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November 30, 2014 at 12:00 AM
I love your Arcade. There is no monster quite like him.
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November 2, 2014 at 12:00 AM
well chapter 16, long wait but I think this was worth it as it was longer than the other recent chapters with a lot more of the mentality being shown which I think is a good touch. Like what she did to Rahne in the shower and what happened there makes sense to me. I don't know this Doc character but I couldn't find him so I guess he's someone you made up? But it does help explain how they are able to suddenly keep working given some of the things the women get put through. And it was nice seeing how Rahne was enjoying it as one of the few things she can enjoy and that line of 'can't take anything more but how she can still give something' was a good part.
There were a couple of spelling mistakes but only a few that I noticed.
The Tigra part was an interesting twist on I guess you can call it 'tentacle' sex, at first I thought it would be some kind of sea monster or something (which I guess can show up later) although the pill making her breath better, I think maybe convert oxygen in her lungs might make more sense. Kind of like having that liquid in your lungs from that movie The Abyss. We did finally see that Tigra is working and that even though she was tortured for the information she is getting deeper and deeper.
I have to wonder if the next chapter we'll see Dagger's punishment to tell him which guard and maybe forcing her to kill him (even if it's just to push a button) I think the last time we saw Dagger you had her getting fisted by a woman while being ass fucked by a guy from Taskmaster's group. Since that was several hours ago we can see her going to her next 'appointment' (maybe after an hour rest) only to find herself doing something else on Arcade's order.
There were a couple of spelling mistakes but only a few that I noticed.
The Tigra part was an interesting twist on I guess you can call it 'tentacle' sex, at first I thought it would be some kind of sea monster or something (which I guess can show up later) although the pill making her breath better, I think maybe convert oxygen in her lungs might make more sense. Kind of like having that liquid in your lungs from that movie The Abyss. We did finally see that Tigra is working and that even though she was tortured for the information she is getting deeper and deeper.
I have to wonder if the next chapter we'll see Dagger's punishment to tell him which guard and maybe forcing her to kill him (even if it's just to push a button) I think the last time we saw Dagger you had her getting fisted by a woman while being ass fucked by a guy from Taskmaster's group. Since that was several hours ago we can see her going to her next 'appointment' (maybe after an hour rest) only to find herself doing something else on Arcade's order.
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October 14, 2013 at 12:00 AM
The content of your story would normally scare me off. The darkness and viciousness get to me, especially Dagger's chapter. However there is a line in your first chapter that gripped me beyond nearly any other piece of fanfiction:
"When I’ve shuffled off this mortal coil, I want people to say ‘Boy, I’m glad that twisted mother fucker is gone’.”
This admission is amazing. Arcade's ambition is to be remembered and hated. He then has to prove himself to the reader. The more horrifying, the more imaginative, the more despicable, the better. And through you he shows himself to be a monster's monster.
There is also an inherent promise in his statement. What he does to the women will be known. This gives the situation a dark sense of hope. I don't believe I could read a story about sexual slavery without that hope. However, rescue or release for these women is also a measure of Arcade's character and during his, however eventual, comeuppance his mark will be as permanent as the A he branded into his victims.
I also love how Arcade is both a hands on threat and a background mastermind in the terror he rains upon his captives. It creates a bleak environment I quite enjoy exploring.
Admittedly, I am a cartoon fan and was unfamiliar with many of your cast when I started reading this story. That said, I quite enjoyed using this story as the launching point to discovering more of the Marvel universe. I quite like the offshoot with the New Mutants as well.
You have created a terrifying piece of work in such a creative and engaging way. I will devour any more if you choose to continue this.
"When I’ve shuffled off this mortal coil, I want people to say ‘Boy, I’m glad that twisted mother fucker is gone’.”
This admission is amazing. Arcade's ambition is to be remembered and hated. He then has to prove himself to the reader. The more horrifying, the more imaginative, the more despicable, the better. And through you he shows himself to be a monster's monster.
There is also an inherent promise in his statement. What he does to the women will be known. This gives the situation a dark sense of hope. I don't believe I could read a story about sexual slavery without that hope. However, rescue or release for these women is also a measure of Arcade's character and during his, however eventual, comeuppance his mark will be as permanent as the A he branded into his victims.
I also love how Arcade is both a hands on threat and a background mastermind in the terror he rains upon his captives. It creates a bleak environment I quite enjoy exploring.
Admittedly, I am a cartoon fan and was unfamiliar with many of your cast when I started reading this story. That said, I quite enjoyed using this story as the launching point to discovering more of the Marvel universe. I quite like the offshoot with the New Mutants as well.
You have created a terrifying piece of work in such a creative and engaging way. I will devour any more if you choose to continue this.
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January 31, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Not sure if you're taking ideas but how about a chapter that has one of them think that they are being rescued but it's all a lie to put them into a false sense of security? Maybe someone like the Camelion or Mastermind that messes with them making them think they were saved by a friend or friends like say other team members and just when they feel safe things turn into a nightmare as they turn on the person(s) that were 'rescued'? Maybe even pulling away to show them in a virtual world as one of Arcade's little ways of breaking them?
Also I saw these images once of Tigra and Kraven the hunter not sure if he's alive or not in this universe but it gave me a thought of something you could use as you haven't done Tigra yet in the new chapters.
Also I saw these images once of Tigra and Kraven the hunter not sure if he's alive or not in this universe but it gave me a thought of something you could use as you haven't done Tigra yet in the new chapters.
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October 31, 2012 at 12:00 AM
Been following this for a long time, since it was first posted on grey arcive.
This is just a thought but it seems like Arcade has personaly only fucked Tigra. Surprisingly good taste there, anyway can't see him not explioting her hydrophobia. Er, have you ever been to waterbondage.com? So, yeah. Could we see some of that?
This is just a thought but it seems like Arcade has personaly only fucked Tigra. Surprisingly good taste there, anyway can't see him not explioting her hydrophobia. Er, have you ever been to waterbondage.com? So, yeah. Could we see some of that?
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June 19, 2011 at 12:00 AM
I'm not too sure if you're still taking ideas but if you are I might have a few. First off since Page, Maria and Bonita got pregnant they should still be able to produce milk from their breasts. You could have Arcade have them 'milked' daily for special milk drinks he could sell or make the others drink. Even for the next Rahne and Maria scene you could have the guards force Rahne to suck on her nipples until she gets milks and then place milking cones on the other girls tits. Maybe even for Rahne to fuck her with a strap on for their amusement.
Maybe it could even give Arcade an idea to inject needles into all the women's breasts with a chemical that induces lactation so all have morning milking and he could degrade them by calling them cows during it.
For Tigra, how about Craven the Hunter pays for a special hunt and mating. Not only that he wants a true hunters child and one with Tigra and his DNA he thinks would be great. So before Tigra is let loose he injects her with something that causes her body to be immediatly ready and he fucks her a few times to make sure she's pregnant since it only takes her 2 months to get pregnant from the comics apparently.
I'm also wondering if you'll ever go back and extend on the scenes, like the Dani one where she's acting in front of a group, the women with Task Master , Doctor Octopus actually fucking Monet and Narmita. Like maybe he fucks one one his lap while he makes her watch as the other gets two large tentacles in both pussy and ass, etc. I think those scenes were a bit too short and could be extended a bit more if you ever get the time. Hell I'd help out if needed but this is your story after all and I can't wait for more.
Maybe it could even give Arcade an idea to inject needles into all the women's breasts with a chemical that induces lactation so all have morning milking and he could degrade them by calling them cows during it.
For Tigra, how about Craven the Hunter pays for a special hunt and mating. Not only that he wants a true hunters child and one with Tigra and his DNA he thinks would be great. So before Tigra is let loose he injects her with something that causes her body to be immediatly ready and he fucks her a few times to make sure she's pregnant since it only takes her 2 months to get pregnant from the comics apparently.
I'm also wondering if you'll ever go back and extend on the scenes, like the Dani one where she's acting in front of a group, the women with Task Master , Doctor Octopus actually fucking Monet and Narmita. Like maybe he fucks one one his lap while he makes her watch as the other gets two large tentacles in both pussy and ass, etc. I think those scenes were a bit too short and could be extended a bit more if you ever get the time. Hell I'd help out if needed but this is your story after all and I can't wait for more.
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March 31, 2011 at 12:00 AM
Its been a Looonnng time since I've reviewed this, though I have tried to keep up lately.
Item 2: I have Not kept up with the Marvelverse so details from Civil War, Skrull invasion, zombies, Alot of the small stuff from the last several years I'm clusless about.
Someone else has now brought up what might be a consequence of if anyone talks enough or even too much in the wrong place or time, and is overheard. Also, the writer has now offered the best 'chance' as I mentioned in other posts about any Heroes finding out about all this. How? That A.I.M. delivered Ant-man helmet. Way, way back Tony Stark dealt with finding out when his tech was in the wrong hands. Reed Richards (I believe, not sure) has shown more than a few times that safeguards are in place with his. Both Hank and more so with Janet, as her's have evolved With her instead of being just very complex nuts & bolts technology, are or Should be in-tune with those same wavelengths with that helmet. But.... turn that around.
Janet is already a short cute thing in a little black dress, a pair of strappy stiletto heels and a couple baubles dangling from her slender right wrist as she walks from a function at the NY Historical Society, up Central Park West prior to cutting through the Park. Its twilight, the sun having set barely 5 minutes earlier. As she enters the Park she hears a woman's voice in distress, and being the Hero she is, charges in. Willing the change she has done for Years with one part of her mind, but her focus on a person evidently in danger, and following that sound into the trees. Just a few yards off the footpath and she realizes something Very odd. She hasn't changed, and try as she might it Still won't happen.
She feels like.. she is being.. jammed? And such a smell; its formic acid. So strong. She collapses to her knees, its soo strong. She feels a sensation on her legs and across her shoulders. Its raining? Yes, its raining ants from the branches above. Something else in the air, it makes her dizzy. And... horny???
And over the next twenty odd minutes she is teased and enticed and tormented in such a sweeet way.
What is really humiliating though? A WNYW mobile camera crew caught the last 4 minutes or so.
And broadcasted it LIVE.
Our good writer could go either way, and I have said what should be done to Evil. As these other chps have been posted though, I've wondered what would happen to all those thugs, rapists, thieves and murderers if the girls Did somehow win their freedom. Someone else said their hero days Are over, whether from the emotional, spiritual, or any combination of the different Types of damage they have suffered, or from the fact they Would meet just one who had Had them in something mundane as missionary position.
Think back. How Did Frank Castle get started. No, better, WHY?
BTW Agent-G, please keep posting.
Item 2: I have Not kept up with the Marvelverse so details from Civil War, Skrull invasion, zombies, Alot of the small stuff from the last several years I'm clusless about.
Someone else has now brought up what might be a consequence of if anyone talks enough or even too much in the wrong place or time, and is overheard. Also, the writer has now offered the best 'chance' as I mentioned in other posts about any Heroes finding out about all this. How? That A.I.M. delivered Ant-man helmet. Way, way back Tony Stark dealt with finding out when his tech was in the wrong hands. Reed Richards (I believe, not sure) has shown more than a few times that safeguards are in place with his. Both Hank and more so with Janet, as her's have evolved With her instead of being just very complex nuts & bolts technology, are or Should be in-tune with those same wavelengths with that helmet. But.... turn that around.
Janet is already a short cute thing in a little black dress, a pair of strappy stiletto heels and a couple baubles dangling from her slender right wrist as she walks from a function at the NY Historical Society, up Central Park West prior to cutting through the Park. Its twilight, the sun having set barely 5 minutes earlier. As she enters the Park she hears a woman's voice in distress, and being the Hero she is, charges in. Willing the change she has done for Years with one part of her mind, but her focus on a person evidently in danger, and following that sound into the trees. Just a few yards off the footpath and she realizes something Very odd. She hasn't changed, and try as she might it Still won't happen.
She feels like.. she is being.. jammed? And such a smell; its formic acid. So strong. She collapses to her knees, its soo strong. She feels a sensation on her legs and across her shoulders. Its raining? Yes, its raining ants from the branches above. Something else in the air, it makes her dizzy. And... horny???
And over the next twenty odd minutes she is teased and enticed and tormented in such a sweeet way.
What is really humiliating though? A WNYW mobile camera crew caught the last 4 minutes or so.
And broadcasted it LIVE.
Our good writer could go either way, and I have said what should be done to Evil. As these other chps have been posted though, I've wondered what would happen to all those thugs, rapists, thieves and murderers if the girls Did somehow win their freedom. Someone else said their hero days Are over, whether from the emotional, spiritual, or any combination of the different Types of damage they have suffered, or from the fact they Would meet just one who had Had them in something mundane as missionary position.
Think back. How Did Frank Castle get started. No, better, WHY?
BTW Agent-G, please keep posting.
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January 31, 2011 at 12:00 AM
So glad to see an update here. I love this story! Well-written, dark, and with some of my favorite heroines getting full attention. Thank you man, and please keep it up.
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January 3, 2011 at 12:00 AM
you know I had been wondering about this and then suddenly an update. Have to admit the ant thing was a surprise and something I never thought of before or even seen. I wasn't sure if Paige actually could take on other forms so I did some research and it was mentioned she could take on animal forms so I guess other humans is a possibility too (although apparently nothing bigger than her mass)
Although what AIM incident? Was that something that I missed or something?
I have to wonder what you plan for Tigra, will she be given choices to help Arcade with the women or he told to take part in it. I could see him do something like blindfolding one of the women and ordering Tigra to torture and rape them as he records it as leverage. Plus her own humiliations as well as it was evident she doesn't get any free passes.
I also wonder from the Cathy and Dallas fight in chapter 3, was the the only time the women were forced against each other? If so or not is there hard feelings between people like Cathy and Dallas or will they get their own little treatments?
Although what AIM incident? Was that something that I missed or something?
I have to wonder what you plan for Tigra, will she be given choices to help Arcade with the women or he told to take part in it. I could see him do something like blindfolding one of the women and ordering Tigra to torture and rape them as he records it as leverage. Plus her own humiliations as well as it was evident she doesn't get any free passes.
I also wonder from the Cathy and Dallas fight in chapter 3, was the the only time the women were forced against each other? If so or not is there hard feelings between people like Cathy and Dallas or will they get their own little treatments?
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November 30, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Are you going to continue? I hope so.