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for The Worst Shade of Green

by Nghtcrwlr

schedule February 18, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Hey there, nice story! Glad to see another Toad fan! By crazy coincidence I did this very same plotline in a roleplay recently! Great minds think alike, I guess? Crazy! Get out of my heaaad!!! Heehee.

Just a couple of constructive criticisms: A few spelling errors (who doesn't have those?) and I noticed you changed the characters ages from chapter to chapter (from 28-41 and 14-15). Callie's emotional state (while understandably turbulent) seemed also to flip-flop exceptionally. While I can totally see the Stockholm thing happening (and who wouldn't want to with Toad, mmm? I mean if he tied me up I'd call him Daddy ;-) )but her overwhelming love for him seemed really easy in acquiring. I for one would have liked to see a little more psychological manipulation before she became his willing slave.

But don't get me wrong; I loved it! Great job with Toad, especially, so few people get him right! Keep up the good work! :-)
person duce
schedule February 4, 2009 at 12:00 AM
wow what an intersting turn of events, wonder what is going to happen now that the mother in law is in the house!!! can't wait for the next chapter.
person duce
schedule January 13, 2009 at 12:00 AM
that was so sad and very unexpected. wow that was some chapter. I feel so bad for the way Toad treats her. Hope to read the next chapter soon. always checking for an update
person duce
schedule January 6, 2009 at 12:00 AM
wow very intense chapter, can't wait to read the next chapter
person Bodo
schedule December 18, 2008 at 12:00 AM
That is strong... but good. I like Toad and I think that he can be really cruel but inside he is just lonely.
person estelin
schedule December 2, 2008 at 12:00 AM
this was excellent. i hope there is more. i would laugh if there is a love/trust relationship building as well as if they have a kid
person Anon
schedule October 22, 2008 at 12:00 AM
wow, that was a very intense chapter