i can see)
Very nice and heartwarming one. The contrast between her family life and being back with Jean is very well told. I especially like the touch of her unwinding and joking with Jean and then being rather embarassed about it.
The references to the other X-Men in photos were cool and of course the irony about her commenting on Scott.
Nice end with her begining to twig she's feeling more-than-friendly towards Jean.
Oh I seem to be behind on this, apologies.
This was an interesting chapter. the internal dynamics of the Frost family are intriquingly nasty. I did not realise that Christian's absence was such a mystery to all rather than it being an open secret to all he's been kicked out.
I was also intriqued by Shaw and Emma's reaction to him. When in his prescence she was entirely wary of him but later seem more interested, at least in the chess side of it, and of course wanting to impress her father.
Good chapter.
I do enjoy Emma's thoughts going to Jean with every more frequency. Are Emma's outfits based on comics ones, from her 616 youth or do you invent them yourself?
Oh you've made the other Frosts cousins rather than more siblings.
And poor Emma with all the come ons!
I must admit that I wasn't expecting Shaw and by extension the Hellfire club to figure into this. It bodes trouble if he gets too handsy, lol. Emma might end up with two mutant groups as options.
This is definitely a great chapter. Thanks for the explanation for the title at the bottom. It was very interesting too see Emma's father take the role of mediator and seem semi-reasonable while still being an intimitading figure that Emma's obviously very wary of. The reminder of Christian that while he can bend a little, so long as she's useful to him, he will still eject her if she crosses him directly or becomes useless.
It's interesting to have Jean be both friendly and willing to stand up to Emma's snobbery especially in defense of Scott which is lovely. Even more interesting that Emma does appreciate it and realising it's something she should be working on, that it's part of her bad family upbringing.
The final scene is just perfect though. Just a very real feeling indication of the bond and attraction growing between Emma and Jean. Shitty day - one conversation with Jean, even one where they argue a bit - She's beaming. Sweet and realistic.
Good job DS!
Ha! Well I think you're research paid off! I was very struck by how early 2000s this did feel. I wonder if Emma has seen any of those new superhero movies with black leather clad heroes?
The structure here was very well done with each visit ending with Emma biting her tongue and get more and more annoyed until it bubbles over. Well done.
Deserving or not, definitely underscore Emma's power and the potential problems with using it ethically!
Nice job all around!
Huh. Well those author's note are interesting to me because also as a guy I had no idea.
I figure that could have gone far worse. The trip is definitely unpleasant and you always keep Emma's issues in mind. Like not wanting anyone to see her bare feet!
The big thing that's going to cause problems is of course standing up to her mother, it was great she did it but boy is that going to get worse before it gets better,