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November 2, 2009 at 12:00 AM
*fans self* That latest chapter was HOT. Loved it. I can't wait to see what sex between them will be like when Kelly isn't sore. And, I must wonder. Kelly didn't take any birth control, right? So will there be a baby victor in the future?
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October 28, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Despite the various errors here (which could be corrected by a good beta if you were to find one), the story line is extremely compelling. You have good characterization, and I'm rather surprised to find that your OC is a strong enough character to stand with Victor and not seem completely weak. Creed is being a little bit soft, but that can be chalked up to nothing more than him reclaiming bits of his humanity, as you stated early on.
For future chapters, though, I would suggest her getting a bit bolder and overstepping her bounds. There needs to be more tension between the two, and it's a great shot at some hurt-comfort. First, though, please do continue with that interesting build-up at the end of the most recent chapter...
Or in other words,
BRING ON TEH SECKS!
For future chapters, though, I would suggest her getting a bit bolder and overstepping her bounds. There needs to be more tension between the two, and it's a great shot at some hurt-comfort. First, though, please do continue with that interesting build-up at the end of the most recent chapter...
Or in other words,
BRING ON TEH SECKS!
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October 28, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Goodness the ending to chapter 3 was hot! Please, please update as soon as you can! Oh and don't worry, this chapter didn't send me running. Quite the opposite really. I'm staying to see what more naughty goodness Victor surprises us with. :)
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October 26, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I like the story. And yes, the new Sabertooth in Origins was pretty awesome ^.^. He's back to being Victor from the comics and t.v. series. I can't wait for the next chapter.
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October 26, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I don't normally comment on stories on here because Its rare that I find one that has me as enamored as this one. I'm already a big fan of Sab's and I love your girl, she's refreshingly imperfect and not mary-sue like!
I really hope you keep updating this one, because I'd love to keep reading it.
I really hope you keep updating this one, because I'd love to keep reading it.
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October 25, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Wow... Just a kiss and I'm already all hot and botherd! Good job!
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October 24, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I'm really enjoying this story so far. Please continue this soon.
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October 23, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Love it!!! You are very good at writing characters... maybe a little more detail would be nice? I hope you continue!
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October 18, 2009 at 12:00 AM
This is great so far. Please keep updating this story. :)