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March 4, 2014 at 12:00 AM
It's getting hotter and hotter, and I honestly think this is my most favorite of the chapters you've put up so far for this story. For one, you make Reed not look like a complete asshole; inattentive and oblivious he may be a lot of the time, but he does love his family deeply and tries his best to make time to show them how much. Glad for that, even if I'd have liked to see Sue and Jen talk about Lyra, and I would've recommended Peter/Lyra if he were the same age as her, considering her whole thing at the beginning was finding this time's greatest hero and bearing powerful offspring by him --- and we all know who Marvel's greatest hero is. Speaking of Jen, loved not just the sex between her and Peter, but also her advice to Peter on enjoying life as it comes instead of feeling guilty and afraid all the time because of what he thinks others may think of him.
Oh, and if you're thinking about a spider-themed heroine for Peter to pair up with besides Julia Carpenter and not necessarily Jessica Drew, could you be referring to the Black Widow? They did have a certain level of chemistry in that Marvel Team-Up arc where she relapsed into one of her cover identities after severe torture and fell in love with Spider-Man while he was trying to protect her. Widow quickly put the kibosh on that once she regained her sense of self, even though she admitted to herself that she did feel a certain pull toward Spidey, denying it because she felt love had no place in her life.
Also, judging by the teaser title "The Mercenary" at the end, I'm guessing the next chapter is going to be Silver Sable, perhaps taking off from the two-issue arc before Ends of the Earth in which Spider-Man saved New York from a bomb while Silver was visiting on a diplomatic envoy and she showed her gratitude with a kiss. Could be interesting, and by the way, it's Victoria Hand, not Maria Hand. Been loving this story so far and looking forward to reading more of it when it comes.
Oh, and if you're thinking about a spider-themed heroine for Peter to pair up with besides Julia Carpenter and not necessarily Jessica Drew, could you be referring to the Black Widow? They did have a certain level of chemistry in that Marvel Team-Up arc where she relapsed into one of her cover identities after severe torture and fell in love with Spider-Man while he was trying to protect her. Widow quickly put the kibosh on that once she regained her sense of self, even though she admitted to herself that she did feel a certain pull toward Spidey, denying it because she felt love had no place in her life.
Also, judging by the teaser title "The Mercenary" at the end, I'm guessing the next chapter is going to be Silver Sable, perhaps taking off from the two-issue arc before Ends of the Earth in which Spider-Man saved New York from a bomb while Silver was visiting on a diplomatic envoy and she showed her gratitude with a kiss. Could be interesting, and by the way, it's Victoria Hand, not Maria Hand. Been loving this story so far and looking forward to reading more of it when it comes.
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March 4, 2014 at 12:00 AM
Nice new chapter, my friend. I enjoyed it. Plus, it was extra long and had an additional scene with Reed/Sue, which felt like a nice bonus. lol I mean why should Peter have all the fun anyways? lol Glad to see Aphrodite show up again. Interesting how she manipulates the passions of others, even when it's not directly related to Peter. Sue never really comes off as overly sexual, but I can see her having a sexy side that she reserves for private moments. So I think you handled that nicely.
But I love what you did with She-Hulk. I can definitely see her liking it rough. lol Given her durability and strength, I think that might be necessary for her to get the sensations she wants. That hair pulling was an interesting bit though. She really seemed to get off on that. Guess that's her thing. Same with the dirty talk. I think she was the dirtiest talker to date and in a good way. lol I'm sure Peter isn't used to that, but if you have She Hulk show up again I'm sure he'll get into it. Definitely one of your more unique scenes and very nicely done.
I also liked the little recap at the beginning that showed how Peter is still interacting with all these other women. I think that's a nice touch because it shows it's not just some passionless one night stand. These girls are acting like they're hooked on him, which may be the point I guess. I wonder how much of that is Aphrodite's doing and how much of that is Peter's. That would be something interesting to explore. As for other pairings, I'm sad to hear Emma won't be showing up. I think she could use a guy like Peter after her breakup with Scott. I know it hasn't happened yet in your timeline, but it would have been a nice touch. And if I had to vote, I would go with Jessica Drew. Maybe have her show up after Black Widow. As for others, I'm not sure how young you're willing to go with the girls. Maybe X-23 or vampire Jubilee could show up. But I'm not sure you'll want to do that. Maybe that's something for another story. Overall, still a great job. I'm really enjoying this story. Every chapter is worth waiting for. Keep up the great work, my friend!
MarvelMaster616
But I love what you did with She-Hulk. I can definitely see her liking it rough. lol Given her durability and strength, I think that might be necessary for her to get the sensations she wants. That hair pulling was an interesting bit though. She really seemed to get off on that. Guess that's her thing. Same with the dirty talk. I think she was the dirtiest talker to date and in a good way. lol I'm sure Peter isn't used to that, but if you have She Hulk show up again I'm sure he'll get into it. Definitely one of your more unique scenes and very nicely done.
I also liked the little recap at the beginning that showed how Peter is still interacting with all these other women. I think that's a nice touch because it shows it's not just some passionless one night stand. These girls are acting like they're hooked on him, which may be the point I guess. I wonder how much of that is Aphrodite's doing and how much of that is Peter's. That would be something interesting to explore. As for other pairings, I'm sad to hear Emma won't be showing up. I think she could use a guy like Peter after her breakup with Scott. I know it hasn't happened yet in your timeline, but it would have been a nice touch. And if I had to vote, I would go with Jessica Drew. Maybe have her show up after Black Widow. As for others, I'm not sure how young you're willing to go with the girls. Maybe X-23 or vampire Jubilee could show up. But I'm not sure you'll want to do that. Maybe that's something for another story. Overall, still a great job. I'm really enjoying this story. Every chapter is worth waiting for. Keep up the great work, my friend!
MarvelMaster616
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March 4, 2014 at 12:00 AM
Another interesting chapter. She-Hulk's post coital advice is my personal highlight. Love anything Spider-man of course.
You could stand to benefit greatly from a proofreader. There are ubiquitous small errors that really need cleaning up before this moves from a pretty good story to a great one.
You could stand to benefit greatly from a proofreader. There are ubiquitous small errors that really need cleaning up before this moves from a pretty good story to a great one.
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March 4, 2014 at 12:00 AM
I read your latest chapter for your story on and saw that end comment, I don't know why but I felt compelled to speak to you on this site for some reason, I will understand if you prefer to have this on the other site.
The way I figure if you want Emma there's two ways you can play it:
1) After the events of Dark Reign she and Scott have a falling out she leaves and during a random venture through New York she bumps into him. You could have them share a history where he was a true friend to her in college before she ran with the HC and after the thing with her Professor went sour when he found out she was a mutant, they talk and she feels that she owes him for that kindness he showed her then and now as he speaks to her regardless of her past or actions.
2) Again there is a fallout but after Schism where she chooses to leave for the school because she wants to teach not keep fighting, now in reverse of the kids from Jean Grey School visiting Horizon he comes per Hank's request and they run into one another and again shared past and hook up ensues.
If you feel like you can't get them together you could always leave that as a one shot...maybe have her, Firestar and him hook up or something.
I would like to offer a substitute for Emma and I say this because of a recent comic I saw that may work well with this (that is if you feel it works) and that person is Elizabeth Braddock AKA Psylocke. I figure she and him have the same problem, the loss of love, I mean she lost Warren and Fantomex and her didn't work out while she can't seem to adapt in Logan's school very well, so the way I see it she goes out to unwind and runs into him as Spider-man and given that he never saw if she was okay after their past run-in in the comic he would see she looks down, talk to her and well dot dot dot.
As far as Jessica Drew, well there is a certain rapport between them when you take into account how he welcomed her openly after the Invasion and helped her when the Mandrill controlled her so I can see why folks want to see her. Though you said Spider THEMED not powered...does that mean Natasha will take part in this? Because aside from Jessica and Julia (which makes me curious how you will make that work) the only other women I can think of are Mattie Franklin and Charlotte Witter.
But that is for the future, thank you for your time and for making that interesting read, you at least take time to have some story instead of making some cheap screw fest and I respect that.
I wish you the best of luck in your endeavors...Peace!
The way I figure if you want Emma there's two ways you can play it:
1) After the events of Dark Reign she and Scott have a falling out she leaves and during a random venture through New York she bumps into him. You could have them share a history where he was a true friend to her in college before she ran with the HC and after the thing with her Professor went sour when he found out she was a mutant, they talk and she feels that she owes him for that kindness he showed her then and now as he speaks to her regardless of her past or actions.
2) Again there is a fallout but after Schism where she chooses to leave for the school because she wants to teach not keep fighting, now in reverse of the kids from Jean Grey School visiting Horizon he comes per Hank's request and they run into one another and again shared past and hook up ensues.
If you feel like you can't get them together you could always leave that as a one shot...maybe have her, Firestar and him hook up or something.
I would like to offer a substitute for Emma and I say this because of a recent comic I saw that may work well with this (that is if you feel it works) and that person is Elizabeth Braddock AKA Psylocke. I figure she and him have the same problem, the loss of love, I mean she lost Warren and Fantomex and her didn't work out while she can't seem to adapt in Logan's school very well, so the way I see it she goes out to unwind and runs into him as Spider-man and given that he never saw if she was okay after their past run-in in the comic he would see she looks down, talk to her and well dot dot dot.
As far as Jessica Drew, well there is a certain rapport between them when you take into account how he welcomed her openly after the Invasion and helped her when the Mandrill controlled her so I can see why folks want to see her. Though you said Spider THEMED not powered...does that mean Natasha will take part in this? Because aside from Jessica and Julia (which makes me curious how you will make that work) the only other women I can think of are Mattie Franklin and Charlotte Witter.
But that is for the future, thank you for your time and for making that interesting read, you at least take time to have some story instead of making some cheap screw fest and I respect that.
I wish you the best of luck in your endeavors...Peace!
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January 13, 2014 at 12:00 AM
I was thinking Emma Frost would have shown up. She did apparently spend some time around Peter in a school setting.
Maybe add her after a breakup with Scott?
Maybe add her after a breakup with Scott?
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December 21, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Well despite the wait this was good, though I don't think MJ would be mad since this was her idea when she said they could be FWB's. Carol may have some issues, especially with Rogue, though this just makes me wonder if you won't have Peter get between the two and help them work it out before they decided to get to know each really well in the bedroom. So Jen? Well she did find him attractive during his black suit period, we still got Silver on the wings though I hoping you do give a Natasha a chance since despite the circumstances there was something there and I feel Peter would be good for her... I mean if the Devil wants your marriage than clearly the girl who gets with him is very lucky.
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December 21, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Another great chapter, Rogue is always a great subject for erotica. I'm glad it wasn't Kitty to be honest, although I am hoping Pete will have someone he can geek out with eventually.
I like your writing but there are a few places where I question your word choice:
Peter offered although he was pretty sure his boss would love to have Hank McCoy working here even if it was just now and then.
Would probably read a little better as:
Peter offered. He was pretty sure his boss would love to have Hank McCoy working here even if it was just now and then.
As much as your hints for the next woman interest me, I'm looking forward to these women overlapping. There's some great history and static between MJ and Felicia or Carol and Rogue that would be interesting to explore. I always find Spider-man's at his scatterbrained best when there are multiple women vying for his affection.
I like your writing but there are a few places where I question your word choice:
Peter offered although he was pretty sure his boss would love to have Hank McCoy working here even if it was just now and then.
Would probably read a little better as:
Peter offered. He was pretty sure his boss would love to have Hank McCoy working here even if it was just now and then.
As much as your hints for the next woman interest me, I'm looking forward to these women overlapping. There's some great history and static between MJ and Felicia or Carol and Rogue that would be interesting to explore. I always find Spider-man's at his scatterbrained best when there are multiple women vying for his affection.
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December 21, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Nice chapter, have to admit when you titled it 'The Mutant' I thought it would be Kitty. That's another thing, when you introduced everyone they acted like they met for the first time, I thought the X-men (most of them anyway) knew who Spider-Man was.
Uh oh, since I know this isn't a slash fic the lawyer can only be She-hulk, I can honestly say I am looking forward to that chapter, I have always been a fan of the unusual pairings.
If you are taking requests for girls then how about Storm (Ororo Munroe), Spider-Woman (Jessica Drew) and Silver Sable.
Well keep up the good work and I am looking forward to you updating this and when you get around to your Justice League Spider continuation story on FF.net.
Uh oh, since I know this isn't a slash fic the lawyer can only be She-hulk, I can honestly say I am looking forward to that chapter, I have always been a fan of the unusual pairings.
If you are taking requests for girls then how about Storm (Ororo Munroe), Spider-Woman (Jessica Drew) and Silver Sable.
Well keep up the good work and I am looking forward to you updating this and when you get around to your Justice League Spider continuation story on FF.net.
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December 21, 2013 at 12:00 AM
I like the choice for the mutant that becomes intimate with Peter. Kitty was a good choice but using Rogue was just as good of a choice. A woman that repressed will definitely need an outlet and with the abilities Peter has is practically the perfect match for her. Though Rogue is no doubt unaware of Peter's other girls in his life, I can see her not really hating the fact that she might have to share Peter considering the fact of the level of orgasms he can give her.
But Peter is becoming aware of the fact that something is a bit off since even he knows a man doesn't get that many women in their life without some kind of x-factor that's working in his favor. I'm curious to see if he'll figure it out in time or if he'll stop questioning it and go with the flow of the women's lust juices.
If the next woman is who I think, the next one to be introduced into Peter's harem, Peter might either think of what a way to go or maybe he knows something is definitely off. I am also deeply curious what the Love Goddess has planned for Peter. She maybe having fun but the fun of a god tends to have very grave consequences for all those involved. Can't wait for the next chapter.
But Peter is becoming aware of the fact that something is a bit off since even he knows a man doesn't get that many women in their life without some kind of x-factor that's working in his favor. I'm curious to see if he'll figure it out in time or if he'll stop questioning it and go with the flow of the women's lust juices.
If the next woman is who I think, the next one to be introduced into Peter's harem, Peter might either think of what a way to go or maybe he knows something is definitely off. I am also deeply curious what the Love Goddess has planned for Peter. She maybe having fun but the fun of a god tends to have very grave consequences for all those involved. Can't wait for the next chapter.
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December 20, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Another great chapter my friend. Always worth the wait! Nice to see you switching up the locations as well. Peter getting a little something while at work was a nice touch. I also like how you set it up with a field trip by the Jean Grey Institute. That actually sounds like something that could happen in the comics at some point. lol I also like how you touched on some of Rogue's romantic history. She actually hasn't had a lot of sexual experience, her powers not withstanding. Peter definitely has more experience on her, especially lately. And I can see her being somewhat overwhelmed by his skill, especially if she hadn't done it in a year like you mentioned. It was nice and basic, just the kind of thing you might expect from a quickie at work. lol It was fun and nicely done. Also like how you're adding a bit more detail into each chapter in terms of setting the scene up. That may seem secondary, but it definitely helps bring the chapter together. It may take longer, but it shows in the final product. Now it sounds like he'll be getting a shot at She-Hulk. That should be an interesting experience and an interesting test of strength. lol I'm looking forward to it my friend. Keep up the excellent work!
MarvelMaster616
MarvelMaster616